A Comedy of AR's

Chapter 16
CHAPTER 116 .......... Searching for Evidence

Chapter Description: Images for this story can be found at the following web...... https://sites.google.com/view/comedy-ars-characters/home

CHAPTER  116

HOSHIKO SENDS AN EMAIL TO HER FATHER IN JAPAN

Dear Papasan,

Today was almost a terrible day.  My lab partner, Darakatoms, did a terrible action in Health class which I can not talk about, but I thought he would be expelled from school. 

Everyone thinks that a bad girl named Sally gave him poison cake during homeroom.  It is good that I refused to eat this.  He was taken to the hospital and he was close to death.  I went with many students on a school bus to see him at the hospital and we were glad that he survived.  I also met his mother.

I also found a new friend.  She is a girl and her name is Madeline who came to sit with me at lunch.  She also sits near me and Darakatoms in most of our classes.

In America, I am worried and confused.  I do not understand why someone would do such a bad thing to another person.

Love, Hoshiko

HOSHIKO’S FATHER RESPONDS

Dear Hoshiko,

We are sorry to hear what happened to your friend, Darakatoms, but we are happy he is well now.  The girl, Sally, must be very evil and be punished if she did this.

We are very glad you have another friend.  This will make your experience in America much better. There are some things you can talk about with a girl that you could not tell the boy.  Over time, you will become better acquainted with your new surroundings and make even more friends.  Your mother and I wish you well.

Love, Papasan

MADELINE DAZILME JOTS NOTES IN HER DIARY

Dear Diary,

My secret crush on Derrek may not be so secret anymore.  But today was crazy.  He was almost murdered by that monster Sally girl who gave him poison cupcakes which Hoshiko and I wisely refused to touch.

She tried to poison him with an overdose of Viagra.  This all made sense because in Health class, he got an uncontrollable erection which was so bad, he had to take it out of his pants and show everyone his penis.  I was shocked he would do this, but I kind of felt a little guilty for laughing because his penis was very cute … smaller than an adult man.

But then his eyes rolled back in his head and it looked like he was going to faint … but he didn’t fall.  All the kids in health class went bonkers when he started masturbating into Duchess’s face.  Duchess went wacko and screamed when he spermed her face, but I think she deserved it.  She was heckling Derrek and she’s a skank anyway.

And Duchess sat on my left, so I’m glad it wasn’t me.  I’m sorry I laughed at her, but she looked so ‘beautiful’ with gunk all over her face.  Mr. Bimbo said Derrek would be expelled from school, but he didn’t know yet about the poisoning.

Hoshiko and I went on the bus with the football team to see him at the hospital.  This is when I decided to be very bold … and maybe a little naughty.  Derrek was wearing one of those hospital gowns that are supposed to tie up in the back, but his wasn’t.

So when I went to hug him, I put my right hand around his back and into the opening.  I patted his right buttock and rubbed my hand in a circle.  He felt soft.  OMG!  I couldn’t believe I was actually touching him. 

He didn’t get another boner like I hoped, but I did watch his eyelids peel back. He must have been really surprised that I did that.  I hoped he wouldn’t get mad at me.   

Maybe now he’ll realize that I’m fond of him.  He had seemed like the type of boy who was deathly afraid to touch a girl … like way too respectful.

I just love Derrek’s little body.  I would love to play with it some more.  But if he ever finds out about my disease, it will all be over quickly.  Then, instead of Sally, he’ll be calling me the monster.

BACK TO DERREK

Dr. Gauze was satisfied with the progress I made, so the hospital released me to go home at 7 pm.  And I got a good night’s sleep.  But Sammantha found the following note in her email:

Dear Parents:

As you may be aware, one of our students was poisoned today at school.  We are happy to report that he has made a quick recovery in the hospital and will return to school.  No other students had any symptoms.  As Principal, I can assure you we will leave no stone unturned in searching for the source of the illness.

You can be assured that our cafeteria will continue to operate under our normal high standards, but for the time being, I ask that you not send your child to school with any food that is to be shared with others.                                       Principal Tiffany Glass

I was anxious to go back to school the next morning.  It was Thursday (Day 4).  As I ate breakfast, Sammantha leaned on my shoulder as said, “Ooooh, so I got to meet your secret crush Madeline yesterday.  She’s cute.”

“Both girls are nice, Mom.”

“Yeah, but Madeline seemed to have a ‘wandering hand’ problem.  She found the slit in your gown and copped a feel on your bum.”

“You saw that, Mom?”

“I see a lot of things, sweety.  Maybe your secret crush isn’t so secret.  Maybe she likes you.”

“I don’t know, Mom.  It was probably just a tease.  She saw an opportunity to do something I could never do.”

“Are you going to say something to her?”

“Not about that, Mom.  I would be way too embarrassed.  What happened in Health class was bad enough.”

“So who do you think poisoned you, sweety?”

