Chapter Description: With Johnny's training nearly complete, his mother takes him to a special sort of party!
I wake up still feeling like swimming in warm water. There is pressure on my bladder, but I don’t want to stand up so I let go, knowing my night-time-training-pants will hold it or mommy will take care of it. While my groin grows warm I look around, discovering Skully next to me. I take my friend close.
"Yesterday I swum," I tell him, while he sits on my chest "The water was deep and deep, but I was not afraid. Nh-Nh. In the summer we go beach and be pirates. Sailing. Battles. Finding treasures."
Skully seems to be very interested, so I smile and kick my legs in the air, removing the blanket.
"Well well," a voice comes from above. "Someone seems to be quite awake already."
Looking up I discover mommy looking down on me and give her a wide smile. She returns the smile then she pulls back the blanket and the top of my night-time-pajama, making blueberries on my stomach. I squirm and giggle wildly during this attack and when she finally lets go I am out of breath.
"You made a little tinkle during the night?" Mommy asks as she lifts me up and places me in her arms.
I don’t reply, but rest my head on her shoulder, sucking my thumb. Dreaming about the sea was good, but this is better. Mommy puts socks with lions on my feet and then brings me in the kitchen where she undresses me except for my socks and cleans my groin with soft wipes. They are supposed for toddlers who potty-train, but I guess they are not such different from baby-wipes. Then she makes me sit on the potty and I almost instantly make a bit of ca-ca and some pee-pee, too, without so much as thinking of it. When she has cleaned me again, we go to the bathroom where she empties the potty in the grown-up potty.
"Say bye-bye pee-pee, bye-bye ca-ca Johnny!"
"Bye-bye pee-pee, bye-bye ca-ca," I say smiling, even waving.
Mommy smiles proudly on me and presses the flush-button, then she cleans the potty and we brush out teeth. Once done and still wearing only my socks I race back to my room where I begin playing with my fire-truck and some blocks sitting on the ground. A little later mommy calls me from the door.
Instantly I stand up and want to run past her, but mommy catches me and lifts me in the air. I laugh in protest and she effortlessly puts the training-pants on me. Then she carries me to the diaper-training-chart.
"One earned a star yesterday," mommy says.
I smile. It is good mommy thinks about thus, because I already had forgotten it. With all the things having happened yesterday wetting my training-pants doesn’t seem so big anymore.
"Very good," mommy praises me as I finish the star. "Do you see how many stars you made already?"
I look at it surprised, for a moment having trouble of connecting the amount of stars on the tables to a number, but only for a moment.
"Five!" I say, holding up all fingers of my left hand.
"Yes Johnny. Five days you are already a little toddler," mommy says approvingly. "Do you know what is missing?"
I look back on the chart, suddenly remembering.
"Yes, today or tomorrow you should make a little caca in your training-pants."
"I did caca at the pool!" I suddenly remember.
"Only a little egg and only because you were excited," mommy tells me. "This doesn’t count."
Mommy shrubs my hair.
"Only a reminder Johnny," she tells me. "Come eat!"
She gives me a playful slap on my protected but and I run laughing in the kitchen. There I lean on my high-chair, wondering how large it looks before mommy picks me up, places me in and secures me with straps. She puts a bib around my neck, before placing a plate with sliced white bread with peanut butter, grapes and sliced apple-pieces on the tray. I eat hungrily, not caring too much if I get peanut butter on my fingers, or the bib, all the while randomly swinging my legs.
When I’m all done mommy cleans my face and dresses me in a striped-shirt and trousers, before sending me off to play.
Old King Cole was a merry old soul.
And a merry old soul was he.
I smile as I listen to the nursery song coming out of the cd player. My main attention though is given directed at my fire-truck I drive through alleys made of blocks. How many fires I have already put out, how many cats saved from trees. It is important stuff and I shortly wonder why I didn’t become a fireman when I was big. Well I am one now! Grinning I extend the ladder.
Old MacDonald had a farm
And on his farm he had a cow
With a moo-moo there
And a moo-moo there
Being a farmer would be cool, too. Being a farmer with moo-moos and neigh-neighs.
Here a "oink" there a "oink"
Everywhere a "oink..."
The song suddenly stops and I look up discovering mommy pushing the stop-button.
"Time for a little adventure."
Mommy doesn’t tell me more, so I grow pretty excited. I hold Skully close while we drive around, only holding at a shopping market to buy some sweets and biscuits. I take Skully to the market, too, making the woman at the register smile at me. Mommy puts all in the large backpack which seems already quite full.
