A Little at A Time

Chapter 4
Wetting the Bed

It was about 3.30am on Tuesday, November 3rd. I was sound asleep. Jessica started shaking me, the pitch of her voice raised in alarm “Tim, Tim, wake up, are you OK? I think you’re wetting the bed!” I woke up and felt it immediately. I was soaked. The bed around me was soaked. It was still slightly warm, so it had just happened, without me feeling anything at all. Jessica had rolled over and felt the wetness on my side of the bed. “Tim, are you OK?” she said again. I looked at her and waves of shame and sadness poured over me. I tried to speak, but no words came. I just started sobbing. She put her arm around me and scooched over onto the bed toward me. She pulled me in close and said “Honey, it’s ok, really it’s ok.” I instantly felt much, much better. I was still crying, but having her hold me and speak softly to me started calming me right away. “Get up and change your clothes. I’ll take care of the bed. Meet me downstairs at the kitchen table and we’ll figure this out,” she said. I nodded and did as she said.

Ten minutes later, she came downstairs carrying our sodden sheets. I was in fresh pajamas waiting for her at the table. The second I saw her, I jumped up and ran to her, throwing my arms around her, the tears coming again. “Tim, just give me a second honey. Let me get these in the wash and then we can talk,” she said. She was trying to keep calm, but I could sense the concern in her voice. She came back a minute later and sat down in the chair next to me. “We need to talk,” she started, “something is wrong. I’ve seen the stains in your underwear. You’re constantly running out of boxers. You’re crying about something or other almost once a day. And now this thing with the bed. Tell me what’s going on.”

I sat there in stunned silence. I couldn’t deny the underwear issue, of course. I was about to challenge her claim that I was crying once a day, then I thought about it. The day before, I was really thirsty for grape juice. I went to the refrigerator and there wasn’t any. I asked Jessica and she said she hadn’t had a chance to go to the grocery store yet. This made me really sad, and mad. Why wasn’t there any grape juice? I wanted it now – not later after Jessica went to the store! I stuck my bottom lip out, the tears started flowing down my face, and I stomped off to the family room, where I started watching some TV show with Ashley. The day before that, Ashley and I were playing dolls together. I really wanted this one particular dress to put on one of the dolls and we couldn’t find it. I started to get more and more frustrated as we looked around for it, until finally I broke down crying. Ashley put her arm around me to comfort me and Jessica walked it to the two of us sitting on the floor, me crying pretty hard and Ashley quietly telling me that everything would be alright.

So, I knew Jessica had me and I finally decided to tell her the truth. I told her about my potty problems. I confessed to the dribbling and skid marks, but was too embarrassed to tell her that I had actually pooped my pants a couple days earlier at work. I also explained how I had been feeling anxious whenever I had to leave her, about how terribly I missed her whenever we were separated, and how excited and happy I was to see her when we were reunited. I told her, now that she had mentioned it, I guess I had been crying a lot, even about silly things. It didn’t occur to me at the time to mention how much I had been enjoying playing with Ashley or how fascinating I was now finding her TV shows.

Jessica looked at me. She was trying to hide it, but her eyes showed me real worry. She said: “Oh, honey, that’s awful. I wish you had told me earlier, you poor thing! Listen, we’re both taking the day off tomorrow. And as soon as the bus picks up Ashley in the morning, we’re headed straight to the doctor’s. Ok?” I nodded. It was funny. On one level, I realized that I should be feeling embarrassed and scared. But the minute she said we were both taking the day off, I realized that we would be spending the day together and I was filled with excitement and joy. “Thanks for being so understanding, Jessica,” I said. We went back upstairs. She had put on the spare sheets and laid a towel down underneath my side of the bed. I asked her if we could cuddle. She said yes. I felt very safe.