Happy Days

Chapter 3
Happy Days are here to Stay

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Chapter Description: Dan has a session with a therapist that really improves his attitude.

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Well, this is the final chapter, chock full of mental AR for those who’ve been waiting for two chapters.

The office was not what I expected for a psychologist and I could now see why that teen boy had been so very eager lo leave. The whole room was done in a Winnie the Pooh motif, painted in bright pastel colours. What father would take their teenage son to a shrink who decorated the office for kindy kids. There was a thick white carpet and it was cluttered by a little kid’s hobby horse, a toy vacuum cleaner, a big lego set and a few plastic Thomas the Tank engine toys. It was actually more childish than the kindy I had spent all day at! Dr. Miller, or was it Mr. Miller, took a seat in a cushy swivel chair behind the desk. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why they would send me to this man for an evaluation. What was he going to judge how well I could build a lego castle? I think my disability should be obvious to anyone with more than ten IQ points, the whole purpose of this evaluation was likely to make some money for the beurocracy.

"So how much is this going to cost me?" I asked.

The therapist seemed confused. "Cost you? Oh, don’t worry about that it will be taken care of."

Of course it would, the government took my taxes straight out of my bank account, so naturally that’s how they’d charge me for this. Nothing I could now of course, they’d charge me just for showing up. I’d have to have a talk with Liz about this afterwards though. The govenment was notorious for overcharging on these kids of things.

Miller looked at me curiously, in a way that made me feel like I was an intersting new species of centipede that he had just discovered. It wasn’t pity or disgust, just raw curiosity. Finally he seemed to snap out of his reverie and cleared his throat, perusing a file that sat on his desk. He squinted, then fumbled around on his desk. "Just a moment," he said as he rearranged piles of paper. I hadn’t noticed till now how disorganised his desk was. Finally he pulled a pair of glasses from beneath a manilla envelope and slipped them on.

"Right then, I talked to your wife this afternoon and I think I understand the situation. I just need to ask you a few questions," he said, smiling indulgently at me.

"Okay."

"Have you been sleeping more than normal lately?"

"Normal for me, or normal for a four-year old boy? Because they aren’t the same thing you know." I told him, unable to keep a hint of exasperation out of my voice.

He nodded, "Just more that you think you should be sleeping."

I pondered that. "Well I do sleep a lot, I often take a nap around two in the afternoon and I go to bed around eight." I noticed he was writing something in red ink, looking serious. "But I mean my body just needs that now." I added, a bit perturbed by his note-taking.

Miller said nothing in response to that and simply move to his next question, barely glancing up at me. "How is your appetite, do you eat as much as you think you should?"

"Well I eat whatever is put on my plate, I leave the portion up to Liz, I mean she makes the kids meals so she would know best eh?"

"Hmm." he mumbled, making more notes. I was seriously beginning to dislike this fellow.

"Now this is a more personal question. Do you ever feel as though you’ll never be cheerful again, as though there’s a cloud over your life you can’t escape?"

"Well I mean I have been shrunk into a little kid, I think I’m entitled to be a bit depressed, don’t you? I don’t spend my days sleeping away my life and I eat plenty. Now I’ve had enough of these ridiculous questions, they’ve got nothing to do with my disability!" I knew I had overreacted, but I finally realized where all his questions were going. I had assumed he would be assesing my mental age, but apparently he was searching for a mental disorder of sme kind, perhaps that could be an excuse not to pay me disability. It didn’t make much sense, but what other explanation was there.

The therapist didn’t seem upset at my outburst, he just took more notes in that infernal red pen. Then he looked me seriously in the eye. "Daniel I have to tell you that your wife expressed concern that you were spiraling into depression because of your situation. I too am concerned. I think the best think we can do right now is try out a relaxation exercise."

Of course it was Liz, she really could be a bother sometimes. I figured I best play along rather than face another night on the couch if the therapist told Liz I was uncooperative. "Okay, I’ll try that."

The therapist smiled. "Good, good. I call this a visualisation and relaxation exercise. I want you to get comfortable in your seat. Good, now close your eyes if it will help you visualise." I kept my eyes open, I wasn’t entirely sure where this was headed.

"Now I want you imagine a tropical beach perhaps in Fiji or Samoa. Have you ever been there?"

I nodded, "Yes Fiji, last Christmas."

