Chapter Description: Anna is now a married woman and for better or worse she can't change that. Ryan will now be staying with her and the family until he goes away to college. That still presents Anna with a very awkward and scary immediate future. In this bumper update Annastarts finding out what it means to be a wife in Sallas, she is given some advice from her mother and then has to face her first night with her new husband...
Anna is now a married woman and for better or worse she can't change that. Ryan will now be staying with her and the family until he goes away to college. That still presents Anna with a very awkward and scary immediate future.
In this bumper update Annastarts finding out what it means to be a wife in Sallas, she is given some advice from her mother and then has to face her first night with her new husband...
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Anna hadn’t known what to expect after the eventful day but it seemed not much would change right away. When the socialising had finished Anna climbed into her father’s car with her parents. She wondered if life would pass for some semblance of normal until Ryan came to the car. Anna watched him get in but then determinedly looked out the window. Anna pushed herself into the door and as far from Ryan as she could manage on the backseat.
Most of the conversation in the car was between Harold and Ryan. It mostly concerned business, it was surreal for Anna who had just gone through two important life events and now it was like they hadn’t even happened. It was also strange that this was the most she had heard Ryan speak. His voice was deeper and more authoritative than she had expected.
In terms of what Anna learned from the conversations in the car the answer was not much. Ryan’s father ran some sort of finance company that made a lot of money and Ryan was going to inherit the whole thing. Ryan was going to be fast-tracked up the company ranks when he finished college and Anna’s parents seemed to think that was very exciting. Harold in particular seemed very keen to discuss specifics. Anna couldn’t have cared less, the only silver lining was that if he was very busy she wouldn’t have to see as much of him.
The real bombshell was only dropped at the end of the drive shortly before the car pulled up outside Anna’s home. It was then that Anna learned what the immediate future held.
“So, Ryan, you’ll be staying with us for two weeks before leaving for college.” Harold clarified, “I want you to feel at home so if you need anything just ask.”
“I’m sorry it’s not what you’re used to.” Michelle leaned around her seat looking like she was practically begging for forgiveness that she lived in a perfectly adequate house.
“You’re place looks lovely.” Ryan said.
Anna hadn’t expected Ryan to stick around. It was common for college-bound men to get married at the graduation and then leave the woman at home whilst they went off to higher education. As silly as it may have sounded Anna had been consoling herself with the fact that even though she was married she would have three years where she wouldn’t have to be with this stranger she was now wedded to. Having him around for the next two weeks sounded excruciatingly awkward, and worse, she had no idea how to act or how he would act for that matter.
“Anna, bring the bags in.” Harold ordered as they exited the vehicle.
“Shall I-” Ryan reached out a hand towards Anna but was stopped when Harold put his arm around the younger man and steered him towards the house.
“I’ll give you the tour.” Harold said loudly.
Anna watched the two men go with a frown. She was only brought back to her task when she heard her mother pop the trunk. Together the two women carried in their bags plus Ryan’s suitcases. As they went in through the front door Anna, who had Ryan’s suitcases in her hands, stopped unsure of where to take her cargo.
“Up to your room, dear.” Michelle said with the smile that had basically been painted on her face.
“M-My room…” Anna repeated.
“Of course. He’s your husband.” Michelle replied before turning away.
It might’ve just been coincidence but as Anna heard she was going to be sharing her bedroom with Ryan her bladder released a fresh soaking of pee into her already very wet diaper. She would certainly need a change sooner rather than later. Anna started up the stairs with her husband’s bags. She took them into her room and dropped them in the middle of the floor. When she looked at her crib she couldn’t help but feel a jolt of nervousness, there wasn’t exactly a lot of room in there for her let alone two people.
Anna heard heavy footsteps behind her and froze up. It definitely sounded like a male but she didn’t know who. She was faced away from the doorway and couldn’t look around. She jumped as a hand pressed against her diaper suddenly.
“You need a change.” It was Harold and for once in Anna’s life she was happy to hear him, “Get on the table.”
Anna pulled off the wedding dress she had still been wearing and dropped it on the floor without ceremony. She hopped up on to the top of the table and laid back for her father to change her. It was only a couple of minutes until she was safely taped into a fresh disposable.
“I’m not going to miss this.” Harold said as he dropped the soaked diaper into a plastic bag.
“It’s not like I asked you to do it in the first place…” Anna muttered. Of course she didn’t ask for Harold to change her diaper but as the man it was expected as part of him taking care of her.
