A Comedy of AR's

Chapter 26
Bed, Bath, and Beyond

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When we got back to the apartment, I helped Kitti locate two large pots to warm up two gallons of milk.  From our experience, Sammantha and I discovered that a bath mixture of 50 percent milk and 50 percent water would not affect me.  But to err on the side of caution, we decided not to increase the water beyond that … So there it was, two gallons each of milk and water got us started. 

“Kitti, I need to check how hot each pot is before we pour it in the tub.”

“Sounds like you’re a real chef on this recipe, Derrek.”

“Uh huh … Mommy taught me that it has to be just right … like Goldilocks eating her porridge.”

Kitti pulled up the stopper in the tub, and one by one, she dumped four pots of liquid to partially fill it up. 

I put a hand in it and swished it around.  “It feels nice.  Can you help me get undressed now in my bedroom?”

I can’t believe I actually said those words to her.  It’s so wrong.  It’s so immoral.  I’m wondering if Sammantha ever stopped to think this through.  As a ten-year-old, I can legally fuck my mom, but if I mess with a sixteen-year-old, well, that’s got to be a pretty gray area of the law.

I sat down on my bed and raised my arms.  “Kitti, I always have problems taking off my shirt.”

“Well, it won’t be a problem now, sweety … Is that what your mommy calls you?”

“Uh huh.  You can call me sweety too.”

Kitti took hold of the bottom of my shirt and pulled it inside-out over my head.  I said ‘thanks’ and leaned back with the rest of my body falling flat on the bead.  Kitti did not need any instructions from here, obviously having plenty of experience undressing little boys for their bath. 

Off came my shoes and socks.  When she undid my pants buckle and zipped down my fly, I thought I would die.  ‘Waves’ of tingly sensations captured my nervous system.  In my head, I was shouting ‘No, No, No!’ and following that with ‘Yes, Yes, Yes!’

This was so agonizing.  Now she was reaching for the waistband of my underpants and there was nothing I could do to stop her.  This was so … so … wrong.

When the deed was done, I had to quickly think of something romantic to say to my teenage lover.

I pointed at the offending organ.  “This is my penis.  Mommy says that only boys have a penis and not girls.”

“Your mommy’s very smart, Derrek.”

“And when it’s sticking up like it is now, she says that means my penis is very happy.”

“Oh really?” Kitti mused, “I thought that maybe you had a rabbit in your pocket.”

“Oh no, bunny rabbit is right here.”  I reached back to grab my bunny, but I knew damn well, she was quoting a classic line from the movie ‘Who framed Roger Rabbit?’.

Kitti grabbed my wrists and popped me back up onto the floor.

I explained, “Bunny rabbit can’t take a bath because he doesn’t like getting wet … but I want to get my rubber duckies so I can play.”

Kitti helped me take the big step into the tub and I immediately got down on my stomach to immerse myself in the warm liquid … and to rub my penis on the base of the tub.  I had no semen to ejaculate, but that’s all I could think of at the moment.  My carnal thoughts would have to wait.

I sat up straight in the tub and pushed my duckies around in the milk.  I pointed to the corner.  “Mommy uses that bucket to pour milk on my head so she can wash my hair.”

“Well Derrek, you have quite a head of hair to wash … And I’ll bet the girls your age think you are super cute!”

I crashed two of my duckies together and repeated, “Girls don’t have a penis, only boys.”

Kitti, by now, certainly must have thought I was mentally deficient.  She smiled at me and scrubbed away at my head and various body parts.  I figured this would be the closest contact I would have with her and it was really enjoyable.  When she scrubbed my boner, I couldn’t help but let out a little squeal.

“She remarked, “Does that tickle you, Derrek?”

I turned my head away sheepishly and let out an embarrassing, “It tickles.”

She laughed a little herself and replied, “That’s okay, sweety.  You’re allowed to be ticklish.”

Then she used the washcloth to grab the head of my penis and give it a little ‘twisty’ scrub.  For that, I kicked my feet and squealed loudly … but with laughter.

“You’re a sensitive little boy, aren’t you?” she mused.

(Enough … I covered my penis with ducks.)

“Okay, why don’t you flip over so we can shine up your butt.”

I guess ‘shine up’ was another word for scrub.  I expected that, but I wondered if she was going to do the ‘digital insert’, which I associated with either a clean-freak or a dominatrix.

“Are you a dirty little boy, Derrek?”

(Uh oh, cue the soapy finger.)

I tried not to engage in any wiggling or sound effects.  I thought maybe she was just being playful.  One extra push caused me to grunt, “Uhhh.”

“Oh I’m sorry, sweety, did I get your prostate there?”

Was she really asking me?  My best guess is that this sixteen-year-old was experimenting on my body to see if she could find it.  Mercifully, the experiment ended.  I sat up and she poured buckets of milk-water over my head to rinse off.

