Malice Aforethought

Chapter 10
Fight or Flight

It was like waking up from a vivid dream. I remembered the video chat with Eric and Elly. I remembered why I’d come here. I remembered it all. And I knew what was going on. There was some programme on my phone that had been hypnotising me, making me a dumb little kid! I looked at the Lego men in my hands and realised I was sitting on the floor, legs splayed out, wearing nothing but some baggy, childish board shorts over a big thick nappy. Whatever she’d been doing to me it was working. But now that I’d realised it I felt so much clearer, much better than when I’d tried to escape at the library. I even remembered the escape blanket by the wall and the car key hidden under the broken kerbing.

My eyes flicked over the door. I could escape right now, just run outside, scale the wall and run for it. But there was a problem. My wallet, my ID, my passport was all packed away somewhere and I needed to find it before I could go anywhere. I looked back over at the kitchen. Elly kept glancing over at me every few seconds. She wasn’t taking her eye off me long enough to allow me to search anything. And I understood why. I was still wearing shorts, I’d refused multiple suggestions to get naked like the others. She knew a part of my adult sensibilities was still there, holding onto that scrap of modesty and thus she knew a piece of the adult me was still there, ready to surface, as indeed it had.

Should I just overpower her? I was much stronger and bigger than her of course. But the way she’d had me behaving I knew that was a bad idea. I’d underestimated her at every turn and paid the price, being paraded around town like a pre-schooler. She could have programmed me with some secret trigger phrase that she can use to incapacitate me as soon as I resist. I could run anyway, go straight to the police and take my chances. But that still seemed like a huge risk, a foreign half-naked man wearing a nappy, with no ID and a crazy story about a woman turning men into giant toddlers? They’d throw me in the nut house in two seconds.

So that left me with one more option; lull her into a false sense of security then find a way to search for my stuff and run for it while she wasn’t looking. I figured it had to be in her bedroom since that was the only place in the house I had seen the boys stay clear of. A game of hide and seek would provide the perfect opportunity to sneak in and look while she was out here counting to a hundred. Of course there’d be no way to stop her publishing the photos and ruining my reputation and without the phone I’d have nothing on her, but it was time to cut my losses and run before she took my mind as well as my dignity.

Over the next hour I had to simply bide my time and wait for the right opportunity. I couldn’t let on that I was thinking clearly, lest she find a way to show me that damned hypnotic programme again. Each time I’d seen it had put me much deeper into the little boy mind-set and blanked more of my memories. I didn’t want to even consider what another viewing would do to me. So I kept playing with my toys, even doing little voices for them and making sound-effects for their war.

I have to say it was a masterful performance. When Benny cam and tried to play with me I yelled, “No! They mine!” and gave him a rough shove, sending him back onto his bum. That earned me a sharp telling off by Elly and I played up the pout and even forced a few sniffles and eye-rubs to give the impression of tears.

Then, as I pretended to play more amicably with Benny, I saw what I was waiting for. Eric and Timmy had paused their play and were now sitting side by side with their legs splayed out, their heads looking down and their arms at work. It was what Elly had said often happened with overgrown toddlers. Dropping my Lego man I left a confused Benny and crept quickly over to face the two young men on the other side of the living room.

Just as I thought, each young fellow had a sizable erection and they were stroking away at them with both hands. Their faces were relaxed, peaceful, their eyes glassy and distant as they pleasured themselves. There was no sense that this was meant to be something private, no concern that I was now watching them. I wondered who had begun and how quickly the other had grown erect and begun playing with himself to copy his playmate. Just seeing them this way, so dumb and free of worry or inhibition made me grow quickly erect myself. I felt an overwhelming urge to touch myself, to drop down before them and stroke my pee-pee until I’d squirted out all my big boy thoughts just like them.