“What was that?” Harold turned around with narrowed eyes.
“Nothing.” Anna sighed.
“I thought so.” Harold’s voice dripped with warning, “Your mother is making lunch.”
“I’m not hungry.” Anna replied. In truth she felt nauseous, like all the drama over the last few hours had caught up with her.
“Fine.” Harold replied with a growl before leaving.
Anna was surprised. She had expected Harold to drag her downstairs if necessary but he had just given up and walked away. Anna wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth though. She sat back on the edge of her barred crib and sighed sadly. It soon became clear why Harold hadn’t been too bothered about whether Anna went down or not, the sounds of laughter and enjoyment drifted up the stairs.
Anna didn’t mind being left out. She opened the drawer that held her old family photo album and reached inside, it wasn’t the album she was taking though. It was something even more forbidden than Anna’s memories of a time and place where women were equal. It was a book. Jane Eyre was considered a classic back where Anna had originally come from but it was banned literature in Sallas. Anna wasn’t even sure how she came into possession of it. Apart from the photo album and herself it was all that survived the car crash. She could only assume it was her mother’s.
When Anna was feeling at her lowest she took heart in the book. She tried to convince herself that she could overcome all the barriers in front of her just as young Jane had done. She ran her fingers over the frayed cover wistfully.
Footsteps on the stairs startled Anna who quickly hid the book underneath her photos. If she was caught with that she would be in serious trouble, literature with a strong female role model was distinctly frowned upon. Anna tried to act as naturally as possible as she closed the door on the cabinet and looked up just in time to see Michelle. She stood in the doorway nervously smiling in at Anna.
“Can I help you?” Anna asked. She tried not to let her impatience come across.
“I… I… I wanted to give you some advice.” Michelle said as she stepped inside. She looked down the hallway for a couple of seconds before closing the door behind her. It was unusual for her to speak unprompted like this.
“I’ve had about all the advice I can take.” Anna said quietly, “I know I have to be a good little wife.”
“It’s actually about that…” Michelle said. She nervously played with her hands as she sat on the edge of the bed next to Anna.
Anna sighed and glanced down at the cabinet to make sure everything that should’ve been hidden was covered up. More than anything she wanted to be alone but she didn’t have the heart to kick her mother out of the room. It was clear she had something to impart, perhaps in this society this was a big moment for a mother.
“I need you to make sure you properly dispense your marital duties.” Michelle said without looking at Anna. Her cheeks were reddening.
“M-Marital duties?” Anna felt her face drain of colour. She wasn’t stupid, she knew what Michelle meant but facing up to that was almost too scary to contemplate. It wasn’t something she had allowed herself to think about too much.
“I know you are a bit more… independently minded than others.” It was as if such words were dirty as they came out of Michelle’s mouth. It was like the words themselves were offensive, “You are Ryan’s now and, well, I can’t protect you anymore.”
“Protect me?” Anna repeated. She wasn’t able to hide the anger in her voice, “When have you ever protected me!?”
“Your twelfth birthday.” Michelle started immediately, “You wanted a games console and your father bought you a play kitchen set. You threw such a tantrum. You smashed up that kitchen, I still sometimes find little bits of plastic around as I clean… Did you know your father was on hold with the re-education department before I managed to calm him down?”
Anna swallowed. She had remembered that event and her father’s furious reaction to it but hadn’t known how close she had been to being sent away. She looked down at her feet.
“Last year.” Michelle continued, “Do you remember when you bought your father the wrong brandy? I had to work overtime on that one…”
“Just because I got the wrong brandy?” Anna asked with a frown.
“Honey, I’ve tried to shelter you but you aren’t under our control anymore.” Michelle put her arm around Anna, “You MUST settle down and be a wife. If he wants you to cook something, you have to do it. If he wants you to buy something, do it. If he wants something special in the bedroom…”
“Mom!” Anna waved her hands in front of her and shook her head, “I don’t need to hear this.”
“I think you do.” Michelle replied, “You will be Ryan’s responsibility and he can send you away for any small reason. I just want you to be good and happy.”
Anna nodded her head and looked down at the floor. In her opinion there was no such thing as “good and happy” there was only “good” or “happy.” If she did as she was told she was sure she wouldn’t be happy and if she did what made her happy she was sure she wouldn’t be considered good.
“Make sure you come down for dinner.” Michelle finally said when Anna remained silent.