Our destination turns out to be a large house with two levels. Mommy makes me leave Skully behind in my seat and leads me there while holding my hand. She rings the bell and while we wait I hear the sound of children squealing behind the door decorated with two balloons, one green, one red. Surprised I look up at mommy, but the door is opening already. A woman with a dress with flowers printed on it smiles at us.
"Oh hello," she greets us. "You must be Miss Turner."
Mommy smiles in return. "Miss Caster, hello. I hope we have not come too late."
"No, we haven’t even started," she says, turning to me. "And you must be Johnny."
I say nothing, feeling intimidated by the situation I don’t understand and move a bit closer to mommy.
"He can be a bit shy and I haven’t told him, yet, because I wasn’t sure we would make it."
"No problem come in."
Mommy leads me in and kneels in front of me.
"You and four other little boys and girls are having a potty training party," she explains while removing my shoes. "You know how to sit on a potty now, do you?"
I nod aghast. In this moment, a two toddlers run around us, chasing each other. They don’t wear trousers, so their training-pants are clearly visible.
"Good to know the dress code," mommy jokes and removes my trousers, too, before giving me a playful smack on the butt. "Do you want to see what games there are?"
I nod insecure, look at her and then toddle after the other children who already run back into another room. Before I enter this room I look back at mommy, but she is already talking to Miss Caster, paying me no attention. I feel forgotten and terribly scarred. How can mommy risk this after what has happened on the playground? Since I can’t ask her I carefully sneak in the other room.
It is bright with the sun coming out of a large panorama window leading to a garden. The decoration makes it quite clear what this party is about. Paper forms of big boy underwear hang around as does real big kid underwear with a Batman-, Superman-, Green Lantern-, Frozen and Cindererella theme on them. On one table I see salty snacks likes brezels and chips, but popcorn too. Also there are a lot of thinks to drink like juice, tea and water. The adults seemingly don’t want to leave something to chance.
There are five adults, three women, two men and also four toddlers, two boys, who have begun wrestling on the ground and two girls who play with dolls a bit aside. An older girl, maybe four is sitting close to her mother, leaning sleepily close to her. In the middle of the room, clearly the center of it all, are four potties. It looks friendly, but I still feel insecure how to enter and what to do.
I look up, seeing one of the man smiling at me from the couch. Before I can respond he kicks a small ball at me. More isn’t needed to break the ice. Laughing I kick it back into the room and follow it again and again, paying attention to nothing else. The other boys join me seconds later, as are the girls a bit later. Together we hunt the ball as if it was the best thing in the world, which it is for us right now. We even kick over a potty, but none of the grown-ups gets mad and I barely notice my potty now standing among the others.
Finally Miss Caster grabs the ball, putting it under her arm and claps to get our full attention.
"Well, well little footballers. I think it is time to start the party in earnest," She gives each of us a special smile. "Do you know why you are here?"
"Potty," one of the girls says.
"Mh-Mh. Make peepee and caca in potty," says one of the boys.
"Mh-Mh potty!" I exclaim as I feel the need to say something.
Miss Casters smile widens.
"Very good," she praises "We are all here to see help you learn to use the potty and become big kids!"
Again she claps her hands and all the other adults join in. Some of the other toddlers laugh while I smile, feeling happy and proud.
"Let us start with a little video!"
With this she starts the TV and activates a dvd-player. A soft tune begins to play and an animated potty appears grinning at us.
"Who is ready for potty-training?"
The screen turns to a little boy and a little girl of our age waking up smiling. They sit up in their small beds themed after cars and princesses and look up at their mommy coming in the room.
"Yosh and Amy are quite big kids already," the voice says. "They sleep in big kid beds."
It turns to them with a group of other toddlers sitting in a circle around a woman in a brightly decorated room full of toys.
"Have a lot of fun with their friends at daycare."
The scene turns to them riding tricycles and then to one playing with a ball.
"And play big kid games games. There is just one thing stopping them "
The scene turns to them playing in the garden, waddling in the pool, as their diapers swell to a size much too big to handle, another shows them playing in the living room, their mommy picking them up when she notices they are in need of changing and puts them on the changing table while they just want to play.
"So they decide...", the voice begins.
"We are big kids!" the siblings yell happily.
"... and begin potty-training!" the voice concludes.
The kids jump up and down, as do two of the toddlers present. I want to do so, too, but then Miss Caster stops the movie.
"You will all start the journey of becoming big kids. So lets get the party started."
She winks to a man who presses a button on a cd-player. A bright, happy and soft tune starts I can’t identify. Our Parents put party heads on us and Miss Casters gives us all small bowls with salty chips and bezels we eat hungry after this excitement. Then the adults talk and we are herded outside into the garden.