I had to resist the growing base urges, no doubt fuelled by the programming I’d unwittingly received. I sat down beside the men nonetheless, slipping off my shorts but leaving my nappy on. The front was noticeably distorted by the stretched material as my stiffy tented out the garment. I hadn’t realised until now how soft the material within was. It caressed my penis and urged me to shoot my load right now. I held myself back, turning to Eric and draping my arm gently across his bare shoulders, feeling his sticky warm skin. He looked at me with those vacant eyes and said, “Doin’ stickies.”

I nodded. “I can see that buddy. Stickies are fun huh?”

“Mmmhmm.”

Slowly I put pressure on his shoulder, pulling him back onto the floor and rolling him onto his side to face me. We looked into each other’s eyes, only inches apart now. I could feel his quickening breath on my face as he continued to stroke away at his member. I could see he was close now, his mouth was gaping open and his eyes began to roll back.

“Ugh,” he gasped and I knew it was time. I squeezed myself right up against Eric just as he reached orgasm. I could feel the warmth splashing across my stomach and as much as it disgusted me, I knew it put me one step closer to my goal. Eric panted, his face radiating bliss.

“Glad you enjoyed that,” I told him quietly, taking my discarded shorts and using the inside to wipe the mess off Eric’s tummy and pee-pee.

“What are you boys doing, being so quiet over here?” Elly asked, appearing from the kitchen.

Her arrival was faster than I’d expected and I only had one chance to get this right. I looked up at her and put on my biggest, dumbest grin. She smiled back as I stood, revealing the white goo streaked across my stomach. I scooped up a bunch of it on my finger, forcing down my own revulsion, my need to vomit, and held it out to her. “Done stickies!” I announced loudly.

Elly grinned herself now and put on her highest, most condescending voice. “My goodness, look at all those creamies! You certainly did make a big squirt-squirt, didn’t you baby?”

“Skirt!” I shouted and hopped up and down, hoping I wasn’t overdoing it.

Elly didn’t seem disappointed with my act. She waved me over saying, “Come on baby, let’s clean you up a bit.”

I toddled over to her with my best impression of Timmy and Eric’s wide gait, aided by the bulky nappy between my legs. She took my hand and led me to the kitchen, taking a washcloth and wiping away the cum before it dried thank goodness. Then she stroked my hair while I did my best to make my eyes go out of focus so they looked nice and glassy and dumb. “That must have been a lovely relief for you sweetie, losing those last big boy worries,” she said. “I bet it felt just lovely.”

I said nothing, just gave her my best confused, slack-jawed gape. “Let’s give you a little treat,” she said, leading me back into the living room.

“Wan’ pway mummy!” I babbled loudly, hoping to get a game of hide and seek started up now. I wasn’t sure how long I could keep up this act.

“I know sweetie and you’ll play very soon, but first you get a special treat,” she explained.

I wasn’t sure what was going on as she sat down on the couch and patted the seat next to her for me to take it. But as I sat she manoeuvred me so my head dropped back across her lap, settling in the crook of her left arm. She directed my feet up onto the arm of the couch so I was lying across her lap. It was a very strange position to be in for me.

“This is something I can only do for you little ones once a week, but you deserve it today,” she told me, pulling off her shirt and uncoupling her bra. My eyes widened as I realised what she was about to do. Part of me wanted to run while I had the chance, but a much bigger part realised I was about to experience one of my greatest fantasies and I needed to stay right there.

Elly smiled broadly at me and guided my head up towards her waiting nipple. “That’s right baby, it’s okay, mummy’s here for you. Open wide darling.”

I did as directed, taking the teat in my lips and beginning to suckle. Warm milk filled my mouth instantly. It was amazing. I swallowed and felt a shiver of ecstasy race through my body. My eyes were locked on hers as I fed. She actually looked so radiantly maternal at that moment, so caring. The monster was gone and only this angel remained. For that moment I felt so little, so cared for that I didn’t want to leave.