"Good, imagine your favourite beach in Fiji. It’s totally empty, not a person on the beach. The turquoise water is lapping gently at the shore and there is warm breeze blowing. Now imagine that you are sitting on the beach in your swim togs. The sand is soft and silky, not too hot. You are sitting right at the edge of the water and the tide is coming in. Now I want you to feel the warm water, bath-water warm, splashing up against your feet and slowly rising over them. And as it does, your muscles there relax and release all their tension. And now the water moves slowly up your legs and again as it does so you can feel the warm water drain the tension from your legs, making them warm and heavy. Very heavy. Now as the water creeps up the shore around you, let yourself lie back into the sand. Feel the water weaching your hands and arms and they relax and are surrounded by the perfectly comfortable water. Good, you’re doing very good. And now the water reaches your neck and I want you feel the muscles there, so very tense and stiff, realease now and let your head go limp. That’s all right, you are perfectly safe, nothing can harm you in your perfect beach world. Now feel yourself gently float ot into the water, totally surrounded by it, relaxed all over. Very good. Now I want you to feel your arm suddenly lose its weight, lose all it weight. In fact its now lighter than air, let your right arm float up over your head. Very good. Now when I touch your right arm you are gong to drop into a deep sleep and all you will aware of is my voice. Nothing but my voice. I’ll count to three and then touch your arm and you will go deep asleep. One, ready to drop so very deep. Two, opening your mind totally to my voice, three."

I don’t know what is going on or where I am but I have never felt so wonderful and relaxed. Nothing can hurt me here, somehow I just know that. And then there’s a calming, soft voice in my ear. It fills my mind.

"Now I want you to stand up and come with me. ou won’t wake up, just stay nice and deep and relaxed but take my hand and come with me."

I found myself standing and walking, a warm unseen hand leading me somewhere.

"And now you are going to open your eyes, it will take a lot of effort because you are still in your very relaxed and open state, but you will open them."

My eyelids must have been tied down with wieghts. I finally managed to crack them open and found I was facing a mirror. I could feel dried tears running down my cheeks but I don’t remember crying. I can barely hold my head up.

"Good job, very good. Now tell me what you see."

It takes a lot of effort but I mumble, "Me."

"Yes, but tell me exactly wat you see in the mirror."

"Little boy, very small, pale, looks sleepy." I whisper, barely audibly.

"That’s right, that’s you. You are a little boy, a very small helpless little boy. A very sad little boy. I want you to think about how much fun it is to be just a little boy, a real lttle boy. You get to eat lots of lollies, you mummy gives you bubble baths and tucks you in bed safe and snug. You get to discover new things every day and get really dirty playing. You don’t have to worry about a thing. Wouldn’t it be nice to be a real boy?"

His words were filing my sleepy head and they made so much sense, I knew what he said was the truth. It was fun to be a real little boy, I wish I could be a real litle boy and not a grown-up who looks like a little boy.

"Wouldn’t that be nice?" He prompts me again.

"Yes" I mumble.

"Good, now I want you to go back to you beautiful beach again. Now take a big handful of that soft white silica sand and feel it. Now I want you to take all of the memories that make you who you are and put them in that hand, let that sand become your memories. Now put in there all the things that make you a grown-up, all your knowledge and skills and your vocabulary, your sense of modesty, your fears and inhibitions. Even your adult intelligence, that ability to reason that you gained as you aged. Put it all in your hand, picture it there, you know its there. Going to school is there, driving is there, the alphabet is there, everything is there. And its so very heavy, so heavy it actually urts to hold it all, like holding the biggest rock youcan imagine. It would be so nice to let it go wouldn’t it? To drop it all and let ll the wieght scatter in the wind like sand. Well right now you are going to keep it there tight in your hand, weighing you down as it does. But when you hear the words, ’Dumb Little Boy’ you are going to remember the beach and what you have in your hand and you are going to feel your hand open wide. All your memories and intelligence and everything that makes you a grown-up will fall away and be scattered in the wind. It will never come back, because its gone, blown away forever. When you hear those words, "Dumb Little Boy," you will let it all go, open your hand and let go. And you will feel the release of all that weight with so much relief. Because you will finally be a normal happy little boy and the rest of your days will be happy days."

