Cry Havoc

Chapter 3
School

Chapter Description: from Book One: Domination

monday 18 september - 8:30 AM

The signs read “DICK CUMMING, SHERIFF.”

Unsurprisingly, their ubiquity -- plastering lockers, obscuring flyers, adorning classroom doors and those of administrators’ offices alike -- represented the most obnoxious disruption to jeopardize Tupper High’s educational efficacy since the inception of the school year. Peals of laughter obfuscated the delivery of the morning announcements. Teachers experienced great difficulty maintaining order in classes populated by tittering, giggling students. And the school administration, having concluded that a prank of such magnitude invariably suggested breaking-and-entering and necessitated criminal trespass, scrambled to conceive a solution and find reassurance that perhaps other, more dangerous, items had not been planted beneath the illumination of starlight.

The police had been called first, but any and all evidence of the Tigers’ malfeasance had long since been stricken from this realm of existence. That had been Loudmouth’s responsibility, and he was nothing if not thorough. Fingerprints? Wiped away. Bootprints? Such things hadn’t even been left; the three kids knew after years of proverbial “grinding” to perpetrate their prank in their stocking feet. Most adroitly, Recon had long ago isolated the location of the security station and had Loudmouth pilfer the very video tapes upon which indisputable visual proof of the trio’s crime had been recorded. The attending officers had nothing, and, while they filed a report as a formality, they were quick to point out to the school’s governing body that nothing beyond the institution of a periodic night patrol could be done.

“We know you did it,” the assistant principal glowered, each of the Tigers seated in chairs facing the administrator’s massive oaken desk. “So just admit to it and we won’t press any charges.”

“Alright, alright,” Impulse sighed, rolling his eyes. “You got me. I was two minutes late this morning. Jerking off, y’know? Massive cum, too. I bet I could’ve impregnated China with that wad. …And it just occurred to me that I left my biology textbook at home. So tell me what I have to write 500 times and let’s get on with it.”

Mr. Benes, the assistant principal, slammed his open palm against the surface of his desk. “The signs, smartass. You stole them from the neighborhood, you broke into the school, and you vandalized every available surface with them. ‘Dick Cumming.’ Very clever.”

Recon chuckled.

“Oh?” spat Mr. Benes. “You think this is funny? Is that it?”

“Pretty much,” replied Recon, “yeah.”

“But we still don’t know what you’re talking about,” Impulse added.

Mr. Benes turned to Loudmouth. “What about you, Peter? You have anything to say for yourself?”

Loudmouth shook his head slowly and deliberately, his gaze never leaving that of the assistant principal.

“Shocking.”

“Can we go now?” said Impulse. “Seems to me you’d want to use this time to try and find the actual comedic geniuses behind this caper.”

“Get out,” Mr. Benes said flatly, waving the back of his hand towards the door. “But keep one thing in mind. Our eyes and ears are on you from now on. And if one of you so much as fails to cover your face when you sneeze, you’re going to have so much detention under my close personal supervision that this school will become your legal residence.”

As the trio filed out of the assistant principal’s office, chains jangling all the while, Impulse made a point of grabbing his crotch and muttering something rather unflattering about Mr. Benes’s wife under his breath. The administrator heard the remark, but merely reclined in his chair and said nothing. In his fantastical conception of reality, he was the long arm of the law, the hammer of justice, and he knew well enough than to indulge instant gratification at the expense of hitting the jackpot by virtue of patience.

He’d get them, the little pricks. Benes would do precisely what the Maker’s Point Police Department had failed to accomplish year in and year out: He was going to make an example of the Tigers.

And it was going to be worth the wait.

to be continued