“I honestly don’t know.  I’ll leave it up to the people who will leave ‘no stone unturned.’

Lots of kids were asking me about what happened yesterday, and I wasn’t really sure, other than the fact that I was given an overdose of Viagra.  And plenty teased me about the sexual ‘problem’ that resulted.

“Your dick is cute Derrek. You should do it again.”

“If you weren’t on your death bed, the school would never let you back.”

“You think maybe Duchess turned you on?  Ha!  She deserved it.”

“So that’s how a boy jerks off?  You gave us an entertaining show.”

“That’s the second penis I’ve seen this week.  Starline’s grandpa was the first.”

“My mom says I’m not allowed to watch porn on the internet, but I am allowed to watch you.”

Sally was also there in homeroom.  I wasn’t sure what she was thinking, but she did not approach.  She was probably warned by the principal to stay away from me.

My two friends tried to reassure me and not to be embarrassed.  Hoshiko said, “Darakatoms, at first, I thought you became one of the bad boys, but when Mr. Bimbo came back and told us the ambulance was coming, I became very worried.”

Madeline giggled and confessed, “Those hospital gowns they give you are really … um, airy.”

My face turned red.  I just couldn’t bring myself to respond to her highly suggestive remark, so I just said, “You two were smart, not to sample the cupcakes.”

Our homeroom teacher, Miss Premo, quietly walked over and said, “The police detectives shut down my room when you went to the hospital.  They were picking up crumbs on the floor from Sally’s cupcakes to examine in their lab.”

“That’s something that bothered me, Miss Premo.   Sally didn’t tell me which cupcake to eat first … and I passed the rest to other classmates.  But I was the only one to get sick.”

She replied, “It’s certainly a puzzle.”

Before homeroom was over, I wanted to apologize to Duchess, but I didn’t want to just come out and say ‘Hey, I’m sorry I ejaculated in your face yesterday.  I normally don’t do that sort of thing.’

But the girl saved me the trouble.  As soon as I approached, she held up a hand and barked out, “Get the fuck out of my face, you pig!  Get away from me!  Just go to hell!”

John Jump Jr., sitting behind her, rudely commented, “Hey Duchess, did your face get pregnant?”

“Shut up, asshole!” she yelled, while hitting his head with a folder.

I took a lot of ribbing the rest of the school day, but I didn’t let it bother me.  I was happy just to be alive.

In second period Spanish class, Senorita Gato said, “Bienvenido nuevo, Diego.  (Welcome back Diego)  Nosotros no queriamos celebrar el dia de los muertos muy pronto.”  (We did not want to celebrate the Day of the Dead so soon.)

I replied, “Gracias, Professora.”

In third period English class, the ever un-cheerful Mrs. Bullutis came over to our table and reminded me in a stern voice, “As long as you’re still alive, Derrek, you and Randy are expected to fulfill your detentions here this afternoon.”

“Yes, Ma’am ………..Yes, Ma’am,” we replied.

At fourth period lunch, my teammates once again stood and clapped as I came to my seat at the table.

“We’re glad you’re still with us Derrek,” said Captain X.

“So am I.  This team needs as many warm bodies as can show up.”

Goro said to the team, “You know, we heard rumors that Derrek wanted to quit Coach Bimbo’s fifth period.”

“Huh?” I reacted.

Goro continued, “So a few of us got together and convinced Derrek to stick it out in Health Class.”

“Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh,” a collective groan rolled across the double table and a few teammates pounded their fists in appreciation.

Batty added, “We’ve given it a new name, Derrek … the ‘Duchess Hartless beauty treatment’.”

The team responded again with level 2 (medium) laughter.

Showkat concurred.  “These girls will be lining up to get the good stuff from you, Adams.”

Captain X got up from his seat and came around to my side of the table.  But instead of stopping by me, he went two seats further down and stood behind Randy Pantz.  Then, with both hands, he began massaging the middle trapezius muscles above Randy’s collarbone.

No one could figure out the motives of our captain, but he asked Randy, “How does that feel?”

Randy answered, “Pretty good, thanks.”  (He did not bother to ask why X was doing this.)

“How about now, Randy?” asked X.

“Well, it’s getting a little stronger, so you can stop now.”

“How about now?”

Randy complained, “Okay, you’re really starting to hurt me now, X, so could you please stop?”

X didn’t stop.  I wondered why he was doing it, and I knew that his hands were as strong as any adult’s … so if his goal was to inflict pain, he could do it.

“Oooooooowwwwwwww!!” cried Randy.  “Stop already!!”

“You’ve been really quiet this morning,” said X.  “You didn’t even pull one prank in Mr. Victum’s class.  How come?”

Randy cried louder, “Cuz I didn’t feel like it!!   Oooowww!!  Stop it!!”

At that moment, two shadows fell across our table.  They belonged to Coach Parker and Principal Glass.

The coach leaned past Captain X and stated, “Mr. Pantz, there’s a few questions we’d like to ask you.”