Sam's Crawl To Adulthood

Chapter Description: Sam is preparing for middle school in her continued recovery from her total regression. However, before she can start there, she has to do a few things, not least of which is improving her potty training.

Commissioned by: diaperboy187

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Sam sleepily rolled over and suddenly felt herself falling. She just had time to open her eyes and let out a startled yelp before she hit the floor. Thankfully the cover had already been kicked off the bed so the landing was very soft. She stood up and rubbed her padded rear end which had taken a majority of the impact. It turned out that after so long in a crib getting used to not having bars was proving a little tricky.

Standing up and sleepily rubbing her eyes Sam reached down to assess her diaper. It was wet which was no surprise. No matter what progress she had made potty training she hadn’t made any in-roads into what happened when she was asleep. She stretched and her pink princess nightie was pulled up slightly.

Knowing that she wasn’t supposed to leave her room until Isabelle came to get her she decided to walk over to the dollhouse on the other side of the room and play for a little bit. Some habits die hard and as embarrassed as she was to play like a little girl she couldn’t deny it kept her occupied, not to mention playing with the these toys was a lot better than the mindless baby ones she had been used to.

Isabelle walked in a little later and saw Sam sitting with the dolls dressing one in an elegant ball gown. She walked over to the changing table and started getting the supplies out as she always did. Sam waddled over and lifted her arms to allow the taller woman to lay her on her back and start the process. She was feeling a little tense though, it was the Monday after her final day at elementary school and she wondered if that meant she would be taking her next step that day. Isabelle hadn’t said anything about it and she definitely didn’t feel prepared to go to a school with bigger kids.

Isabelle completed the diaper change without saying a word which might’ve given a hint of what was coming next. She dressed Sam in a creamy yellow shirt and matching skirt which went down to Sam’s knees. She then lifted Sam down from the table and led the way downstairs. Sam noted that the living room door was closed which was unusual but she thought little of it as she was taken to the dining table for breakfast.

“What am I doing today?” Sam asked as her cereal was placed in front of her. She still felt that small bit of pride that she was entrusted to feed herself.

“I’ll show you after breakfast.” Isabelle replied.

Sam was curious and so made an effort to eat as fast as possible. Unfortunately the rather predictable result of that was some of her food spilled on to her shirt thanks to her still underdeveloped skills with the cutlery. Fortunately it seemed Isabelle didn’t see that happen or she may well have brought out a bib.

Once breakfast was over Sam eagerly hurried to the living room door. Isabelle turned the handle and opened it allowing Sam to finally see what was going to happen next. What Sam saw was the potty she had used before starting elementary school and a colourful chart on the wall. Thanks to her efforts in class she was able to read some of it.

“Potty tra-… trai-...” Sam said slowly.

“It’s a potty training chart.” Isabelle said.

Sam felt her shoulders slump slightly. She was nervous about the chart, and having it keep track of her failures, but more than that she was a little irritated by Isabelle. She would’ve been able to say “training” is Issy had just given her a little bit more time. Unfortunately her caregiver had little patience for these sorts of things.

“Whilst you have undoubtedly made progress recent events show more effort is needed.” Isabelle stated.

Sam bristled a little at the use of the word “effort.” She had been putting in plenty of effort. It wasn’t her fault if her body was being slow to learn what to do when she needed the potty.  She was trying her best.

Despite feeling a little annoyed she was more than happy to take a small break the next part of her progression. The last day of elementary school had shown that despite feeling more confident and that she belonged with the bigger boys and girls she was still deficient in a lot of ways. Her potty training was the most obvious, especially after rumours about her diapers circulated. The rather explosive exclamation point she put on her stay in elementary school showed a need to continue training.

For the next week Sam trained hard. Every successful trip to the potty earned her a smiling sun sticker on her chart whereas every failure was a raincloud. There were plenty of times where she would be grasping the front of her diaper with her hands and desperately calling for Isabelle only to fail at the last second. Her bladder remained the biggest issue. No matter how hard she tried she just couldn’t hold her urine in for long enough, even as her bowels got stronger she remained in wet diapers more often than they were dry.

Sam didn’t let herself get too disheartened. As frustrated as she got she made sure to celebrate small milestones. Every time she got a little closer to making it to the potty she gave herself a pat on the back.

It was humiliating. A woman in her twenties being forced to go through such embarrassing training, she reckoned she must be alone in that regard. Either way she had to stay focused on getting better, if she started feeling sorry for herself she knew it was a slippery slope leading to her sinking back into her regressed ways. All of this was why, four days into the training something quite significant happened.

Sam was in the living room playing with some stuffed toys when she felt a twinge in her bladder. She didn’t hesitate but immediately climbed to her feet and covered the front of her padding with her hands. She crossed her legs and looked up to Isabelle who was reading a book on the couch.

“Issy! Issy!” Sam squealed, “Potty! Potty!”

