Reborn

Chapter 2
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Jack woke up feeling groggy and uncomfortable.  When he moved his legs he felt something cold and damp rubbing up against his inner thighs, he felt like he was lying in something sticky. He took a deep breath and detected an unpleasant odor, it was unmistakably the smell of feces. Remembering that he was still in a hospital bed, he realized that he had soiled himself.

He opened his eyes and after a short struggle, he managed to sit upright.  He hoped, momentarily, that the events of the previous day had merely been a bad dream.  But when he examined his hands it became immediately clear to him that his memories were genuine.

He poked and prodded at his hands, before touching his face. He still couldn't believe how smooth his skin was.

The sound of a door creaking open made him jump, he looked across the room and saw a woman stood in the doorway.  She was wearing medical scrubs and her dark hair was tied back in a bun.

"Good morning, my name is Isabella, would you like some breakfast?" she asked.

He hesitated momentarily, but when he thought about it he did feel hungry.

"Yeah, thanks." Jack replied.

He blushed at the sound of his own voice, he thought that he sounded ridiculous.

Isabella walked over to the side of his bed and flipped through the pages on a clipboard.

"Doctor Palmer wants to stop intravenous therapy for now, so I'm just going to remove the cannula from your arm, okay?" Isabella advised.

As she reached towards his arm, it became clear to him just how small he was compared to her. When he saw the size of her hands compared to his own, he instinctively tensed up and tried to pull his arm away from her.

"It's okay, I won't bite," she said reassuringly.

Jack tried to relax as he watched her wrap her fingers around his forearm. He didn't feel safe and the thought occurred to him that she would be able to snap his arm in half if she wanted to.  The rational part of his mind told him that she was a nurse and that she had no reason to harm him, but he had never felt so physically vulnerable before.  He winced as she removed the cannula from his arm, but the stinging sensation quickly subsided.

Isabella picked up the clipboard again and then sniffed the air.

"I think we should get you cleaned up and changed before you have breakfast, okay?" she suggested.

He felt like he was going to die of embarrassment, but he reassured himself that she was a nurse and that she was merely doing her job.

"Okay," he replied meekly.

As she pulled back the bed covers Jack stared at his body. It was the first time he had seen his legs since the transformation, they were smooth and hairless.

"Please can you lie down for me so that I can change your...incontinence pad." Isabella instructed.

Jack rested his head on the pillow and braced himself. He knew that she was trying to preserve his dignity by calling it an incontinence pad, but it made no difference to how he felt.  He could feel her fingers on his hips, unfastening the tapes and peeling the diaper away from his skin.  The fresh air on his groin felt pleasant, but he was conscious that his genitalia were now exposed. He stared at the ceiling and grimaced whilst she cleaned his skin with a wet wipe.

He thought that the worst part was the smell, that and the knowledge that she was having to endure the foul odor.  He imagined her returning home to her family at the end of her shift and regaling her husband with the story of how she had to change a dirty diaper at work.  Now he had to live knowing that he would be the subject of that story and that it would be Isabella's abiding memory of him.  He waited for what seemed like an eternity.

"There we go, all done. I'll be back with breakfast soon," she advised.

Jack waited until he heard the door open and close, then he let out a sigh of relief. Feeling sorry for himself, he closed his eyes and attempted to banish the unpleasant thoughts from his mind. But it was no use, the feelings of shame had already been seared into his brain.

When Isabella returned he sat upright and tried to avoid looking at her.  Sensing his discomfort, she placed a tray of food on his bed without saying anything to him.  It was an omelet and French toast, served with a small cup of juice.

He waited for Isabella to leave the room before picking up a plastic knife and fork.  However when he tried to maneuver them to cut the omelet, the knife slipped from his grasp and clattered onto the tray.  He picked the knife up again and tried to cut the omelet, but only succeeded in stabbing a hole in it.

Overwhelmed by hunger, he discarded the utensils and tore off pieces of the omelet using his fingers.  He had expected hospital food to be of poor quality, but he was surprised by how delicious it tasted.  He stopped eating when he heard the door swing open.

"Jack, how's the food?" Doctor Palmer queried.

Jack wiped his fingers on the bedsheets and then stared at his hands.

"It's okay, but I can't hold the knife properly, there's something wrong with my hands," he replied.

Doctor Palmer adjusted his glasses and strolled towards Jack's bedside.

"There's nothing wrong with your hands, it's just that the muscles in them are weak. You'll need to build up strength in your hands before your fine motor control returns to normal," he explained.

Jack didn't like the sound of that, but he was more concerned by the embarrassing accident that he'd had earlier.

"Oh, will I be able to...use the toilet?" he asked.

"Incontinence is normal for someone with a body like yours, I'm afraid that you'll have to learn those skills again." Doctor Palmer concluded.

"Can I at least walk?" Jack mumbled.

"To be honest I don't know, would you like to try?" he queried.

Jack nodded his head, "yeah," he murmured.

"I'll ask the nurse to assist you, she can help you get back on your feet," advised Doctor Palmer.

Jack realized that if he was to have any hope of regaining his independence, he would need to learn to walk again.

"One more thing, I spoke to your partner and she's coming to visit you this afternoon." Doctor Palmer revealed.

Jack was looking forward to seeing Emma again, but he was worried about how this sudden transformation might affect their relationship.

"Thanks," he replied.

Jack finished his breakfast and silently prayed that he would still be able to walk.  He thought that retaining his mobility might be the last vestige of his dignity that he could maintain.  He fidgeted nervously until Isabella returned to the room.

"The Doctor said you would like to get out of bed and try to walk?" Isabella asked.

