The Journal of June Summers

Chapter 6
Week 6

Chapter Description: June now has to tell her grandchildren about the virus. What shall she say and how will the kids respond? Also, she's making friends with one of the patients in Dr. Kurtos's meeting.

Sunday

April 17, 2011

Easter Sunday

This is the sixth week since my AR virus and a lot of things have changed for me. One minute I was on top of the world, the next minute I found out that my regression would stop just on second after I would be conceived. Oh how the tides turn in my part. I mean think about it, the fact that would be inside someone’s stomach and would have no memories of my past life is really haunting. I mean not only do I have to prepare for the inevitable, but I would also have to plan for everything. I need to write down my last will and testament, give my money away, sell my house, remove all my personal belongings, it’s going to be a nightmare. Not only that, but I have to find a segregate mother that would take me in and raise me all over again. That’s going to be a mess for me. Since I can’t use my own daughter to be my mother, I have to find someone else. I hope I find one soon or this regression will make things worse for me.

In the meantime, I have to continue living this normal life. I still have things to do and my bucket list needs to be crossed out. Not to mention I still have my one-month membership at the gym to get my regressing body back into shape. Can’t get too worked up on this news in front of everyone. It would be too much for them. Just have to live normally.

Back to today though. It’s Easter Sunday and that means a lot of things. To kids, that means going Easter egg hunting and eating candy. But to adults, it means paying homage to the lord and preying. Being a catholic woman myself, I do believe it’s necessary to prey to the lord about my condition. I headed to a nearby church and started my prayer. I told him in silent about the virus and how it’s affecting me. I told him to guide me and help with my ailing times. I don’t know if he would hear my please, but I know that he would be watching for me. I just hope that he would help me.

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Monday

April 18, 2011

Catalogs

It’s Monday and nothing much is going on with me so far. I don’t have anything to do for today. With my workout not until tomorrow and Kurtos’s group meeting on Wednesday, all I can do is sit in my house and do nothing. Luckily for me, I have something to keep my mind occupied while I’m inside.

For example, I always get mails of clothing catalogs at my door almost everyday. I swear, whoever knows my address should be sued for constant interruptions. But these clothing catalogs would give me the chance to see what I should get if I get any younger. Looking through each catalog, I saw a lot of good clothes for me to wear. There were a wide variety of clothes depending on what age you are. They even have bras and panties of women ages 12 and up. That something I should need if I get younger then twenty and my normal bras won’t fit me no more. Though I got to admit, their teenage fashions are a little over the top. I mean seriously? Most of the fashions look like something those female singers wear and some of them have a little exposure if you know what I mean. Kids these days… At least they have clothes that are suitable to mature teenagers so I guess I would take those instead of the scanty ones.

As far as I know it, I say there some good selections I can choose from. Perhaps when I reach my forties I would start buying them in the mall. But I better do it soon. Judging by the one year a day regression, I could be 52 years of age. And I seem to be looking a little youthful then ever. I still have clothes for my real age, but it would be a matter of time before I start to feel loose on my clothes. So I should get started as soon as I could. In the meantime, I need to get use to what I’m wearing now.

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Tuesday

April 19, 2011

Mother Hunting

Well, got through with the day without any problems. Did my workout twice a day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Not to mention heading to the park for some relaxation and jogging, which I got to admit, I’m getting better then last time. Still, I feel a little on edge with the search for a segregate mother. I still have time to find one, but I don’t know where to begin. I know the first thing was to search for a mother. But that would be too complex to begin with.

I’ve looked at some women that would be nice for being my mother in both the gym and park. There were those that are in their twenties and thirties, some of which has boyfriends or husbands. Even ones with good income judging by the way they look. Still, I don’t know how I should approach it. If you can be in my shoes, telling these women about my virus, when it will stop, and ask if they want to be my segregate mother would be complicated. Here, let me do a little pretend talking to you.