“You were a very good boy, Derrek.  Let’s get you out of the tub and dried off now.”

I estimated it to be a 90 percent chance that she would blow ‘raspberries’ into my belly and I would respond with the obligatory giggle.

I was right.  But it didn’t end there.

“Just look at all that fluffy hair you’ve got, sweety … Hey I’ve got an idea.  How about if we go into the living room and play more of the tickling game.  I want to see if you can tickle me too.”

And bingo.  My babysitter’s professionalism had just taken a left turn.  After all my previous impure imaginings, I was now having second thoughts.  I was about to become the latest ‘altar boy’, and yet I still figured that a little tickling couldn’t do much harm.

“Can bunny rabbit play too?” I asked innocently.

“Sure, go get bunny rabbit.”

I walked nude to retrieve my bunny, the whole time thinking, ‘This is all Sammantha’s fault.’

Upon returning to the living room, Kitti wasted no time making pretend scary noises and yelling, “I’m going to get you, bunny rabbit!”

I ran around the room in circles giggling and yelling back, “No you’re not!”

After a few laps, Kitti grabbed me around my waist and gently brought me down to the carpeted floor on my back.  She got started on my tummy with her fingernails and I couldn’t help but yowl and squeal.  Then she pressed my boner down several times and watched it ‘boing’ back up.  She was even saying ‘boing’ each time.

“Now you tickle me, Derrek.”

I decided to let the rabbit do my dirty work.  I brushed him against her bare midriff and said, “Tickle, tickle”, after which she pretended to laugh.

Then she turned me on my back again and straddled me around my mid-section.  Oh, I knew this can’t be good.

“Derrek, listen to me,” she spoke softly.  “Our play time is a secret just between you and me.  You can’t tell your mommy about it … So I want you to promise me you won’t tell her about anything that happens this weekend, okay?”

Being in a compromised setting, nude and on my back, it was not the ideal position from which to negotiate.  I replied, “Okay.”

“Say the whole sentence, sweety … like ‘I promise—‘.

I took a deep breath.  “I promise I won’t tell Mommy about anything that happens this weekend.”

“You’re a good boy, Derrek.  Did you ever kiss a girl?”

Well that didn’t take long.  I wasn’t sure if this girl was just horny … or the town molester.

I stared up blankly.  “No.”

“Just follow my lead, sweety.”

(Like hell … I wasn’t going to participate in my own molestation.)

Kitti did lips and tongue gymnastics on me while I laid there like a lump. Then I received a surprise.  She took a deep breath and blew hard into my mouth, blowing up my lungs like a balloon.

That sure got my attention.  I tried to gasp.  “Woooaaah!”

“Did you feel that, sweety?  That’s called mouth to mouth resuscitation.  Here, sit up for a second.  Do you like boobies?  Want to see my boobies?”

(I did when I first met you at the door … I’m not so sure right now.)

Kitti removed her halter top and leaned in.  “Do you like what you see, sweety?  Would you like to touch my boobies?”

(Of course I would, they were perfect.  Except I now realized that our roles had been reversed.  ‘Lolita’ was now molesting Humbert Humbert.)

I had to stick to my role as the ‘dumb’ kid.  So I pinched my own nipples and stretched them forward saying, “I have boobies too.”

Kitti Power was obviously losing patience with the ‘dumb’ kid, so she took matters into her own hands.  She leaned me back down flat on my back and went to work on my boner … with her mouth.

(Well now you went and did it, Kitti … Someone’s going to jail.  Well, maybe not, but this would certainly open up a legal conundrum.   Let’s say Kitti gets arrested for performing sex acts on a minor boy.  The first problem is that the boy was born 28 years ago.  So technically, he’s the adult … and at sixteen, she’s the minor, so Derrek Adams would go to jail.  Except that if you watch the FBI shows where an agent impersonates a child on the computer, as long as a person ‘intends’ to do sexual acts with a minor, then that person, Kitti, would go to jail.  But then Derrek could be arrested for the ‘entrapment’ of a minor, Kitti.  But Derrek did not ‘intentionally’ become ten years old.  And with a smaller brain than an adult, he probably had diminished mental capacity and was not responsible for his actions.)

In the meantime, Kitti was giving me one hell of a nice blow job.  I felt like I was being devoured.  My eyes had a spaced out look as I stared at the ceiling.  She was very persistent … and I’m sure that when my body suddenly stiffened, and I issued a high-pitched groan, she must have realized she had caused me to have an orgasm with a dry ejaculation.  My boyhood throbbed against her tongue.  I hoped she was satisfied now.

I felt very drowsy.  She picked me up and I leaned my head against her breasts.  I always liked that feeling.  Then she set me down on my bed and got me into my pajamas.  As she tucked me in, I mumbled, “bunny rabbit.”

She retrieved my bunny and I was down for the night.