Jack looked in her general direction, but he still couldn't bring himself to make eye contact with her.

"Yeah," he replied sheepishly.

She strolled over to him and patted the bedsheets.

"If you sit on the side of the bed I'll help you down. Let's see if you can stand up first," she suggested.

Jack scooched over to the side of the bed until his legs were dangling over the edge.  Standing in front of him, Isabella placed her hands underneath his armpits and lifted him into the air, before lowering him gently onto the ground.  Jack was unnerved by her strength, he felt like a rag doll.

When his feet touched the floor he felt like his legs could bear the weight of his body, but she continued to hold on to him.  As she knelt down in front of him he was stunned by the size disparity between them, even when she was kneeling down his eyes were only level with her breasts.

"Here you go. I'll let go with one hand first, okay?" Isabella continued.

"Okay," he replied.

She slowly released one of her hands, keeping the other in place underneath his arm.  Jack wobbled momentarily, before regaining his balance.

"You're doing good so far, now I'm going to let go with the other hand, okay?" she warned.

Slowly, Isabella released her grip and moved her hand away from his body.  Jack held his arms out to help him balance, he could stand, but he didn't feel like he could move without falling over.

"Do you feel ready to walk?" she queried.

"It's hard to balance, I don't feel steady," he cautioned.

"Okay, hold onto my hand, try to take one step forward," she suggested.

Isabella held out one of her hands at Jack's eye level.  Reaching out, he grabbed hold of her hand between her thumb and her index finger, then she wrapped her fingers around his hand. Cautiously, he moved one foot in front of the other and took a step forward.

"I'm going to fall." Jack warned.

"But you're doing so well, try one more step," she insisted.

As he edged closer to her, he could smell her perfume and feel her breath on his head. Suddenly, his determination to walk was dented by a sharp pang of shame.  This woman, who he barely knew, had already changed his diaper and now she was teaching him to walk like he was an infant.

"Stop, I can't do this anymore, I'm sorry," he sniveled.

"It's alright, we can try again later. Let's get you back into bed for now, okay?" she replied.

Before he could respond, she placed her hands underneath his armpits and lifted him up onto the bed.

"You're doing well Jack, this is encouraging," she observed.

Jack crawled back under the bedsheets and buried his face in the pillow.

"Thanks," he muttered.

Even though he hadn't been awake for long, he already felt drowsy.  He rolled over onto his back and tried to think of what he was going to say to Emma.  They had only been together for two years and now he would be dependent on her to take care of him.  The thought had crossed his mind that she might simply leave him now that he was incapable of meeting her physical needs. He continued to brood about the future, until he became too tired to focus and he drifted off to sleep.

When Jack opened his eyes, he saw Emma stood in the corner of the room, watching him.  Her light brown hair cascaded down her shoulders, accentuating her piercing blue eyes.  She had a pained expression on her face and she clutched her purse tightly in her hands.  He sat upright in bed, then she took a few steps toward him.

"Jack?" Emma exclaimed.

She moved toward him cautiously, as though she couldn't trust what her senses were telling her.

"It's...it's me," he stuttered.

She stopped before reaching his bed and gawked at him.

"You remember me?" she queried.

"I remember...everything," he replied.

She took a deep breath and bit her lip, then for a moment she looked as though she might be about to cry.

"Jack, I'm so glad you're okay," she exclaimed.

He didn't feel okay, he felt like he was in a living nightmare.

"Thanks, I'm not okay, but I'm still me," he responded.

Emma edged closer to Jack and it occurred to him that she was now much larger than he was. But something else seemed different about her, she now had an otherworldly presence and he couldn't figure out why.  He studied her carefully and tried to figure out what was out of place. She was wearing a white blouse and a pair of skinny jeans, he had seen her wearing those clothes before.  There wasn't anything that he didn't recognize, everything was the same and yet it seemed different to him.

"They told me that you might not be the same after...the accident. I was expecting the worst," she explained, moving closer to his bedside.

Jack frowned and shook his head.

"They can't undo it, I'm stuck like this," he lamented.

Jack glanced up at her and then looked away, he was still stunned by the size disparity between them.  He remembered being taller than Emma and whenever he looked at her he still instinctively expected her to be smaller than him, but those memories no longer aligned with reality.  He was unsettled by the contrast between the way that he remembered her and the way that he now saw her.

"But at least you're still alive, for a while we thought you weren't going to make it." Emma consoled.

He knew that she was just trying to make him feel better, but he was finding it difficult to stay positive.  He thought about his family and wondered whether he would be able to see his mother.

"Does my mom know?" he asked.

"Yeah, she came to visit you a couple of weeks back, she had to fly back to the west coast though." Emma revealed.

He was glad that his mother had visited, but he felt conflicted about seeing her again.  Part of him longed to see her, but he didn't want her to see him in his present condition.  He thought that once he had gotten used to his new body he would be able to work up the courage to meet with her.

Jack groaned and stared at his hands.

"Look at me," he muttered despondently.

Emma reached down and placed her open hand on the bed, with her palm facing upwards.

"I know this is hard, but we'll get through this together." Emma replied.

Jack looked at her hand and hesitated for a moment.  Then slowly, he reached out and placed his open hand on top of hers, so that their palms were touching.  Using her thumb, she gently stroked the top of his hand.  He gawked at her pinky finger and noticed that it was longer than his middle finger.

They talked to each other for a while longer, pausing occasionally to collect their thoughts. Although the conversation was awkward at times, Jack felt reassured that Emma wasn't going to abandon him.  Before saying goodbye, she promised to visit him again the next day.