It is great weather to wear only a shirt and training-pants. I see a large tire hanging for a tree and race to it. My socks get dirty from grass and earth quite quick, but I don’t even begin to care. Once there I realize it is too high for me to climb on. Silly! Another boy has followed me. Silly too! I laugh, as I swing the tire. He swings it, too, laughing with me. I like him. He wears a training pant with Buzz Lightyear on it, which makes me like him even more. His party hat has the name Toby on it, but I won’t say it. No chance. Clever.
Miss Caster calls us and we see the other three toddlers standing by a slide half the size of an adult, but big enough for us. Toby races to it and I follow him, trying to be the first, but not quite managing it, so he slides first. Back on our feet we want to continue our race, but our mothers are with us first. They lift us, removing our socks and then give us tetra-packs of sweet tea for us to drink from straws. I do so thirstily, not thinking too much about it, as it seems to be just the thing adults do.
Feeling not thirsty anymore we resume our race. I follow Toby inside, passing other toddlers I don’t care too much for right now, so they are just a blur for my right now quite focussed attention. I and Toby run around a table, barely noticing the two adults who sit at the couch, until the woman of the two call us.
We look up and see that they are blowing up ballons. The man throws me a red one and the woman throws Toby a blue one. I laugh, pushing mine away and laughing even more at the slowness of its movements. Before it can touch the ground I grab it and run outside with it wanting to show it mommy. I find her on a bench talking with a man, Instantly I race to her.
"Mommy gotta balloon!", I squeal, touching her knee.
She smiles at me. "Such a great balloon Johnny. It is red like your potty isn’t it?"
I grin as response and suddenly feel unsure what to do now, whipping on my feet, full of energy I don’t know how to use. Mommy knows the answer and puts me on her lap, giving me some pretzel sticks before continuing her conversation with the man. I nibble the snack the away, all the while too concentrated on it and my red balloon to listen to what the adults are talking, so only hearing words like safety seat, studies, easy. Boring! I prefer looking the red balloon, touching its smooth surface and smiling at how it seems to shimmer in the sun. It must be the most beautiful thing I ever owned!
A moment later mommy shakes me softly, as if to wake me out of slumber, only that I don’t think I even dozed.
"Look there Johnny," she says pointing at where Miss Caster is standing trying to gather the children. "Go play. I will keep the balloon."
Knowing it is save with mommy and curious what is happening I run there. Besides Miss Caster stands a large can as does two meters away.
"Now that you are becoming big kids it is time to get rid of these icky diapers," She says and shows us what is in the bowl she holds. Diapers! "You just throw these in the can there and you will get a price!"
To demonstrate it she knees down and pulls a diaper out of the bowl. It looks like used and properly taped together.
"And shoo!" she says and throws it into the can. "See? You can do it, too! And now my present!"
She puts a yellow cape made of soft fabric around her neck. It is much too small for her, but for me it looks just right.
"Who is first?"
All toddlers, including me, pressure her.
"You first Ashley," She says and hands a diaper to a girl with curly brown hair.
The girl wants to walk to the can to throw it in the easy way, but Miss Caster stops her with a hand on her shoulder.
"Throw it from here," she says. "Just like I did."
The girl nods, throws and miss by good half a meter.
"Good!" Miss Caster says. "Now try from there."
The girl understands this time, throws and hits the can, looking insecure to the adult who smiles and puts a pink cape around her neck. At once the girl is running to her mommy to show her, while Miss Caster turns to us.
Peter, wearing a superman shirt, throws with enough strength, but misses it by thirty centimeter too much left. Laughing he runs to it and throws it into the can, to get a red cape.
I step forward grinning, sure I can hit it the first time. When Miss Caster hands me the diaper I feel how it is slightly moist -of water as I hope- and remember that I will wear one of these soon. Suddenly a thought uncalled and unwanted crosses my mind. How unfair it is for me to do so. To play toddler games and win by superior, adult skills. It is mean. It is cheating. Even the snacks I got at the party suddenly have a bad aftertaste, as they belong to someone else. Insecure I see to my mother.
She smiles and suddenly everything is good. I realize, that this party isn’t just for me, but that she seems happy, too, to talk with other parents. Besides the other toddlers have recently used diapers, so they have much more experience with it, not to mention with being this age. I look at Miss Caster who makes a throwing gesture and throw. The diaper hits the edge of the can and for a moment it looks like it will fall out again, but then it falls inside.
I jump up and down in excitement, feeling cool, feeling big. No worries or second thoughts, for a moment no thoughts at all, but the feeling of the bliss of winning. Miss Caster smiles on me and puts a green cape around me, fixed with a rubber band. I don’t care that it isn’t red and ran around, feeling like a plane. When I come to mommy she gives me some water from a plastic bottle to drink. I accept thankfully and race back to diaper-throwing-game. We throw some more diapers, even when everyone has his or her cape. It is so much fun.