Anna let her adoptive mother hug her and then leave. Anna understood exactly what Michelle was telling her. Anna knew that she had to behave though she had never known how much Michelle had saved her growing up. She shivered as she thought about being sent away for re-education as a teenager or younger. There was another warning there as well though. Anna knew what happened on the wedding night and she had to assume Ryan would want to consummate. He had asked for her after all, he must’ve thought she was attractive. She swallowed nervously.
The next few hours for Anna were both boring and full of tension. She stayed in her room and barely moved from her crib. She felt like she had hearing like some kind of prey animal, she was hyper-focused on hearing footsteps or anything that might signify someone approaching.
“Anna!” Harold’s voice boomed several hours later, “Dinner.”
Anna stood up and swallowed her nervousness. Her diaper hung low on her body, she had wet herself several times and would certainly need a change before bed though even that filled her with fear. It was now Ryan’s job to change her. It was both humiliating and scary, she would be left incredibly vulnerable in front of him. She would be helpless against whatever desires her new husband might have.
By the time Anna reached the dining room table everyone else was already sat down. Michelle and Harold were sat opposite each other at the square table. The free seat was nearest the doorway whilst Ryan was opposite. He was smiling and listening as Harold droned on about some experience he had on the golf course. Anna sat down and immediately looked down at her food.
“Don’t forget your bib.” Harold grunted.
Anna closed her eyes as the familiar shame washed over her. She stood back up and walked over to the drawer that was full of bibs. She felt like a toddler as she snatched one up and returned to her seat. She couldn’t look at Ryan as she put it over her head and let it drop down round her neck.
It was awkward. Anna felt scarcely able to look up from her food and could feel Ryan watching her. Michelle was a good cook but the food tasted bland to Anna. She just focused on trying to make herself a chameleon and blend into the background. She bitterly thought this was exactly what her mom had advised her to do.
“I certainly hope you’re as good a cook as your mother.” Ryan said as Harold chuckled.
Anna felt herself freeze. Ryan was talking to her and she had no idea what to say or do. Her fork hung halfway to her mouth and her hand trembled a little. The seconds seemed to stretch on and everyone looked at her waiting for a response. This was her husband talking to her, it was practically the first thing he had said to her. Underneath the table Anna felt a gentle kick coming from her mother’s direction.
“I’ve learnt a thing or two.” Anna finally mumbled.
“She’s just being humble!” Harold quickly spoke up, “Michelle has been teaching her all her techniques for cleaning and cooking. Isn’t that right, Anna?”
Anna quietly but quickly nodded her head. She despised her father for acting like a salesperson, she wanted to speak up and tell him that he had already got rid of her and didn’t need to talk about her as if she was a used car he was trying to get rid of. Maybe before the warning from her mother she would’ve opened her mouth.
Anna was relieved when the conversation moved back to matters she had no interest in or knowledge of. Harold and Ryan conversed whilst the two women sat in silence. When Anna finally finished eating she put her knife and fork down. She was the last to finish.
“Ryan, why don’t you come through and see some of our old home movies.” Harold said as she leaned back in his chair, “Anna will do the dishes.”
It wasn’t a suggestion or a question. It was an order and Anna knew it. Her fists clenched as she stood up. This felt impossible, every little thing seemed to push her to the edge of snapping, how was she supposed to go through life like this? Maybe submission was a learned trait.
Anna remained seated at the table as the other three went through to the living room. She should’ve been thankful because it meant she had some time alone but she couldn’t help but feel slighted. She sighed and collected the cutlery for washing. She scrubbed the plates and tried to take out her frustrations, by the time she was finished her hands were wrinkled from the water.
Once she was finished Anna snuck back upstairs. She had no interest in being called in to join the others. She went back up to her bedroom to continue her anxious waiting for that evening. By now her diaper was soaked but she wasn’t about to go and ask for a change. She distracted herself from her increasingly uncomfortable diaper by thinking about what was coming that night.
Anna was a virgin. In fact she hadn’t so much as held hands with a boy. She knew males were dangerous and had spent her whole life avoiding them. The idea that she was to be de-flowered in the next few hours scared her. She had no idea what it was like to have sex but she knew it was coming. She could feel the butterflies taking flight but she remembered her mom’s words, she had to be a good little wife no matter how much she hated it.
As the sky outside grew darker Anna knew it was only a matter of time. She had expected Ryan to come up sooner rather than later, he hadn’t even seen the room he was to be staying in until he went to college.