The weight in my hand was incredible, I had so many memories and they were all right there in my hand, literally, I knew they were. I just wanted to let them go and be happy.

"Now Dan come back here, away from the beach, back to your comfy chair. I am going to count to three and you will slowly wake up and find yourself refreshed and relaxed and comfy. You will not remember anything but your relaxing time on the beach. You will not remember what we talked about, only how calming the beach was. Now one, waking slowly up, becoming more alert, two, slowly returning to alertness, three, wide awake, refreshed and alert."

Now that was an experience. I don’t recall ever feeling better. For a little while there I was able to totally forget about my situation while I was laying on that beach in the sun. The therapist was standing right next to me now, smiling down. "So how do you feel?" he asked.

"That was actually pretty good. I feel so awake and refreshed like you recharged my batteries, its great."

"Good to here it. Now I think we’re done for today, I’ll be sure to send the documents over to the ACC right away, no worries," he assured me.

Great this was finally done with, now I just needed to sort thngs out with Liz and everything would be perfect. I can’t remember te last time I felt so optimistic, it’s like I just know everything is going to be okay. Liz is waiting for me outside, reading a women’s magazine. "All set Dan?" she asks as I head out.

"Yes, and I feel great dear. Let’s get home and have some dinner."

Liz seemed taken aback by the change in my attitude, but she recovered quickly and took my hand, leading me back out to the carpark. The scorching sun had gotten low on the horizon and was taking on the orange hue of late day. I noticed the carpark as almost empty, how long had I been in that office? It hadn’t seemed like more than twenty minutes. But clearly it had been much longer. It was so late, in fact, that Liz had to turn on the lights as we headed home. She pulled our Subaru Legacy up the gravel drive just as the last light faded from the sky.

I found the kids busily playing video games as I walked in the door, unstrapping the velcro straps on my sandals and dropping them in the pile of shoes by the closet. They seemed engrossed so I went to my room to relax. I was sure I had put the newspaper there this morning, but i couldn’t find it anywhere. I managed to climb up on the bed and looked all around the high bureau surfaces which I couldn’t see standing on the floor. No sign of it. I thought of asking Liz but I could here her getting dinner ready and my stomach was grumbling too much to postpone dinner for any reason. I’d have to locate it myself.

I headed into the hall again and then thought maybe Liz had put it in my old office, which she now used as a little art studio for her watercolours. I went into the room I had avoided like the Plague ever since my transformation. It was another reminder of what I had lost. But I was in too good a mood to let silly memories ruin it. The room smelled strongly of paint supplies, as I expected. My computer and files were gone and a pinting easel stood in the centre. The floor was covered in a white cloth tarp and I was carefull not to step in any paint. The newspaper was nowhere to be seen but there was an odd pile of papers on my old desk in the corner. I climbed up on the chair and looked at the pile, looked like old bills and old post. Then I noticed there were several e-mail print-outs. Carefully removing them from the pile I noticed the address was that of the laboratory responsible for my predicament. I was ready to throw them away when I noticed the date. These e-mails were only a week or so old. I hadn’t had any contact with them in a month. They had been addressed to Liz’s e-mail account. As I read the subject line I felt my heart skip a beat. "Urgent: Possible Cure Found" it read. I quickly read the message. They had apparently found a possible way to reverse the effects of the treatment, but it wasn’t a sure thing. There was a danger that I could age too far, or die right there. But it was a possible cure nonetheless. How could Liz have hidden this from me! This could solve all our problems! My anger was almost boiling over. Finally I mastered my temper and headed down the hall, e-mail in hand, to see Liz.

She was just putting the finishing touches on a pavlova we were having for dessert. She looked over at me with a smile, but it quickly disappeared when she saw what I was holding. "What the bloody hell is this Liz! What else have you been hiding from me!?"

Liz looked devestated. I just stared at her, with rage in my eyes. "I’m sorry Dan. I hid it from you because I knew you’d want to do it."

"You want me to stay this way! You actually like things like this? I can’t believe this, what is wrong with you?"

Liz shook her head, pleading, "No Dan, I don’t want you to do it because you might die and then where would we be? The risk is just too great, I can make it work without your income but I just can’t do it without you, I can’t face losing ou forever. I’d rather have you this way than not have you at all, I love you no matter what you look like."