Then Miss Caster leads us to a group of small plastic tables and chairs, just our size. There are colorful cupcakes on it and around it sheets of papers showing the forms of big kid underwear and crayons to fill them out. No one of us needs to be told what to do as we sit down and grab for the crayons. I grab for the red one and begin filling out the form in up and down movements, being such drawn into it, that I forget to check if I do it right for my age. Looking around at the table I see that the other toddlers have do it the same way. Happy to have done it right I want to show it mommy, but when I look around I notice she is standing behind me already, smiling down on me.
"Fireman!" I say, showing it to her "Look Mommy!"
She takes it and studies it with awe in her face.
"Such beautiful!" she says impressed. "Can I keep it?"
I nod grinning and grab myself a cupcake, taking a large bite from it. Pure delight! Mommy then gives me a tetra-pack of sweet tea I drink from with the straw.
"Time to go inside Johnny," she tells me once I have finished.
I stand and take her hand so she can lead me. Around us the other toddlers are led inside, too and there in the direction of the potties. What different sort of potties there are! One is red, too but has a horse’s head to sit like you are riding. Another stands like a chair, decorated with Mickey on it. One more has the site of mine, but a Winni the Pooh head. The last two are like mine, but green and blue.
"Do you need to go potty Johnny?" Mommy asks.
I shake my head slightly, not really feeling the urge to do.
"Well there is no rush. Just sit down on the potty and we will see," she declares. "You know what to do first?"
I’m honestly confused, sucking at my finger and noticing it still taste like the cupcake.
"First you pull down your training-pants, silly," mommy tells me "Can you do this Johnny?"
Feeling slightly embarrassed for not having guessed it, I nod eagerly and pull them down, then I step out of them and kick then away. I grin as they fly and feel not the slightest hint of embarrassment that everyone can see my pee-pee only happiness at seeing mommy smiling.
"Now sit down."
I obey, feeling instantly safe on my red fireman potty and even better once I put my thumb in my mouth. Mommy still smiles when she shows me a book called It’s You and Me Against the Pee... and the POOP, too!. I can read it, but instinctively I first I look at the picture of the red haired boy in his blue shirt and big boy underwear, wearing a strainer on his head, swinging a toilet-paper-roll and it is only after mommy names it, that I look at the letters. Letters aren’t such important after all, for it has many colorful pictures of the boy learning to go to the potty in it and mommy tells me something about ever single one of them. All the while she gives me the straw of the water bottle to drink and a bit of cupcake to it, but I still don’t feel like needing to go.
I watch it interested, but a moment later my eyes wander. The other parents read to their toddlers, too, some of the latter being interested, some rather not, looking around like me. There is Toby sucking his thumb, too. The sight makes me smile around my thumb and suddenly I can see it clearly. How nice it will be to be a big boy, making pee and poop in the potty and go with the other big kids in daycare. We could play firemen, there or pirates, or both. Building sand castles and chasing us. A voice in my head tells me this isn’t like it is going to be, but it sounds boring and adult, so I push it away with the force of conviction. Sure it will be great. Riding tricycles together and listen to caretaker telling cool stories...
Suddenly I feel my bladder giving in and my bowel a moment later. Something falls in the potty, giving a slight splash which wets my butt, but I don’t care.
"Mommy potty!" I declare proudly.
Mommy clasps her hand in front of her. "You did?"
I nod and in an urge to proof it, I stand up, turn around and lift the potty to show her the content. Some sprinkles of pee still trickle down my wee-wee, but I don’t even notice, nor that mommy has pulled the cell-phone to take pictures. All I notice is the proud smile on her face and her sweet laughter. I feel like laughing, too and nearly burst with pride. Left of me a man smiles knowingly on mommy and around me other toddlers now make use of the potty, too, but I’m the first!
"Made pee-pee and ca-ca," I say.
"Oh you did Johnny," mommy says. "Why don’t you sit down a moment to be sure all is gone?"
I feel like all is gone, but mommy already takes the potty, puts it in the floor and then makes me sit on it again. I don’t feel like it, but moments later I feel more pee going in it and mommy smiles knowingly. An adult blows a colorful party-blower and from then on it is smiles and clasps and laughter. Not long after mommy makes me clean myself with wipes from huggies, so she helps a bit with the butt and then we throw the content of the potty in the grown-up potty.
I wave the pee and ca-ca goodbye before racing back to the others, still only wearing a shirt and begin chasing balloons. A bit later mommy catches me and shows me a big boy underwear. It is blue with a bit of red, having a superman theme.