“That’s it, such a hungry boy you are,” she cooed, rubbing circles on my bare tummy. “You’re filling your tum-tum right up, aren’t you?”

I kept suckling and swallowing. It was heaven. I didn’t need to answer her questions, no words were expected. But then she said something I hadn’t expected.

“Oh my, it seems you didn’t quite get all those creamies out earlier, did you baby?”

I wasn’t sure what she meant for a second, but then I became aware of the soft material caressing my penis again and I realised I was fully, achingly erect. Was I in trouble? What did she think that meant? Oh god, my heartbeat started picking up.

“That’s okay baby, mummy understands how exciting this all is, getting so little and being so close to mummy. Baby can’t help it. It’s just so much fun to lose all those big boy thoughts. Mummy can tell it’s very arousing for you boys. Your brothers made several stickies a day after they first got all little.”

I breathed a sigh of relief, but didn’t miss a beat on the suckling. She didn’t know I was faking it or she wouldn’t be letting me continue nursing. I was in the clear.

“But that’s quite fast to get all stiff again sweetie. We should make certain all those big boy thoughts are gone for good,” she cooed, moving her hand down from my tummy to the front of my nappy and pressing down on my stiffy.

I took an extra-large gulp of creamy breast milk as her hand closed around my raging stiffy through the nappy and stroked it up and down. She accelerated her motions so quickly after that I couldn’t think what to do. There was no foreplay here, she was just trying to help me finish quickly, to ensure any remaining flicker of adult intellect was completely gone. I moaned and tried to sit up, spitting out the nipple and taking a breath.

She cradled my head and said, “Shh, shh, it’s okay baby. Mummy knows now that those weren’t your creamies on your tummy before. But that’s okay, mummy’s not upset with you for your little trick. Mummy understands that you’ve been scared to let go. You need some help sweetie and mummy’s here to provide it. You don’t have to be afraid anymore. I’m here for you Aiden. I’ll always be here for you. Mummy will be here to care for your every need, keep you warm and safe. You’ll be my whole world baby,” she explained to me, stroking away. She leant close to my ear and whispered, “We’ll have your creamies out on your tummy in just a second and then mummy has a whole other breast for her little one.”

She knew! It was such stunning information but I couldn’t react, I was so overwhelmed by the sensations. The soft, fuzzy material she was stroking madly up and down across my stiffy, the breast milk dribbling down my chin as I gaped up at her, the sounds of the boys playing their silly toddler games, it was all too much. The sensory overload blocked out any thoughts of escape and instead of running I scrunched my toes and pointed my feet, pulling myself closer to Elly as she stroked away.

She kissed the top of my head and whispered, “That’s it, no need to fight it. You know how good it feels and how lovely it will be afterwards. Time for all those big boy thoughts to wave bye-bye.”

It was a powerful image and it was fixed in my mind as I felt myself orgasm at last. “Ughhh,” I moaned, feeling the warmth pump into my soft thick nappy, throwing my head back in bliss.

“That’s right, get it all out baby, let it all go,” Elly whispered in my ear.

I knew this was it, this was the trigger for the final regression. And yet I felt like I could fight it if I wanted to. There was a chance, a possibility I could emerge from this and still be me. Then I’d defiantly shove her to the floor, free of her power. I’d get my stuff, even my phone, leave and go right to the police. It was within my power to walk away.

But I could also feel the other possibility. I could feel that it would actually work if I let it. The trigger was permission. It was permission to let go and forget all about being a grown-up, to stop being embarrassed, to be the silly dumb toddler I’ve dreamed of becoming. Elly was so beautiful as a mother after all. She’d been amazing when she thought I’d given in. She was promising to care for me forever, the way she did with Eric and Benny. She was so tender and loving. It was very enticing. I could feel the window closing on that one chance. If I just held out I’d still be me, with all my mental faculties intact. But I only had a few seconds to take the other path, let the trigger erase my adult mind. At the height of pleasure I had to decide.