‘Hello miss what’s your name. My name is June Summers and I need to speak to you about something. You see, I have contracted a rare virus known as the AR virus and it’s making regress a year a day. Now the reason why I’m telling you about this is that I need a favor from you. See, my regression would end about one second after I would be conceived. Meaning I would be just a sperm and egg that’s just came together. I was wondering if you could be my segregate mother. I need someone that would raise me and treat me like their own child. If I don’t find a mother to raise me before I reach past birth, I would ultimately die from outside the womb or when I’m a sperm and egg. So will you accept my offer?’

See? That’s the problem I have. If I start to say that to women, they would freak out and run away from me. It’s really hard to do. Even if they would accept me, it would only be a matter of time before they have second thoughts of it. How am I ever going to save myself from the inevitable? I just hope I find someone to be my mother and soon.

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Wednesday

April 20, 2011

Fifth Meeting

Went through with another group meeting with Dr. Kurtos and was the same thing as before. It’s already starting to be natural for me to come there and talk to other AR victims. Speaking of which, there were changes in the other people that I find intriguing.

Once again, I should start with Godfree. His sixth month regression made him look the same, partially the same. Still could be around forty-four and I could see some subtle changes. His back does look straight now and he looks a little healthier then before. Muscle mass is slowly building up and his face does seem to youthen a bit. I could see the creases looking less noticeable and the gray hairs seem to be almost gone. The clothes are still the same, though they look a little thinner then before. Guess he must’ve bought some clothes to fit his thinning body for the past week. I still need to think about getting new clothes myself in the near future. But I know you already know that.

Jessica is much worse the ever, as her regression makes her more of a teenager and less like an adult. Even worse is that her mind was long gone. She was living a carefree life as a teenager and doesn’t remember anything about her past. She doesn’t remember about her wedding with her husband, her job, her college life, not even herself. All she cares about is her time with new friends, talking about boys, and hanging out in popular places for teenagers. This is a sad day for her, a sad day.

Elizabeth’s regression is just the same as Jessica’s. She’s already around twenty and looked the same as before. Though there were some slight differences then last week. She looked a little shorter as before, possibly because she’s starting to relive her last growth spurt, which is what Kurtos says to be a shrunk spurt. I could also see that her body was degrading a little bit. Her breasts seem to be rising a little bit and her curves looked a little compressed. Still, she looks the same. Elizabeth is still having trouble remembering things as she was trying to remember through large amounts of pictures and the like. But it did look the same. But it’s going to be a matter of time before she forgets more of it.

The last person, James Carmen is improving this week. Being that he’s the same age as me and suffering the duration of the AR virus as me, he is now fifty. So that means we are both halfway to a hundred. His weight seems to be less noticeable and the pounds keep on melting away. More hair seems to grow on top of his head and he kept on getting less gray and darker. I could even see his face was youthening as well, the wrinkles seem a little less and his face looked more hardened. Got to admit, he was looking pretty good. He is still old and still fragile, but I’ll give him a few weeks until he’s younger then that.

Once I heard everyone’s story in the week, I told them about myself. I gave them the news that I found out about when this regression will end and told them the bad sides of it. What I said is that my regression will end one second after my conception, which means that I have to find a woman that would be my surrogate mother that would raise me when I’m born. Most of which were shocked by the news while others were a little confused. Jessica herself was going through her mental regression and was a little concerned about this, even if her mentality is on edge. But they did comforted me and told me that everything will be all right.

When the meeting ended and said my goodbyes and leave the place. But before I could leave, James stopped me and told me that he felt sorry about me. I told him that it was all right. I knew there would be risks with this and would accept the consequences. He then asked if we could talk together sometimes so that way we can get through this together. I’m quite surprised that he wants to talk to me about this predicament. I can understand his concerns and maybe it would be a good idea to talk to him about this. So I gave him both and home and cellphone numbers so that way we can talk. He too gave me his own numbers so I could call him. You know what, after what happened to me for the past week, I think I’ve made a friend out of this mess. Let’s hope it will last.