"It is yours now big kid," she says.
I laugh at this, but am not too fond of the underwear since being superman is nearly as good as being a fireman. She dresses me in it, while I already look around for more things to do. When the others have their new underwear, too, Miss Caster pushes some buttons on a remote control and suddenly there are children of our age on the TV dancing the potty-dance to best tune. Some begin to jump up and down with the song, with me jumping highest, not knowing what to do with the energy I feel. She hands us all party-blowers we blow as hard as our lungs allow it. To top it, she puts six rolls of toilet paper on the big table, held there by rods and shows us how to roll them down. We quickly learn how to do so and in no time the whole floor is covered in toilet-paper. A girl whirls around, becoming nearly completely covered by it. I let myself fall, quickly sinking in until not even my head looks out. Then I jump up and begin to dance to the song again, laughing as I do so. So much fun!
Finally the party moves outside again. There is a see-saw, made of one plastic part and I enter it together with Toby, going up and down, up and down, both of us laughing like mad. There is more sweet, too, though sadly no more pretzel stick or chips, but cupcakes and popcorn. The girl with the curly brown hair -Ashley- suddenly cries and I notice her Frozen-themed big kid underwear is wet before she is carried away by what looks like her father, but when she is brought back, stark naked, she smiles again. I and Toby chase each other again to the tire and around trees. He gets me and wrestles me to the ground, making use of being bigger, but it is all smile and laughter. A bit later Miss Caster brings us a ball and every toddler is on the grass, kicking after it, though we fall most of the time, with the adults kicking him in again when he rolls too far off field.
Finally the first girl and her parents leave and after mommy makes me go to the potty one last time and we leave, too. Mommy makes me carry a little bag of gifts from the party, but when we arrive at the car she puts me in the front passenger seat instead of my safety seat.
"I just try something out a daddy on the party told me."
I turn around to see she is working at my safety seat for some reasons, but don’t ask further questions. Instead I focus on the bag and pull out its contend. There is liquid soap with a happy green frog on it, some crayons, a pack of big-boy-wipes with Mickey on it and a party-blower. Besides it there is my drawing of my big-kid-underwear and some pull-ups-training-pants with Jack on them. I hesitate, look at them and feel the somehow already strange feeling of sitting on a butt not padded.
Today was the best day ever and I didn’t even wear training-pants during most of the time, not to mention a diaper. So do I really need one to feel good? To feel whole? I have fooled the adults and wearing diapers means having to be changed which prevents me from playing, more so, many of my age don’t wear them, so why should I? I’m a toddler even without them!
This realization makes me feel very insecure. Being between two and two and a half year old means having this choice. No adult looks suspicious at me for wearing one or not. Half a year more or less would remove the trouble of choosing and suddenly I wish for it, even if it meant to be one year older.
I remember the girl crying at having wet her big-girl-underwear and know how she must have felt. Not being big. Disappointing herself. Stumbling on the first step to the grownup world. I grab the a training-pants from the bag, feel its comforting thickness and know my choice. Wearing big-boy-underwear looks cool, but it means responsibility and worry, too, even if it is about your own bladder and bowel. This is for big kids like Toby who are on their way to Kindergarten, numbers and letters. I don’t need this. I have mommy. Smiling at having mastered this crisis I begin sucking my thumb and still do so with the training-pants in my lap, when mommy says something.
Curiosity pushing away the beginning of sleepiness I turn around and discover in wonder that my safety-seat has changed the direction, now facing the rear.
"Looking back," I notice.
"Mister Edwards said it is still much safer for toddlers of your age," mommy comments. "Do you want to try?"
I feel insecure of how to feel about this, but suddenly I remember something more important.
"Training-pants?" I say, showing them to mommy.
"You want to wear them again?"
"Well then," Mommy says.
With me standing on the front passenger seat she removes my big-kid-underwear and puts me back into training-pants. I smile while she then puts me into my safety-seat and straps me up. This new position feels much more like lying than sitting, but in some way it feels more comfortable, too. I can touch the back of the back-seat with my feet and enjoy this feeling, as I just as easy can rest it on the safety-seat. Turning my feet closer to me I notice how dirty, almost black they are of racing around bare feet nearly the whole day.
"Do you like it?" mommy asks from the driver seat.
I ponder and there is only one thing I don’t like about it.
"Wanna see you," I say, turning my head with great difficulty in the straps only to see mommy look at me from the rear-view mirror.
"I’m sure there is something to do about it," Mommy notices. "The most important thing is that you are safe!"