When Anna heard footsteps on the stairs her pulse quickened. She shifted slightly on the edge of the mattress and watched the door intently. The footsteps went right up to the bedroom door and then stopped. Anna held her breath and felt like her heart might explode from the tension. The handle turned slowly before the door opened. The door creaked as it slowly swung open. Ryan was stood on the other side and he stepped into the room.
Anna stared at him. She hoped he felt like an intruder because that’s how she thought of him. He closed the door behind him and then looked around. He seemed to be avoiding Anna’s glare as he walked over to the other side of the room, he picked up some trinkets Anna had collected over the years and turned them over to look at them. The silence in the room was oppressive.
“This is nice.” Ryan said as he looked at a small ceramic statue of a kitten playing with a ball, “Where did you get it?”
Anna didn’t know how to respond. She hadn’t expected casual conversation and wasn’t sure what she should say. She was torn between the sarcastic hostility that was bubbling right under the surface and being nice. Her mother’s words rang in her ears. She didn’t know what Ryan was like, she didn’t know what he would do if she started mouthing off. She settled for silence.
Ryan turned to look at Anna when she didn’t respond. Anna saw that he wasn’t looking as confident as he had downstairs or when they were on the stage getting married. He opened his mouth like he was just about to say something when there was a knock at the door.
“Come in.” Anna and Ryan called out together.
The door opened and Harold came in. He was dragging a large foldout bed with him. He leaned it against the wall and then brought in a mattress as well. Finally he brought in the sheets and pillows.
“You won’t want to sleep in the crib.” Harold said as he let go of the mattress, “You can get her to set this up for you.”
“Thank you, Mr. Abbott.” Ryan said
“Harold.” Anna’s father replied, “Call me Harold, I insist.”
“Of course.” Ryan replied. Anna noticed his face was going a little red as if that little faux pas embarrassed him as much as everything else embarrassed Anna. Harold turned to face his daughter and the warm smile he had for Ryan disappeared.
“Be good.” Harold growled.
Anna glared back until Harold turned and left the room closing the door behind him. Again the bedroom fell into silence. Ryan looked down at the folding bed and then over to Anna who was just waiting for the order.
Anna could feel herself trembling slightly. At any moment Ryan was going to start demanding that she service him and she had no right to refuse, she would have to do it. She hadn’t ever seen a man naked let alone pleasured one. She wasn’t sure she would even know what to do. Sweat was appearing on her forehead as she desperately tried to remain calm.
“Well, I guess… Maybe you should…” Ryan stuttered and then cleared his throat. He straightened his back and put some more authority in his voice, “Set up the bed for me.”
Anna swallowed her immediate reaction which was to tell Ryan to go to hell. She stood up and walked across to the bed. She could feel Ryan’s eyes on her as she started opening the metal frame. She bent down low to fiddle with the clips. Even with her back to her husband she could feel his eyes on her.
“You need a diaper change.” Ryan said from behind her.
Anna froze and felt herself becoming embarrassed. She pulled her dress down to cover her soaked diaper and continued setting up the bed without saying a word. She was trying not to let panic consume her. She had been ordered to do something for her new husband as if she was some kind of maid or servant. The thought that the rest of her life might be like this was enough to cause anxiety to crush down upon her.
Once the bed was set up and Anna had put all the sheets on she straightened up to return to the edge of her crib. Ryan put an arm out to stop her. She bit her lip nervously as he stood in front of her like a roadblock. Anna couldn’t look up at him, she was just too embarrassed and humiliated not to mention trying desperately hard to keep herself together.
“You should get up on the changing table.” Ryan said.
“I could ju-” Anna started.
“Now.” Ryan interrupted.
Anna had tears in her eyes but she couldn’t disobey Ryan. He was her superior, he basically owned her. With a meek nod of the head Anna turned to the changing table and climbed up on it, she didn’t want to be punished on this first night, it might be too much for her to take. She undressed herself and dropped the clothes on the floor.
Anna was trembling as she laid back. Ryan stood between her legs at the foot of the table and looked his wife up and down. Anna felt like a piece of meat being inspected at the butchers. Her diaper was soaked, she knew that, what she didn’t know was how Ryan would handle it. She was used to her father and teachers changing her, this was new and scary.
Ryan reached forwards and placed his hands on Anna’s diaper. His touch was softer than she had imagined, it was like he was going out of his way to not hurt her. It was possible he was just really inexperienced though males his age often got some tutoring on this.
The diaper slackened as the tapes were pulled off the front. There was a short delay and then the front of the diaper was lowered down and laid on the changing table between Anna’s legs. She had her head turned to the side so she could avoid Ryan’s eyes but she couldn’t help glancing over. It seemed like it was possible his face was just as red as hers.