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Thursday

April 21, 2011

Same Old, Same Old

Thursday and still doing the same old thing. With nothing else to do, I decided to go to the gym twice eat someplace healthy, and stay in the park for a while. But so far, nothing special. This gave me some time to think to myself. With this regression in my body, I was completely and utterly scared for my life. At first, I would enjoy these changes, but now it’s the exact opposite. Looking back to the mirror, I could tell that the changes are drastic.

My face looked thin and was beginning to gain some muscles. There is some flabbiness on my arms and legs, but that would soon to pass. My breasts were plumping up and started to giggle, but it looked saggy cause of my old age. I have somewhat of a muffin top around my hips due to poor dieting and having Grace. But, with my work out at the gym, I will remove that flabby gut eventually. My face looks younger then before. The jowls were almost gone and the wrinkles looked almost like faint lines. There was also a little brightness in my eyes as I look less tired then before. Maybe it was because my youth is giving me back the energy I long lost. Guess that’s a real good thing since I rarely get any sleep due to my old age. But whatever the case, I am feeling better about my looks.

Though it might be good to me, it’s also really bad as well. With the regression stopping a second after my conception, I’m scared for my life. When I reach my teenage years, I would begin to forget everything, and when I reach newborn age, I need to surrogate mother to raise me. This is what I’m worried about. Without a mother to raise me, I would die, exposing my lifeless womb. That’s something I don’t want. I am starting to find a woman that would accept my offer, but I don’t know how they would react to that. I still have time from this search. But don’t really know how will I be able to tell them about this. Only time will tell I guess.

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Friday

April 22, 2011

James’s Call

Friday has become one of those sluggish days. With nothing to do outside and the fact that it’s raining out there today, I decided to stay at home and do a little cleaning up around the house and watching some television. Nothing much to do anyways. But as I was cleaning the place, I got an unexpected call from my cell phone. I was curious about who would call me at this time. My first thought was that it might be my daughter since she’s going to bring my grandchildren tomorrow so I could give them the news. But I did look at the caller ID and it was an unknown caller. Curious, I picked it up to see who it is. Saying who it is, I knew the voice on the other line. It was James, the very man who was in the same group meeting with me.

I did give him my cell phone number just so we can talk. I never thought it was going to be that soon. But at least he cared about me and my condition. And believe me, when you have someone like me who has the AR Virus and the regression will stop one second after conception, you would have people worry about me. But still, I never thought that James would be worried the most being that we shared the same virus and how the regression is affecting us.

Anyways, we did talk about somethings. Stuff like how we’re doing, what’s going on, what we’re doing, the usual type of conversations. But then, he told me that he was sorry about what happened to me and worried about the outcome. I told him to stop worrying about me. I know there would be serious risks in all of this and understand the consequences when this is over. But I told him that I’m already working on this situation and finding a surrogate mother so I still have time to do it. When we were about done with the conversation, he asked if we could meet up for lunch on Sunday. I was taken aback by this unexpected event. But be that he was concerned about me; I decided to accept his offer. I mean it’s not like I have anything else to do right? We then said our goodbyes and I hung up soon after that.

I felt glad that he talked to me today and felt a little warm in my heart. But it still won’t change the fact of what would happen to me in the near future. Well, better get ready for tomorrow. Like I said before, my daughter is going to bring my grandchildren to the house. She didn’t tell them anything about what happened to me since I got this virus so this will be their first time seeing me looking a little different. I have to be prepared for what I’m going to say to them. Can’t just be too strict with my words or too serious. Better start writing down what I have to say. Should start right away.

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Saturday

April 23, 2011

Telling the Grandkids

Well, this is it. The day I’m worried about the most. The day the kids will come and see me like this. I haven’t seen my grandchildren in a long time and if they see me like this, they will start to ask some questions. Now I did write down what I had to say to them and reread it a couple of times. After looking through this, I think I did a good job at what I wrote. Nothing too serious or nothing to scary for the kids to listen to. It seems perfect. I just hoped that it wouldn’t make things worse for them.