I nod drowsily, as the car begins to move, rocking me gently. My thumb seems to find its way to my mouth on its own and the sun seems to play with my hair, being all smiley. I don’t even notice that I still wear my potty-party-hat. The last thing in my mind before I drift to sleep is: Yes, mommy keeps me safe.
I wake up in my own bed. The first think I notice is that it is much later due to the light being slightly dimmed outside, the second that I am sucking my pacy and Skully is at my side. Feeling happy I also notice that my training-pants is dry, but this doesn’t seem such important. While I would like to just lie there a bit more I hear mommy’s voice from the living room and the TV running. I imagine that there is much fun going on, maybe even Jack and the Neverland Pirates running and I want to see it. Pushing the blanket away I slide to the ground, remembering in the last second to pick up Skully, for he will surely want to watch, too.
When I enter the living room I’m surprised to find Calli sitting on the floor in front of the TV, watching My little Pony with her own Twilight Sparkle besides her.
"Hi," I say.
"Hullo," she replies, before turning her attention back to the monitor.
Mommy steps in from the kitchen, carrying a plate of sliced bananas, apples and oranges.
"Good you are awake Johnny. I already wanted to wake you," she says
Calli turns around, seemingly more interested in a grown up.
"Jonny is little!"
Mommy nods. "He is since a while. Do you remember Calli?"
Calli shakes her head. "He is littler now. He is a baby!"
Mommy smiles, but I don’t know how to feel. On the one hand I’m happy to have fooled her, on the other I don’t feel as proud as I was at the party with all the adults calling me a big kid.
"I was on big-boy-party!" I declare.
Calli looks surprised which makes me smile.
"There was a swing and a slide and a... a..."
"See-saw," mommy helps and I nod. "Why don’t you sit down and tell her about it?"
I nod and sit down besides Calli. Mommy puts the plate in front of us and goes back in the kitchen. I try to tell Calli about the potties and games during the party, but she isn’t really interested and looks back to the TV, so I give up. I never followed My little Pony and am not too interested now, since it is in the middle of an episode, so I take my fire-truck from my room and play with Skully while Calli watches oblivious of me. I in turn are surprised to look up and discover mommy sitting on the couch, looking on her laptop with what I know is her work-face.
A bit later Sesame Street starts which interests me much more. I hardly remember watching the show the first time around, but the characters are quickly identified and looks so very friendly. Ernie and Bernd, Gilmo. Count von Count’s flashes actually make me shudder a moment and I laugh at this, trying extra hard to not follow the numbers. Cookie Monster talks about cookies, making me wanting them, too. Looking at the plate of "healthy" food I know mommy would say I had enough sweet things at the party. Then there is Big Bird. The children on the street hug him and I want to do so, too.
I remember once reading that some of the children are said to be AR-victims like me, used because they are better at playing like the producers want. Then there was Jonas, a 5 year old boy being such liked by children and critiques, that his parents let him stay 5 for three years before a judge decided he had to be allowed to grow up and go to school. Watching the other children play I decide I wouldn’t mind if they all were AR-victims. After all the important thing is that they smile and have fun. I would even like being there, introducing Skully to Big Bird, seeing the latter’s surprise at meeting such a small bird and being hugged by him. When the end theme runs I feel a bit sad for leaving it behind.
I’m curious what show comes next, but the TV turns dark, while I still look surprised at it, Calli already looks around and following her look I notice mommy standing there holding the remote control and some papers.
"Enough TV for you two," she declares and rustles the paper. "What about drawing something?"
We both are, so she lies the papers on the living-room-table-.They have forms of Sesame-Street and My little Pony to fill out and I guess she must have printed them out while we were watching TV. Mommy also gives us some crayons from the party, and some water to drink. Calli in a glass and me in my sippy cup. And start we do. I choose Big Bird because I like him and he is quite easy to draw while Calli chooses Applejack. I fill out my form all in yellow and am quite happy with my progress, when I see Calli’s work. To fill out her form of Applejack she uses orange, red and yellow, even more her lines hardly cross the form, while mine do it regularly. I didn’t think too much of it since back at the party the other toddlers did so too, but here I’m clearly outclassed by her. Mommy isn’t watching, working at her laptop again, but I want to make her proud, so I grab the orange crayon to fill out Big Bird’s feet, planning to not cross the line even once.
I think it is easy once I really try, but the more I concentrate, the less my hand obeys me. When doing the second leg my hand mutinies and leads the crayon well down past the line. Frustrated and feeling a light pressure I begin scribbling wild over the picture.
"Be careful with the table!" mommy says, looking up.
I stop, noticing surprised that I have made a few lines on the table. My mouth opens at surprise over my loose of control.
"It is okay, I will clean it later," mommy calms me, noticing my distress. "Do you want to show me what you drew?"
