D.E.A.L.

Chapter 6
untitled

Christmas morning came swiftly, and we spent it opening presents that magically seemed to have appeared under our tree (which also magically had appeared...) My legs...my legs finally seemed to have shaken off the torpor that had held them since I awoke. They were still very weak, but they held me as I walked along. It was as though God himself had decided to present me with a gift on his son’s birthday. I looked on with some bemusement as I opened a few of the smaller packages, to reveal little toy knights, perfectly sized to combat the dragons that I had sitting on my dressers. I asked Dani about it, and she confessed that it was an odd feeling that had told her to get them. I told her I loved them, and handed her a small envelope. In it, was a gift certificate of a rather large size. Before she could say anything, I said that while gift certificates are usually the worst sort of gift when you’re trying to be personal, I made her promise to take me to every store listed on the card, and let me shop with her. She smiled and kissed me, and told me how if I ever tried to leave her, she’d find me. I was far too special to let go.

Once the living room was covered in paper leavings, I decided to grab from my room Dani’s final gift. All but using my guitar as a crutch, I brought it into the living room while Dani closed her eyes. As I began a few awkward cords, her eyes fluttered open, and then I began to sing.

I sang of her, of us, of our future, and our short past. I sung about the horrors I had felt on waking, and how her face, as the first thing I had to hold on to, eased all those. I sung of color, something I had only recently been able to enjoy and experience, and I sung about the park, and the December winds. I sang of my love for her, and the love I knew she held for me. Tears fell from her eyes like rain, and that was it.

That night began the first of several odd dreams that became a nightly occurance. Each time I slept, I’d dream of being a kit again. A lot of the dreams began with me at the top of a huge slide, and as I slid down, a lot of the things that I enjoyed about my time little would come back up to me. In the morning, I always expected to be 7 again, round eared and pot bellied, As I bounced off the slide, I’d turn, and I’d see Dani coming down after me. Then I’d wake. Soaked.

Now that my legs were finally obeying my commands, the need for diapers ceased to exist. I could have been lazy, but graduating to real underwear (Mommy wow) actually felt like an accomplishment. However, those weird dreams nessaitated at least some protection at night, which embarrassing though it might be, I was used to.

Finally, after three days of that, I wished to be little again. Nothing specific, I really was hoping that would clear up my dreams. Turned out, it made them worse. I had sooooo much fun that day, playing with my toys, watching TV, playing tag with Dani...I...well...let’s just say I enjoyed it more then I probably should have. And I still wore diapers in that form, for some reason, but I didn’t protest them. Having gone without them, it actually felt ok to have that cushiony pillow wrapped around my butt. Heh. The night ended with me promising to make this a common occurance.

It wasn’t til New Years Day that something interrupted my peaceful times. We had just finished moving the majority of Dani’s stuff into our bedroom earlier that day, and looked forward to an early bedtime. We hadn’t really partied to celebrate the night before, but we did share a bit of nice wine that we had dug out of the cellar (I wasn’t even aware we had a cellar) and stayed up to watch the orb fall over New York City. It was so weird, watching the TV in this world, seeing the odd mix of human and animal people cavorting around, but looking down, at what was curled in my arms, I didn’t think it so terribly strange. I was just nodding off when I heard a buzzing, nagging sound, hovering at the edge of my senses. I tried to dismiss it.

The voice shook me awake, and I murmured a low ?go away’. The events of the afternoon had worn me out dead, and nothing, NOTHING, was going to get me up.

“NOAH!”

“Ahh! What?” I sat up and glared around, peering into the darkness. It didn’t help, there was no one there.

“In here, dipshit, in here.”

The voice came from in my head...

“Hayden? Is that you?”

“No, it’s Santa. For fucks sake, of course it’s me. Unless you have other voices that talk to you.”

At this, the little mental image of a shadowy figure again materialized behind my eyes. The form was blurry, almost static, and not as solid as the last time.

“What do you want? Long time no ?talk to’,” I said, calming down. I had a magical key that granted wishes. This was ok.

“Look, there’s something that I need from you.” Hayden’s voice came. It still carried that nasty, haughty tone, but there was something strange about it, something I couldn’t place. I roused myself further.

“And that is?”

The voice took on a pleading ring. “I need my body back.”

“What?!? Why?”

“Look, just wish my body back to me. I’m going to wish yours back too. I think it’ll work.”

He sounded desperate, and I struggled to comprehend. “No, why do you want it back? Haven’t you had enough fun with mine? Why now?”

“There...there was a party, for New Years. You know, one of those ones that everyone gets totally bombed at. I might have had a bit too much...you fucking humans can’t hold your damn alcohol...and...well...there was a crash. I drifted into the oncoming lane and got clipped by an SUV. I...I’m hurt bad.”

I digested this in shock. “What about the other driver?”

The figure raised it’s hands in the air, angrily. “Bitch is going to press charges! The only reason I’m not in jail is because I’m currently occupying a full-body cast. I’ve heard some of the nurses talking...they think I might be paralyzed. Damn it Noah, you don’t know what that feels like!”

“I think I might have some idea.”

He stabbed a finger at me. “Oh, no, you don’t. Whatever happened, you at least got to move around a bit. Try being anchored in place, 24/7, sitting in your own filth, while your stupid girlfriend tries funneling blended spam down your muzzle! You have no idea!”

“So, what? You want me to go back to a broken body? To jail, if you turn out to be fine?”

“No, no,” he said, shuffling around. “You’ve still got that stupid key, right? You could just wish your way out, right? C’mon!”

“Why don’t you use your key?”

“The damn thing won’t work anymore! I...I accidentally wished for two things on the same day. Ever since, it won’t do shit.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“You’d damn better be sorry! Now hurry up. If I don’t get out of this damned cast, I’m going to go fucking nuts. I have an itch down my thigh that’s driving me crazy.”

“Did you cause the crash you were in?” I asked suddenly, as pieces began to fall into place in my head.

“Wha?”

“The crash that first paralyzed you. Paralyzed me,” I added. “How did that happen?”

“Oh fuck, you really want to get into this now? I don’t have time!”

“You’re not going anywhere.”

“Ok, yeah, funny guy, I had a bit too much to drink after we won the championship that night. Hit a car and wrapped my mustang around a fucking tree. There, you happy?”

I didn’t say anything.

“Well?”

“I’m sorry that you couldn’t learn your lesson the first time. I’m sorry that life chose to deal you two bad hands. But...I can’t help you. I’ve come to terms being ?you’. You’ve...you’ve just got to take responsibility for being me.”

The figure stepped closer in my head, shock and rage apparent on it’s shadowy features. “What the hell?!? You have no bleedin’ right to tell me that! That’s my body, damn you, give it back!”

“I’m sorry.”

“Please! Don’t leave me like this! I can’t move, I can’t do anything! I’ll kill myself! I’ll find a way. Please! I don’t want to go back to being that thing on the bed...please...”

My heart felt sick, but I tried to fight it down. I glanced at the clock. 10:59. “Hayden...I...I wish I couldn’t hear you anymore. Ever.”

“Nooo! Damn you, it’s my body! You have no right! You have no right!”

I tried to turn away from him, shut him out in my head, but the wish wouldn’t take effect until after midnight. For an hour, he begged, pleaded, threatened, and wept, and I think I wept along with him. He had dug his grave...and at a minute past one, his pleas suddenly fell silence. Feeling ill, I did my best to fall asleep, but his words would haunt me for several days after. I made a promise to myself that someday soon, I’d wish him the best of it, hopefully, I could do something for him from here, but...not now. Not now.