Tales from the Halls of Justness "Uber Woman and Anyman"

Chapter 1
The dreaded ray

Chapter Description: Uber Woman and Anyman battle Pex Putor. Who will win?

 Tales from the League of Justness

1. Anyman and Uber Woman’s tale

After saving the world from the dreaded Dr. Dementia’s nefarious ray, our two heroes find themselves back at the League of justness headquarters without a date on a Saturday night.

“Well, here we are,” said Uber Woman with a bored sigh.

“Yep, here is where we are” replied a similarly bored Anyman.

The two sat at the table with their heads against their hands with their elbows firmly planted on the meeting table in the League’s conference room.

“How about a pizza and a video?” asked Anyman.

“Pizza sounds good, but I don’t think there have been any good movies released lately” replied Uber Woman.

“Maybe we could go to the gym and work out? It’d make the pizza taste better at least,” suggested Anyman.

“Yeah, I could go for a few sparring rounds myself,” said Uber Woman warming up to the idea.

“Beats being bored. I’ll see you there in 5” said Anyman and left.

====

At the gym, the two sparred, lifted weights, took a sauna, and then got a robot-massage. Ready for the pizza, they dressed up in their street clothes and went back to the conference room.

The pizza arrived, delivered by a tall, lanky teenager. When Anyman offered to pay for the pizza, the youth just said “It’s on the house. Our manager is a big fan of the League and is even throwing in this large bottle of Joko-Kola!”

After setting the pizza down on the conference table, the two chowed down.

“That was certainly nice of that manager to pay for the pizza,” said Anyman as he pulled out two large glass mugs, then filled them with ice from the refrigerator and put them on the conference table.

“It certainly was! It’s the little kindnesses that make what we do all the more worth it” said Uber Woman as she poured out the Joko-Kola into the mugs.

The two picked up their mugs, clinked them together, and downed them in a single gulp. Anyman refilled the mugs and they sipped on them.

The League’s lobby received a new visitor who insisted on seeing the two. The night guard conferred with them and they let the visitor into the conference room.

“Can we offer you some Joko-Kola?” asked Anyman “We got it with the pizza, and there’s some left over”.

“No, thank you. I won’t be here long enough for that” responded the visitor. Anyman put the remainder of the Kola into the refrigerator and asked “What may we do for you, then?”

“You can come with me to my secret laboratory as the Kola you drank was spiked with anti-superium. As you know, as long as that mineral stays in your systems, you’ll be as weak as kittens!” said the visitor.

“By my ancestor’s beard hairs!” exclaimed Uber Woman attempting to lift her empty mug and barely succeeding. “He’s right! My powers and strength are gone!”

“It might affect Uber Woman, but it shouldn’t affect me!” said Anyman “I’m invulnerable to radiation.”

“Perhaps so,” said the visitor “but this Kola’s natural acid breaks down your invulnerability and allows the anti-superium to affect you like it would any normal human!”

Anyman then attempted to lift his mug and found it very difficult to do so. “You fiend! Come Uber Woman, let’s get out of here!” the two turned and ran for the conference room doors only to find them too hard to pull open.

“It’s useless, I tell you!” said the visitor who pulled off his disguise to reveal that he was actually Anyman’s arch-enemy, Pex Putor. He then pulled out a matter transfer device and transported the trio to his secret lab.

Securing the pair to a large metal table, the maddened scientist pulled a switch and bathed the two in a pulsating purplish light. “There, that should do. You’re free to go to the next room and await the next phase of my nefarious plan” said Pex.

Knowing that the Anti-superium would wear off soon enough, the two went into the room indicated.

“What do you think that ray did to us?” asked Uber Woman.

“I don’t know, but I feel all tingly from it” answered Anyman.

The two looked at their surroundings and were confused to see that the room was decorated as a nursery. Baby changing stations complete with wipes, powder, and diapers sat next to a set of brightly decorated cribs with a blue mobile chime that sported little teddy bears over one, and a pink mobile that sported cartoon elephants over the other. Next to the cribs, a fenced-off play area sported a soft spongy multi-colored carpet, a rocking horse, soft cloth-like blocks, and a baby swing. Next to the play area, a set of playpens sat with nothing in them. A sign above them was lettered with the words “Time Out”.

After a few minutes of inspecting the room for possible escapes, and finding none, Anyman went over to the crib area and spun the teddy bear mobile. It spun and put out a relaxing soft-chimed version of “Brahms’s Lullaby”.