This wasn’t what I had expected at all. But whateverher reasons this was still a painful betrayal. "It is my choice to make, it’s my life and you had no right to keep this from me."

"No Dan it’s my life too. When you married me you made your life mine and vice versa. I am not going to let you take another crazy risk, and in case you’ve forgotten you didn’t ask me what I thought before you volunteered for that study in the first place," Liz chided.

"Look I’m sorry for what has happened but I need to make this decision for myself, I won’t make it alone, but I have to have the final say." I hoped she could understand.

"Dan, I am sorry I kept it from you, but I honestly planned to tell you tomorrow. But I simply can’t let you do it. At the doctor’s today you weren’t there for a check-up at all. I hired that therapist because he specialises in hypnosis. He’s now planted a powerful suggestion in your mind. If you insist on having the treatment I’ll have to trigger the suggestion which will reduce you permanently to mental childhood."

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I had been betrayed in a way I hadn’t thought possible. Liz sawmy stunned expression and she continued.

"It wouldn’t be so bad Dan, you’d be so much happier if you forgot about being a grown-up. You could play and have imaginary friends and I could get you real playmates. You would be right at home at the kindy, no more refusing to take your shirt off or go into the splash pool. It would be such a relief for you. But the important thing for you to understand is that even though I would rather have you as my husband, I would prefer to have you as my third child than be a widow."

Was it really possible, what she said? Or was she bluffing? I wasn’t sure, and if I couldn’t be sure I couldn’t gamble with my mind. "Okay Liz, you win, I’ll promise not to have the procedure unless they prove to you that it’s safe and you agree. But you have to have this hypnosis reversed, agreed?"

Liz smiled, "Absolutely! I’m sorry I’ve been such a bitch these last few days but I’ve been hiding this secret for a week now and it was getting to me. Don’t worry Dan, we’ll get those suggestions removed right away."

I breathed a big sigh of relief. Now all I had to do was get those egg-heads to convince Liz that their new solution was safe, even if it wasn’t. This was not how I planned to spend my life, growing up all over again.

I slept well that night, back in my proper bed beside my beautiful wife. Now I had something that had been completely lacking in my life since long before my regression, I had hope. Awaking the next morning brought another bright spot, I was bone dry for once. Maybe I was finally over the night-time accidents. Birds were chirping outside and Liz was still sound asleep, but I could here the silly sounds of cartoons coming from the living room. So I pulled myself out of my warm bed and jumped down to the floor, padding softly so as not to wake Liz. I considered changing my pull-up, this one had particularly ugly Barney characters smiling up at me, but I figured that could wait. My Bob the Builder T-shirt didn’t quite reach to my waist, but it was warm enough this summer morning anyway. I found the kids happilly watching an episode of Looney Toons, Dave laying on the couch in his flannel superman pajamas and Emily sitting on her knees right in front of the TV in just her night-shirt.

"Emily you shouldn’t sit so close to the telly, it’ll hurt your eyes, now go get dressed, you’ve got school today." I told her.

Emily rolled her eyes at me, that cheeky little girl, and then she ignored my order and returned to watching the Road Runner. "Emily c’mon." I tried again.

Emily looked me up and down, "How come you aren’t dressed daddy, don’t you got kindy today," she stated defiantly.

"I am still your father and a grown-up..."

"No you aren’t! You’re just a dumb little boy! I don’t gotta listen to you!" she interjected.

I was about to retort when I had te funniest feeling. I felt as though my right arm was holding a massive weight. Squeazing my hand I was sure I felt a lump of very heavy sand in it. I opened my palm wide and felt the heavy sand float away. It was so strange, my whole body seemed lighter, like a huge load had been lifted and I felt so airy. Suddenly I’m sure that I’ve forgotten something very important, but I don’t know what. Its the distinct sensation of having forgotten that overwhelms me. Perhaps I forgot to have a bath, is that right? No, didn’t I have one last night? I don’t know. But then I realize it’s okay, it’s not my job to ’member stuff, that’s what mummy does. After all I’m just a little... wait. That’s not right is it? I need a mirror. I know I can find the bathroom that’s where the big people toilet is, the one I use all by myself. I rush to the bathroom and find the mirror. There I am, that’s me. Now why did I want the mirror? I dunno. I stick out my tongue and blow a raspberry. Hee, hee, that’s funny. I start making lots of funny faces at myself, I’m such a silly boy. But then I wonder something. Didn’t I used to be big. I really think I used to be big, but I’m not now am I? I look at my pull-ups, I can see the stars, I’m all dry. I am a big boy, I can use the big person toilet and I’m all dry and I even have big boy undies that I can go get on. I guess i made pretend I was little, what a silly thing to do. I look up at the clock, I wonder what time it is? I’m not sure what the hands mean, which one is which again. But then I realize I can’t quite remember what the numbers mean either. I look at the clock a long time and then I giggle. This is dumb, only really big kids can read the clock of course, I’m being so funny today. I step up on the stool by the sink. There’s a big bottle on the edge, I push down on the top and this white stuff sprays out! That’s fun! I spray more white stuff on the little mirror. Mummy might be angry though, I don’t want to be naughty, so I try and wipe it off, but it just smears worse. Uh oh. I better go, maybe mummy won’t know I did it.