As I was waiting for my daughter to come, I begin to have many thoughts in my head. What would happen if I tell my grandchildren about this condition I have? What would their reaction be? Will they love me? Will they hate me? Will they still consider me as their grandmother? Those are the types of question that raced inside my head. Just as I was thinking about those questions, I heard my doorbell ringing. That could only mean one thing. Heading to the door, I opened it up and saw my daughter with three of my grand children.

The eldest is my granddaughter Elis Summers. At seventeen years of age, she looked like a splitting image of her mother. She stood at around five feet as she was going through some growing up and her body was looking pretty mature. With BB cup breasts, a slim hourglass, and tones out arms and legs, she was starting to look like one of those young models. Her hair was raven black like Grace and I and her skin complexion is just like her mother’s. The only difference is her eyes. Unlike a pair of brown eyes, there are light blue eyes just like her father. She was wearing a light blue top with the word ‘Hope’ imprinted on the front, a set of dark blue demin knit jeggings, and a pair of light blue flip flops with multiple words on the top.

The middle child is Thomas Summers and he’s 11-years-old. He stood about 4’5 and has a skinny frame for a boy his age. He was also beginning to show signs of puberty taking over him a little bit. One time he told me about gaining a little hair on his arms and legs and his voice started to crack. I could tell that he was beginning to grow into a man. But I know he has a long way to go before he could even be a man. With short ruffled blonde hair and blue eyes, he was a surprising resemblance of his father. He was wearing a gray polo shirt for kids, blue jean shorts that goes below his ankles, and a pair of Nike sneakers.

The last of my grandchildren is the youngest in the family that goes by the name of Megan Summers. She 7-years-old that’s around four feet and is full of energy with flowing blonde hair that’s done up in a ponytail and bright blue eyes. She was wearing a yellow shirt with Spongebob Squarepants logo on it and the character of that show, a Capri skirt that’s down to her knees, and a pair of Spongebob yellow sneakers. She was still a kid, but at least she loves being one. I could imagine how it would be like at that age. So carefree and innocent. I’m pretty sure I’ll reach that age soon.

As the kids got a good look at me, they were surprised at how I look. They saw me many times before, but they didn’t see me this young. They then started to ask questions like what happened to me? Why do I look so young? Did I go to a spa? Did I buy some youth cream? They keep on asking over and over again. So I told them to calm down and explained to them what really happened. Here’s what I said.

I started to tell them that I have a disease that would regress me in age and would continue until it’s done with me. I then said that I’m regressing one year a day and told them that in a few weeks, I might be the same age as them. I didn’t say that when the regression would stop. Didn’t want to scare them then they already are. Though, I don’t think they were scared at all, just a little intrigued. Elis was understandable about me. Being the oldest, she already aware of the AR virus and was studying it in school. Thomas has mixed feelings about it. He was excited that I would play with them when I get younger, but also worried that he doesn’t want to loose me. As for Megan, she was completely ecstatic. Being the youngest, she always has some type of imagination in her head. She always wonder what would it be like for me to be her age so we could play together and it looks like her wish had come true. Kids these days…Anyways, Elis asked me if I’m going to survive the virus’s infection. I don’t want to worry her as it is going to make me stop at one second after conception. So I told her that I would be okay when this is over. I know it’s a simple lie, but I don’t want her to feel bad about this.

Anyways, after a little conversations and how they are doing with schoolwork and such, they all left the house. But before they could leave, my grand children wish me luck on condition. I simply nodded and waved back at them, trying to keep the secret about what’s bound to happen to me in the end. Then my daughter, Grace, came to me and told me that I’ve done a good enough job in letting them know about what’s happening to me. She then closed the door and let herself out. To tell you the truth, I think Grace does have a point. I was able to tell my grandkids about this disease and now I feel much better about it. Sure I kept the big secret in front of the kids, but at least I told them about the virus in me. So yeah, guess that makes my life easier. Still though, I don’t know what’s bound to happen to me in the near future. I mean, when you think about it, I’m still getting younger and soon I have to find a surrogate mother before I reach newborn status. I hope I find someone soon, or I won’t be able to live anymore. Anyways, better get myself ready for tomorrow. I got to meet up with James for lunch and I have to see what he’s going to say to me.