“I… I erm…” Ryan was staring down at Anna’s crotch. For a few seconds he seemed frozen.
“Wipes?” Anna suggested.
“I know!” Ryan exclaimed, “I was just looking at…”
As Ryan pulled some wipes out of the tub on the shelf Anna felt her foot twitching. This all felt so wrong, she knew what would be expected of her next. Michelle had warned her what was going to happen. Her heart thumped at the prospect. She jumped suddenly as the cold wipes were placed against her nether regions. Ryan pulled his hand away quickly as if he thought he had hurt her.
“Just… cold.” Anna muttered shamefully.
Ryan placed the wipes against Anna again. Anna tried not to react as this stranger cleaned her most private areas. She had the instinctual urge to just lash out and punch Ryan but she kept those instincts at bay until he was done and dropped the wipes into the open diaper.
“Well, I mean, it’s our wedding night…” Ryan reached up with one hand and put it on the back of his neck.
Anna closed her eyes as her stomach sank past her knees. Ryan had stepped back from the changing table allowing Anna to sit up and drop off the edge. Her heart was racing as she was filled with nervousness, curiosity and maybe the tiniest hint of excitement. She was a virgin and like all young people a certain amount of her time was devoted to thinking about sex even if it was never this exact scenario.
Anna was naked in front of this man. Her classmate and acquaintance who was now her husband. She couldn’t help but reach up with one arm to cover her breasts whilst the other went down to her crotch. Ryan pulled his shirt off and Anna saw that he had a fairly toned body, he was no bodybuilder but it was clear he was fit.
Ryan awkwardly stepped forwards until he was stood right in front of Anna. He reached out his hands and placed them on Anna’s arms. He hesitantly pulled her forward into a hug, Anna remained as stiff as a board as she felt her husband’s arms wrap around her. She inhaled his masculine scent and turned her head to the side. She could hear his heart thumping quickly.
“Have you ever done this before?” Ryan asked. The authority that had been in his voice earlier had evaporated.
“No.” Anna quietly replied.
“OK, well, I guess it’s a first time for both of us.” Ryan said as he released the hug and took a step back.
Anna wasn’t sure what to do. It seemed like Ryan was waiting for her to take the initiative which felt like adding insult to injury when she really didn’t want to be doing any of this. She heard Michelle’s words echoing around her head and she sniffed back the tears that threatened to come. She stepped forwards and knelt down in front of Ryan. She reached up with a trembling hand to lower the zip on Ryan’s pants.
Just as Anna was about to pull Ryan’s pants down he stepped back. Anna looked up in confusion. Ryan turned around to face away from Anna as he pulled the zip back up. Anna felt worried. Had she done something wrong? Was she about to be punished? She heard that men liked what she had been about to do, had she been wrong?
“Actually, I think we should just head to bed.” Ryan said. His voice seemed shaky and he was refusing to turn around to look at Anna.
“Are you…” Anna started. She secretly felt very relieved but it seemed like it would be wrong to make it obvious.
“Yeah, it’s been a long day.” Ryan yawned in an exaggerated way, “I think we should… Yeah, let’s head to bed.”
When Ryan finally turned around Anna could see that he was very red in the face. She was curious at the sudden turnaround but didn’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth. She stood back up and covered herself with her hands as much as she could. She backed up to the changing table but Ryan was busying himself with the sheets on his bed and doing everything he could to avoid looking at Anna.
Quite suddenly Ryan climbed underneath the covers and laid down. Anna frowned. She really didn’t understand Ryan at all, he was acting so strangely. There was a problem with Ryan’s sudden decision to head straight to bed though.
“Um, I kind of need a new diaper…” Anna said after a minute of standing at the changing table unsure of what to do.
“Right…” Ryan climbed out of bed again.
Anna lifted herself on to the table and laid back. If there had been a little awkwardness before it was now impossible to miss. Anna was powdered and diapered in silence and then as soon as the tapes had been placed Ryan went back to his bed, laid down and faced the wall. Anna watched him with a curious frown.
When it became obvious he wasn’t getting back up Anna slipped off the changing table with a plethora of crinkles. She went over to her crib and climbed in. After a moment’s hesitation she grabbed the railings and lifted them up herself. She didn’t normally have the side up and she certainly didn’t like it but it felt like a protective barrier. She looked out through the bars at Ryan until she eventually fell into an uneasy sleep.