I look in the mirror again. I don’t got any trousers on, I don’t think I like trousers, I wanna show people my big boy undies. Mummy will make me wear trousers though. I think I’ll wake up mummy now, I wanna show her I’m all dry, she’ll be real proud a me.

A soft poking in her arm woke Liz up. She yawned widely then opened her eyes. Dan was standing at the side of her bed gazing at her with the strangest look on his face, he looked quite curious. "What is it Dan, I’ll get breakfast started in a minute, just go out and wait." She told him sleepily, she just wanted another five minutes rest. But then Dan did something she really didn’t expect. He smiled at her and declared, "Look mummy I’s all dwy!" Pointing proudly at his pull-ups. Liz was fully awake in an instant.

"What did you just say?"

"I’s all dwy mummy, see. Lookit. Can I get on my big boy undies now?" Dan continued happilly.

Liz wasn’t sure what was going on. "Um, yes honey, uh, go get your undies on and I’ll get you something to eat."

"’Kay." Dan agreed, running over to the dresser and getting a pair of undies out, then running back out of the room.

"Dear God," Liz muttered to herself. Somehow his hypnosis had been triggered. She had chosen the specific trigger phrase because she had expected to slip it into an argument about Dan getting the procedure if he had insisted. Now she realized it was a foolish choice of words. But what could she do, she had been assured it would be peranent, that the suggestion had been phrased in a way to prevent reversal. So there was nothing to be done. Dan was now Danny and would be for a long time to come.

Mummy made eggies for brekkie, my favourite. She had to talk with Dave and Em first but now we was all sittin’ at the table eating together. Mummy gave me a fork but I use my hands instead, it’s lots easier. Em keeps smiling at me and giggling, I dunno what’s so funny.

"So Danny is just a little boy now for real, eh?" she asked me.

"Nuh uh" I insisted, "I’m a big boy."

This just made Em giggle more, that made me mad, I am a big boy, I know I am. "Mummy make Em stop laughing at me!" I whinged.

"Leave him alone Emily, Danny is your little brother now and you will be nice to him." Liz ordered sternly.

The rest of breakfast was okay, Dave and Em left to get dressed and mummy started washing dishes. I grabbed her leg, I wanted to be hugged, I reached my arms up. "Mummy want a hug!" I demanded. But mummy just told me to play on the floor while she worked. I found my toy firetruck, I like that toy it’s the bestest. I push it around the floor and pretend I’m a big grown-up fireman. I crash it into mummy’s foot, bang! "Watch it Danny, don’t do that to mummy. Go take your toy outside. Mummy looks sad, so I do what she says. When I open the front door I get this funny feeling, I shouldn’t go outside without any trousers on. But I’m not sure why. "Mummy!" I call to her.

"Go on Danny, play outside, mummy will be done in a sec."

I decide it must be okay if mummy doesn’t mind. I go out on the steps and play, the sun is real warm on my legs. Then Dave and Em come out in their big kid school uniforms. I wish I was big enough to wear a uniform like that. Em waves at me giggling, "Bye bye little Danny, have fun at kindy." Dave gives her a dirty look and kneels over my me. He kisses my forehead and toussles my hair, "Love you little bro, I promise I’ll play with you after school, ’kay." I like Dave a lot, he’s really nice and fun. "Bye-bye," I yell at him, waving my hand hard. He and Em walk real funny down the drive ’cause the gravel must hurt their bare feets.