The little training potty was kept right next to Sam. Isabelle sprung up and hurried over, the fairy pink onesie Sam was wearing was designed to snap open easily so Sam could get her diaper taken off in time. As she waited and bit her lip a small squirt of urine entered the padding. Suddenly the diaper was pulled away and Sam practically fell back on to the potty.

A second after her skin hit the plastic edge of the potty she lost control completely. Sam’s bladder gave way and she started peeing uncontrollably. The main difference was that this time it wasn’t warming her underwear!

As the sound of Sam’s urine tinkled against the potty and splashed down into a puddle at the bottom she couldn’t help but clap her hands and look up at Isabelle. For once the usually flat caretaker was genuinely smiling as she looked down at Sam. The smile, something quite rare for Isabelle, made all the struggling feel worth it.

“I did it!” Sam squealed happily as she used her potty.

“Well done.” Isabelle reached a hand down and tussled Sam’s hair, “I’m proud of you.”

Sam felt so delighted by Isabelle’s words she nearly burst into happy tears. She felt so big, it was the first time in what felt like forever that she wasn’t wetting herself. As her small stream trickled to a stop she quickly stood up and looked down at her achievement.

“Careful!” Isabelle said quickly. Her tone quickly returning to what Sam was used to.

Sam had finished peeing but she had some urine on her upper thighs that trickled down as well as dripping between her legs. Rather embarrassingly Isabelle collected a handful of nearby baby wipes and started wiping Sam clean. It was somehow MORE embarrassing after successfully using the potty than it was whilst getting her diaper changed.

After a couple of weeks progress had been made… but it hadn’t been enough. Sam could make it to the potty sometimes but other times she would lose control earlier and flood her diaper. It was frustrating and there were several times that Isabelle had to settle Sam down after a tantrum. So one day, that seemed like any other, Sam was sat in the living room looking bored with the potty next to her. She was idly colouring when Isabelle walked in.

“I’ve just got off the phone with Mr. O’Shea and they have a space for you but only if you start on Monday.” Isabelle said. She bit her lip as she looked at the potty and then back to Sam, “And I worry the longer you are away from school the more likely you’ll slip back into bad habits…”

Sam blushed. She didn’t want to admit it but she thought Isabelle might be right. As she sat around the house all day playing it seemed easy to forget what the goal of all this was supposed to be. It became easier for her to slip backwards and act more childish. That said, Monday was only a couple of days away and Sam didn’t feel at all ready. She had been humiliated in elementary school and those kids had been her size, the kids she would be around next would be bigger than her in more ways than one.

“Which means we need to stock up on supplies.” Isabelle said, “We’ll have to go to the mall. I’ll just get ready.”

“Today!?” Sam exclaimed in response.

“I’d rather get it done today than leave everything to the last minute.” Isabelle replied simply. Clearly the matter was not up for discussion.

“But…” Sam started but Isabelle had already left the room to start getting things ready.

Sam felt her nerves spike. It felt like this was going to be a big deal. After two weeks of never being more than a few feet away from the potty she was going to be taken outside. She found herself thinking “thank god for my diapers” as she waddled into the hallway. She was dressed in a light blue t-shirt that had a popular cartoon princess on the front and a skirt which went down to her knees. Skirts had been preferable to shorts or pants recently as they made getting to the potty slightly easier. Her Velcro shoes were slipped on to her feet and with her tummy full of butterflies she stepped through the front door behind Isabelle.

The mall was much the same as Sam remembered it from her first trip. She had bad memories of her trigger being accidentally used and prayed it wouldn’t happen again, she had avoided the regression suggestions for a little while and felt they might be slightly weakening. She bit her lip nervously as they parked the car and Isabelle helped her out of the seat.

“I don’t know about this…” Sam muttered as Isabelle locked the car up.

“It’ll be fine.” Isabelle replied, “Just let me know if you need the potty.”

Sam cringed slightly but walked behind Isabelle into the mall. It was even more crowded than the first time they had gone with the Saturday afternoon shoppers filling the wide open space. Sam’s little legs moved quicker to keep up with Isabelle’s longer stride as the pair of them returned to the same clothing store as last time. Thankfully they didn’t travel all the way to the little kids section and instead stopped next to some slightly more mature looking clothes.

“It’s all too big for me…” Sam said sadly as she looked at some of the more fashionable numbers.

“Don’t worry about that.” Isabelle said, “I have a friend who will be able to help tomorrow. Right, let’s see…”

For the next few minutes Isabelle took clothes from the rack and put them in the cart. Sam watched each one to offer her opinions though it didn’t seem like Isabelle was listening to her too much. In Sam’s view Isabelle’s choices were far too conservative. She tried to suggest some other clothes that looked a little more mature such as a low-cut shirt or one that had a rather racy message on it but Isabelle shook her head each time leaving Sam pouting.

