Sisterhood of the Thickening Pants

Chapter 7
Hatching a Plan

Chapter Description: Jessica and her new friend Adam set their plan into motion to give the daycare worker, Lisa, a hell of a time.

Adam raised an eyebrow, "What did you have in mind then? We're only like 2 here, it's not like we can do much."

Jessica raised one finger in the air, "I have a question fow you, deaw Adam. Do the kids get some kind of snack with juice ow something, and if so how is it administewed?"

Adam kept his eyebrow raised, "Well, usually it's lemonade or apple juice or something like that. They keep a pitcher in the fridge, and put it all in sippy cups and give it to us. Why?"

Jessica grinned again, "When I was in my twenties, I wowked in a daycawe centew. And they always kept baby laxative awound fow when a kid was constipated. My fwiend, we'we going to give Lisa a bunch of diapews to change all at once."

Adam gasped, "But isn't that mean? What about all the other kids? And couldn't we just give it to Lisa herself and make her stuck on the toilet for a while?"

Jessica shook her head, "That's not good enough. You know how annoying it is when she goes awound checking fow someone who pooped theiw pants, let's give hew something to check fow!"

Adam lowered his head, "Okay, but what about us? Are we supposed to look like we're immune to this random "stomach virus" going around or what?"

Jessica shook her head, "We can't do that, we have to look like we caught it too, othewise we look suspicious. Now come on, follow me."

She grabbed Adam by the hand and pulled him toward the kitchen, keeping an eye on Lisa, who was leading a three year old to the bathroom. It was the perfect time. The two almost stumbled over each other various times, their legs still not used to their thick undergarments.

"Keep watch fow me." She demanded. Adam nodded uneasily and looked out toward the room. Jessica surveyed the kitchen as she thought. Her eyes fell on a cabinet near the floor that said "medicine" on it. Paydirt, she thought, as she toddled toward it. Upon pulling on it, though, it wouldn't open. Duh, it's got a toddler lock. How do these work again? she thought as she leaned onto the cabinet before pulling in frustration. Adam came over and yanked with her. The door opened with ease. Oh, that's how. She poked her head in, looking through the various bottles and liquids. Baby aspirin, regular aspirin, it seemed like a veritable smorgasbord of remedies.

Finally, her eyes fell on it. Baby laxative. And it was liquid. She turned and toddled over to the refrigerator. With great effort she managed to swing the door open enough to poke her body inside. A large pitcher of juice stood on the bottom shelf; its top open, almost inviting. She popped the top off the clear liquid and poured it into the pitcher right as she heard Adam's panicked voice,

"Lisa's coming!" He whispered. Jessica turned toward the trash can a few feet from her and hail mary threw the empty laxative bottle toward it. It landed perfectly inside just as Lisa turned the corner.

"Adam, Jessica, what're you two doing in the kitchen, it's not snacktime!" She patronized yet again with her hands on her hips. Adam ran off toward the playroom as Jessica sank into her body,

"I jus' wanted juice." Jessica tried to act more infantile than usual. Lisa sank down to her level with her hands on her knees,

"Aww, it's okay sweetie, you'll get juice soon. But you can't be coming in here without me, okay? It's not safe in here."€ She ruffled Jessica's hair.

Jessica looked up slightly, "Otay." She toddled off back to the playroom where Adam was. Adam continued to work on his drawing.

"What the hell was that?!" Jessica whispered to him, "You just let me take the blame!"

Adam blushed, "I'm sorry, I got scared!"

Jessica sighed, "Well, now we play the waiting game."

The kids continued to pretend to play to pass the time. Jessica and Adam got to know each other, what their past lives were like, and what their home lives were like now that they were little.

"Ugh, it's so weird not being able to eat ow dwink gwown up food." Jessica complained, "You know what I miss? Wine. Can't dwink it any mowe, stuck with gwape juice."

Adam tilted his head back, "Ugh, I know. And my wife doesn't even let me watch the shows I used to like anymore. Says I need to grow my brain. But I remember everything from when I was grown up, what do I need to be watching Nick Jr. for?"

Jessica raised an eyebrow, "Weiwd, my sistew doesn't cawe what I watch. Maybe you could come ovew and we could watch Bweaking Bad ow something gwown up?" Adam nodded in agreement.

Just then, Lisa entered the room with a tray of sippy cups. "Okay kids, snack time!" She handed each child a cup and a few animal crackers. Adam and Jessica took theirs and looked at each other. The time of reckoning was upon them. They toasted their sippy cups, and took a drink. Here we go. Jessica thought.