"Arms Up" mummy tells me, slipping my t-shirt over my head. She does the button on my shorts, I almost got it, but it’s real tricky. I don’t mind them ’cause their bright blue, my most favourite colour of all and they’re real soft. I’m excited ’cause I’m going to kindy and mummy says I’ll make lots of friends there. Mummy lifts me up onto the bed and picks up a black sandal and starts strapping it on my foot. I frown, "Mummy why do I ots to wear them, Em and Dave didn’t haveta wear shoes!" I really didn’t wanna wear them, and mummy understood. She just smiled real big and she was even laughing! "Don’t worry honey, no shoes for my little boy," she said and she put them back in the closet. I don’t know what’s funny but I laugh too.

I really like kindy. We play lots of fun games and the grown-ups that watch us are really nice. After we have lunch it painting time. "Do you feel like playing today Danny?" asks one of the grown-ups. I nod my head yes and she takes off my t-shirt so it won’t get all messy. I get extra messy too, but its okay ’cause we get to go in the pool next.

Liz went back to see Leo Miller on her lunch break. The office was apparently empty for lunch as well, but when she knocked on his office door, she got a "Come in," in response. Leo Miller was sitting at his desk wearing his glasses on his head, writing notes in a file. "Ah yes, Liz, how has everything worked out?"

"Not well. I decided not to use the hypnosis but unfortunately it was somehow triggered anyway, I knew that was a stupid phrase to use."

Leo just smiled at Liz. "Well I have some good news for you then. My hypnotic treatment can only go so far. Without the audio tapes and sublimminal tape I was planning to sell you later, the effects last only a few hours. To keep him under you would have to retrigger him at least once and then have him listen to the tapes regularly for a week. Each retriggering of the suggestions is stronger than the last you see, so it would last longer and the tapes would make it quite permanent. But in your situation this is good news, since he should come out of it very soon."

Liz pulled the subaru quickly into the kindy carpark, she hoped poor Dan hadn’t snapped out of it while he was there, that would be terribly embarassing. She headed inside but there was no one around, of course she was here a bit early, she wanted to save Dan some embarassment. She could hear the sounds of splashing water and yelling children coming from the back. Of course, they were all in their little pool. Liz hurried out back and found a garden full of screaming tots running this way and that, how did these women keep control? Danny was standing in the little wading pool in nothing but his soaking wet underoos splashing about and giggling gleafully. No, Liz assured herself, he hadn’t snapped out of it. It probably would last all day. Danny noticed her standing there and jumped out of the pool running over to her. "Mummy, mummy, look at da pool we gets to pway in!" he exclaimed as he thrust his soaking wet body into her arms. "Danny careful your geting me all wet." Danny hopped back on the ground looking guilty, "Sowwy mummy, I didn’t mean to." Liz smiled, "No worries honey, mummy knows it was an accident, now get your clothes, we need to go."

Liz led Danny back to the car still dressed just in his wet undies, he was still too wet put on his clothes. Why hadn’t she thought to give him towells and swim togs today? Because she had other matters on her mind of course. She strapped Danny into his carseat, as he started to shiver a bit. "Mummy is cold." he pleaded, pointing to the wet undies. Well, he was just a little boy now and they were just headed home. "Fine, lets get those wet things off you then." Liz pulled off his wet underwear and finished strapping him in. Danny didn’t seem to mind one bit, his shiveing slowed and he sucked his thumb while he swung his legs back and forth.

It was the strangest thing, like waking up from a very odd dream. Suddenly I was aware that I was sitting in the car in my carseat as we drove along State Highway 2. It seemed to be later in the day than it should be and the car was quite warm, but Liz had the window down and there was a cool breeze. I seemed to have something in my mouth, uck my thumb. I then noticed that I had no shirt on, wait, no clothes on at all! What in god’s name was going on here! Looking around I saw my clothes piled on the seat next to me, out of the reach of my stubby arms. "Liz, what the hell’s going on here, why am I sitting here naked with my thumb in my mouth!" Liz just about lost control of the car.

"Oh honey you’re back."

"Back? Where was I?"

"The hypnosis was accidntally triggered Dan, you’ve spent the day as a real 4-year old." Liz explained.