In Sam’s opinion the clothes were boring but at least they weren’t so overly childish. Although they were safe picks she had to admit she was happy that most of it looked pretty grown up. She was certainly looking forward to ditching the childish princess shirts she had grown used to and getting something a little more mature. She was a little concerned about how big a lot of the clothes were though. Although they were the smallest size they still looked like they would be far too big on her.

It was as they joined the end of a short queue for the cash register that she felt a problem. Her tummy had been acting up from the nerves of being away from the potty but now she realised there was something else going on. Despite all the people around her Sam knew it was important to get Isabelle’s attention.

“Issy! Issy!” Sam urgently said. She tried to keep her voice low but it was difficult with the heightened state of her nerves, “I need to go to the potty!”

Sam’s face blazed as she saw people look at her oddly. She could hardly blame them, she may have been small but up till then she had been acting entirely normally. No doubt they were taken aback by the suddenly childish display.

“Can you wait?” Isabelle asked.

Sam was almost certain she couldn’t. With her face quickly turning red she shook her head. She had become aware that her bladder was full as well, her legs trembled as she put her hands on her lower tummy.

Sam saw Isabelle gaze from her suddenly desperate form to the cashier and then the entrance of the store. They both knew the bathroom was quite some way away, though neither said anything it was clear they both thought that even if they ran as fast as they could right away that Sam would never make it.

“You’ll just have to use your diaper.” Isabelle finally said quite brusquely, “We’ll sort you out afterwards.”

Sam let out a whine. It was inevitable she was going to use her diaper regardless. The people around them were watching her, most saw a little kid struggling with potty training but that didn’t help Sam. They looked distinctly uncomfortable, as if they could already smell what was coming and were annoyed at the inconvenience. Sam felt like she should walk around and apologize to all of them for what she was about to do.

Sam didn’t think Isabelle would be so blunt and loud. Now Sam wished she hadn’t said anything. It would’ve been much less embarrassing. She was about to open her mouth to complain that Isabelle was supposed to be potty training her but before she could get a word out she felt her bladder give way. Her hands were on the front of her clothes and she could feel the diaper warming underneath. It was the least of her concerns though.

The pee had barely stopped when Sam felt her bowels opening without her control. In an automatic motion she bent her knees and squatted down. She covered her face as she felt the familiar pushing sensation in her tummy. A second later she could feel a sticky mass emerging into her diaper. She shuddered and held her breath and felt the slimy logs rub against her skin on their way out. She felt like she was failing her potty training, she felt more ashamed of using this diaper than any other. She was better than this! She should’ve made it to the potty!

Isabelle unexpectedly moved forwards and as Sam moved she felt her stinky waste spreading against her butt. She sniffed despondently as she looked at the floor. She had been doing so well, real progress seemed to be happening but now she was back in a wet and stinky diaper as if nothing had changed. The smell was already starting to permeate the air and nearby people were backing off a little bit more. Somewhere above her Sam heard Isabelle let out a deep sigh of frustration.

Sam kept her eyes to the ground as the line moved slowly forwards and Isabelle paid for the goods. She was too ashamed to say anything and could only focus on the sticky and slimy feeling in her diaper. It seemed to take an age for the sale to finalize but it was with relief that Issy took Sam’s hand and led her from the store.

“You couldn’t wait then?” Isabelle asked irritably.

“I tried!” Sam whined in reply.

“I thought you had that side of things under control.” Isabelle said, “Didn’t you feel the need to go?”

“I… I thought it was just because I was scared about coming here.” Sam sighed, “I didn’t realise the feeling was… that.”

Isabelle was leading Sam towards the public toilets and the baby changing room next to them. She was walking fairly quickly which was forcing Sam to nearly have to jog to keep up. Every step seemed to spread her accident just a little more.

“Maybe middle school is too much.” Isabelle said as she pushed open the door for Sam to waddle inside, “Perhaps you need more potty training.”

“No!” Sam quickly stated. She surprised herself with how vehement she was, “This was just an accident!”

“But what if it happens at school again?” Isabelle asked.

Sam thought about it. Having her messy accident on the final day of elementary school had been mortifying but doing it in middle school sounded like it would be even worse. If it wasn’t on the final day she would have to face those kids again, and they would be older than the last ones, bigger and potentially meaner. But on the flipside, she couldn’t remain scared forever. If she wanted to get better she had to face these things head on.

“It won’t.” Sam stated forcefully, “I need to grow up and… and I think your plan is working.”

Isabelle looked down at Sam with lips pressed tightly together. It was almost like she was a robot analyzing every little bit of data to come up with a mathematical solution. Finally she relented.

“Fine.” Isabelle said, “I believe in you.”

Despite the dirty diaper and the scary situation on the horizon Sam couldn’t help a small smile appearing on her face. Isabelle leaned down and for a second Sam thought she was going for a hug, instead of that she was lifted into the air and sat on the edge of the changing table. Sam’s closed tightly and she winced as she felt the poop in her pants spread out.

“There is one thing we can do to help you though.” Isabelle said as she looked down at Sam, “We can teach you to change your own diapers…”

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