I don’t, but hand it over to her anyway, feeling I threw enough tantrums.
"It looks quite good Johnny," she explains and after seeing I am not happy begins caressing my hair. "You only need to train a bit."
I nod, knowing I was never the great artist to begin with. Calli wants attention, too and shows her own drawing.
"Oh my gosh what an artist," mommy says, making Calli giggle. "And who is this?"
"This is Applejack. She runs a farm and picks apples with her hooves."
"And you like apples, do you?"
Calli grins and jumps away, grabbing Applejack and running around in kinda a gallop. When she goes into the kitchen I instinctively follow her. She giggles when jumping around in circles and I imitate her until I notice something. It is the paper with the big-boy-underwear on it I filled out before. Mommy fixed it on the fridge with magnets.
"I made this!" I tell Calli, suddenly feeling proud.
The older girl looks at it and then shrugs her shoulders, but I don’t care. If mommy placed it there she must really like it. Calli begins running back to the living-room and I want to follow her, but something stops me. It is a pressure in my bowels telling me I have to go potty big. I am about to call mommy, when I realize, that I’m still supposed to do it big time in my training-pants to proof I really want to be a baby. I want and even more I want to continue playing with Calli without a potty-break. More by instinct than anything else I go into a slightly crouching position. My muscles don’t even wait on my order to relax, so I instantly feel a strange warmness on my butt. It gets even warmer when my bladder gives in, once again without me ordering it and fills the front. When I’m done I feel much better and wonderfully empty.
Looking up I see Calli watching me with a slight smile.
"You did ca!" she declares and runs of in the living-room.
I rise and for a moment I feel like I would fall due to the training-pants being much heavier, but I get back my balance and run after her.
"Johnny did ca in his pants and pee!" I hear Calli tell my mother when I enter.
I had planned to go after her, but saw Skully lying in front of the tv, so I ran to him, now turning around I see mommy smiling at me.
Calli nods giggling.
I smile, too and let myself fall on my butt. The squishing feeling is far from unpleasant, and there is even a slight farting sound, making me laugh.
"Well then," mommy declares and leaves.
I watch her go, just slightly wondering what she is about to do and grab Skully to hug him. My friend feels soft, when I rub him near my face. Calli looks at me with innocent fascination and I return the look, feeling happy about myself. Even the odor I begin to smell isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Mommy comes back, holding wipes, a bed mat and a plastic bag. I smile as I realize what is about to happen.
Mommy kneels down besides me, unfolds the mat on the floor and places me on it. Then she makes me lie down on it and whispers a "Well done", to me before turning to Calli who is still standing by the couch.
"Do you want to help?"
Calli nods and runs to us, kneeling besides mommy.
"When you change babies it is best to distract them so they don’t make a mess while you clean them," mommy explains. "Can you do this for me?"
Calli nods and while mommy untapes the training-pants and makes for a moment an amused face by what she sees there, Calli moves Applejack to my face. I laugh and show her Skully, so our friends meet in the air. Mommy starts cleaning my front.
"You first clean the front Calli, so no ca comes to it," mommy explains while I feel the refreshing wetness around it. "This is even more important by baby girls."
"Because they have no wee-wee," Calli notices.
Callis giggles by this praise while I wiggle my legs a bit. Mommy grabs them with one hand and lifts them in the air. She begins wiping my butt, removing the training-pants from under me when she is mostly done. I remember the egg I made in my swim diaper back in the pool and now can see why mommy said it didn’t really count. For a moment I wonder what more type of ca-ca I can make, when Calli distracts me again by showing me Applejack and we play with our friends.
"You must be careful to get everything really clean," mommy continues. "Do you know why Calli?"
She ponders the question.
"To make the baby happy?"
"Right. Because babies can’t do it for themselves, so we help them. Do you like to help?"
"Very good," mommy says, putting my legs down. "I will tell your mommy what a big girl you are helping me here!"
Calli smiles and gives me kiss on the forehead.
"Happy baby!" she declares and I guess I am.
A while later we eat with me having a fresh training-pants, sitting in the high-chair and eating from its plate. Calli sits on the bench eating from the table like mommy. I wear a bib, too, the one with the giraffe and this is good, because I already once dropped a toast with strawberry jam mommy cut for me. It was Calli’s fault really, for she told so funny stories of Kindergarten that I didn’t pay attention.
When we have finished, mommy tells Calli to undress and helps me doing the same. She then brings us to the bathroom where she has put some sheets of paper and a jar of green paint on the grownup-toilet.
"Do you want to make your parents a little present Calli?"
Calli nods and mommy smiles.
"Prop yourself on the bath and lift your right foot."