With a rush it all came back to me. It was like realizing a dream was true, I remembered it all, but it seemed so unreal. Thank goodness I woke up out of it. "Liz lets get back to that therapist right now, i don’t want to take any chances."

"Of course dear but lets stop at home first for some fresh undies for you, I doubt you’ll be comfortable walking around in your birthday suit now that you have your mind back."

"Right, good idea. I can’t believe this is actually happening!"

We finally pulled up the drive to the house. Dave was riding his bike around the feild in front of our house, he waved but didn’t head over. Emily was probably inside. "Why don’t you go in and get the new undies for me so I don’t have to step out like this."

"Sure Dan, but first we need to talk about today dear."

"What about it?"

"Dan when you showed up in my bedroom this morning babbling like a real little kid I was really sad and scared. But as the day went on I really thought about it more. You seemed so happy, honey, and I have to say I liked having little Danny around, all smiles and filled with curiousity. You should have seen yourself at kindy when I picked you up, splashing around in a pool in your undies not a worry in your head, happier than I’ve seen you, well, ever."

I wasn’t sure where this conversation was going, but I was tired of sitting here covering my privates. "C’mon Liz, lets talk later."

Liz turned around and grabbed my foot, giving it a tickle. "You even chose to run around barefoot today dear. In fact I think you’re really going to enjoy being my dumb little boy from now on. Yes you’ll just be my barefooted dumb little boy, splashing in the pool and telling everyone how you wear big boy undies. We’ll be such a happy family."

I have to admit I was terrified. Liz was talking about making me her little boy, she had snapped! I wanted to get out of the car but i was strapped in tight. "Liz let go of me, I don’t want this, leggo." My pulse was racing here was no escape.

"Shhh, sweetie, we’re going to sit right here until you’re sucking your thumb and swinging your legs like a good little boy. Don’t worry dear I’ll get you your big boy clothes all nice and dry right away, I just want to see you back in that wonderful little boy mind-set."

My mind was racing, but I couldn’t think of what to do. Remembering what happened this morning I could feel the enormous weight in my hand again, but I tried not to let go, not to give in. But I could feel the sand slipping through the cracks in my fingers. Then Liz started to tickle my tummy and I couldn’t help it, I let go. The feeling was instantaneous. My head was airy and all the weight was gone. I looked at my empty hand in womder. Where did it all go? I was sure I had something very important in my hand. But now I had a delightful fuzzy feeling in my noggin’ and mummy was tickling my tummy so much and I giggled and giggled and it felt so very nice. I kicked my legs and squirmed. Mummy laughed too, I smiled at her, i like this game. Then mummy stops and I catches my breath.

Mummy smiles and rubs my head. "Okay Danny, wait here and I’ll go get you something dry." Mummy left the car and I’m all alone now. I wonder what she’ll get me, I hope not jeans they’re scratchy. I think i used to be bigger and now I’m all little again. Mummy made me little, she wants me to be a silly boy and play nakie. I look at my hands and my feet, I’m not that little. I’m really pretty big. Now why didn’t i wanna play, I dunno. Dave is riding his bike, I see him. I wanna play too, he said he would. Mummy musta undid the strap when she left ’cause I can get outta my seat. I open th door and jump down. The stones hurt, owie! But I don’t cry, I’m a big boy. I run over to Dave, the grass is better to run on than the stones. "Dave, you wanna pway, you pwomised!" I yell. Dave stops his bike and walks over. "Where are your clothes?" "All wet, mummy’s gettin’ me more. Gueff what?" Dave smiled, "What?" "I got really big but then mummy made me little again, isn’t that silly. It’s okay ’cause I’m really still a big boy." Dave looked at me like I was making things up, but he smiled and agreed that it was pretty silly. I wonder if it was all pretend.

"Danny, get in here before the neihbours see you!" Mummy yelled from the door, holding new clothes. I rushed back over, I’d play with Dave later. Mummy put me in a nice new shirt and baggy shorts then she let me go play with Dave on my trike, I bet soon I’ll be big enough to ride a big boy bike just like Dave.

Liz watched as Danny happily peddled his trike around the grass trying to keep up with Dave. There they were her two Kiwi boys riding their bikes barefooted around their yard she knew she had made the right choice, Dave would be an excellent big brother. Liz prepared the first of the tapes Miller had sold her, she would make sure that Danny would have plenty more happy days in front of him.

 

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