Calli obeys and mommy paints her sole green with a brush after putting a sheet of paper under it.
Calli does so and after mommy tells her after a moment to lift the foot again, a green footprint is left. Mommy writes Calli’s name beside it with her brush and hands it to her.
"For your mother. It even has your name on it," then she turns to me. "You too?"
I nod enthusiastically.
Mommy doesn’t ask me to stand on one foot, though of course I could have, instead she places me on the toilet and begins painting my foot, too. It is still a bit dirty from the party, but mommy doesn’t mind and after putting a paper on the ground I jump on it. It leaves the best food print ever and mommy puts my name under it, too. Then she opens the tape to will the bath with water and I know it is bath time, still I get another idea.
"You too mommy!"
"You want me to do a footprint, too?"
I nod as does Calli, so mommy obliges and sits on the toilet, while allowing us to put paint on her foot. Calli does so with the brush, while I do so with my hands and when mommy puts her foot on the paper she looks at me and laughs.
"Oh my little indian!"
I don’t understand, so she lifts me and I see that my nose, face and even parts of my hair are green now. Letting me down she begins putting her name under it. Looking at Callis she smiles.
"Do you know my name Calli?"
The girl shakes her head.
"It is Kathleen. Though some say Kat."
"It is mommy!" I protest.
She looks surprised at me, then she gives me the biggest smile with her eyes glittering and puts mommy in brakes behind Kathleen.
"It sure is Johnny."
I look at all three footprints in wonder. Calli’s is larger than mine, but mommy’s looks gigantic. It is so hard to believe I once had such feet, so hard to ... before I can continue this thoughts mommy lifts me into the bath and then Calli who is squirling and giggling. Once in we are both happy, playing with and some small plastic balls, while mommy cleans us.
I can’t help but notice that Calli is giving me the boat much more often than when we bathed in her home and looks at me with great interest. Maybe it is because in her mind I’m now the baby for real and not already in some days. I don’t mind. It is nice to have the toys a bit longer and it is okay that she is the big kid, while I’m the toddler. This way we are both having different sort of fun, but more fun together.
I laugh at this and bite in a ball.
Once dried mommy has us clean our teeth and then makes me sit on the potty. After I’m finished she sends me to my room still stark naked, where I play with my fire-truck and some blocks. Calli joins me after a moment, dressed and holding Applejack and so we play side by side until mommy comes. She carries a thick night-time-training-pants, my sleeper with puppies on it and some crÃ¨me. After picking me up and making me stand on my bed she turns to Calli.
"When baby wear nappies they need their wee-wee, vulva and butt protected so they don’t get a rash. Johnny doesn’t need nappies yet, but it is best to make sure."
With this mommy creams those areas on me while Calli watches interested and I couldn’t feel embarrassed even I wanted to. Once done she makes me put on my night-time-training-pants and activates the lamp near my bed.
"Do you want to see something cool?" she asks and Calli nods.
Mommy pulls down the blinds, closes the door and then switches off the lamp, making my room perfectly dark. Perfectly except for my training-pant glowing in the dark. Calli laughs, mommy smiles and I laugh, too, having completely forgotten about it. Excited I jump up and down on my bed, before letting me fall on my very padded butt.
"It is time for Johnny to sleep, why don’t you go in the living-room and we will watch cartoons, soon!"
Calli races away.
"Want to watch toons, too!" I complain, when mommy dresses me in my sleeper.
"It is bed-time for you Johnny," she explains, before coming with some invincible piece of logic. "Calli is older, nearly two times your age. Besides her parents come soon and she needs to be awake."
I still pout, but mommy seemingly knows the answer to everything. She pulls my pacy from her pants pocket and puts it in my mouth. I begin to suck instinctively and find it impossible to feel sorry for myself anymore. Mommy places me right to the top of my gigantic bed, pulls the blanket up to my shoulder and puts Skully besides me.
"You had such an exciting day and so much fun, did you?", she asks, petting my hair.
Mommy rises and pulls something from a closet much too high for me to ever hope to climb and for a moment I’m in awe of her size. When she sits down to me she shows me a book. It is about baby animals, but it aren’t just pictures, but piece of coat, too.
"Look there is a baby bunny," mommy says, pointing at the front "Feel it!"
I place my hand at the coat and smile at its fuzzy feeling.
There are more. Duck and goat, cow and chick. When we are finished, I barely can hold my eyes open, though the book was so small. Mommy gives me a kiss on my forehead.
"Sleep tight big boy!" she says.
The joke makes me smile.
Before she leaves the room mommy switches off the lamp and activates the night-light. I can see animals and stars play around my room ceiling. Round and round, round and...
To be continued...