Uber Teen walked over to where Anyteen was and remarked “Sounds nice, very calming. What could that villain have planned for us, do you think?”

Uber Teen scratched an itchy pimple and said “I think it has something to do with this nursery, but what?”

The two had lost height as well as weight from their dwindling muscle mass. Softer features became more prominent as baby fat manifested. As Anyteen’s suit was infinitely stretchy, it didn’t show any signs of bagginess, but his purple tights were already a size too large for his frame and barely clinging to his hips.

Uber teen didn’t have the luxury of stretchy clothing as could be evident by her all-metal bra dwarfing her diminished breasts. She had unconsciously tightened the straps on her flexible metal loin-cloth to prevent them from falling down and her war helmet fit loosely on her head tilting slightly backward.

Pex entered the room and said “Right! Time for your next treatment. Go back to the lab and get on the tables.”

“What if we don’t want to?” asked a defiant Anyteen “You’re not the boss of us!”

“Yeah, who died and made you king?” agreed an equally defiant Uber Teen punctuating her statement by sticking out her tongue.

“You’ll do as I say or I’ll ground you for 2 weeks without your phones!” yelled Pex “Now get over there!”

“Whatever.” muttered the pair as they went back to the lab and were once again strapped to the metal tables. They received another zap by the ray. This time the color pulsated from purple to green.

“Go back to the nursery and wait for me there,” said Pex authoritatively. The two complied with his orders.

Back at the nursery, a bored Anyboy turned to Uber Girl and remarked “This place sucks! All there is here is a bunch of baby toys. Why isn’t there a TV and some video games to play with at least?” Uber Girl agreed and thought a Bratz doll would be nice, too.

Anyboy struggled with his costume, the infinite stretchability of the fibers didn’t have anything stretching them, so they hung limp on his youthful frame. He gave up on his tights as holding them up all the time was a huge inconvenience so he threw them in a corner. The costume bagged up at his feet and its crotch area hung midway down his legs giving his silhouette an appearance of stumpy legs on a long body. The neck opening nearly covered the top of his arms and threatened to slip to the right or left at any moment. He had unconsciously rolled up his sleeves but the abundance of fabric dwarfed his skinny arms.

Where Anyboy’s attire could be seen as problematic, Uber Girl’s was a disaster! The helmet kept slipping forward on her head, blocking her vision so she had abandoned it in a corner. The metal brassiere was too big and once the straps slipped down her skinny shoulders making it fall to the ground, she found that she could step out of it and decided that her puffy breasts weren’t that big of a deal so they wouldn’t need coverage. The metal loin-cloth had been tied up all the way and still threatened to fall off her waist and hips at any moment. She abandoned her boots as they tripped her more than protected her feet. The only thing that she could do to make it so that her loin-cloth didn’t trip her as well, was to tie a series of knots in it to make it shorter. Even so, it hit the sides of her legs as she walked.

====

Pex entered the nursery and pushed a few buttons on a large remote that he held. The second half of the room became a set of teen single beds, dressers stocked with clothing, light blue Burberry carpet, a set of desks with laptops on them, and a well-stocked refrigerator.

“Everything’s going swimmingly, you two!” he purred happily “We’ll call it a night, and you two should get cleaned up and go to bed in a few hours. The effects of the Joko-Kola won’t wear off for about a week, so I’m not worried about you attempting to escape. We’ll resume your treatments in the morning, good night!” and left the room without expecting an answer.

With a laptop to play with, Anyboy was happily occupied as he trolled the forums and used fake Jabber accounts to start playful rumors on the internet.

Uber Girl went to the bathroom and cleaned up, wrapped herself in a towel, then went straight to her dresser and donned cotton panties and a slip. She then got on the internet and looked at all the doll makers sites that she could and went to bed a little later.

Anyboy got bored with the internet, went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth, came back to his dresser, pulled off his oversize costume then put on some Captain Cave Punk underoos, slipped into bed, and went to sleep.

Anyboy was awakened by Uber Girl a little later, “What are we going to do to get out of here? We still don’t know what that ray is going to do to us and he’s already hit us with it twice. I’m scared!”

Anyboy hugged his friend, gently brushed her tears with a gentle finger, and said “let’s see if we can open the door together and mess up his lab. At least we’ll be able to slow down his plans for us” Uber Girl nodded yes, and together they managed to open the door to the lab with great effort. The lab was still brightly lit as evil villains don’t give a hoot about electricity conservation.

A terminal was still opened with Pax’s administrator password and hadn’t yet timed out.

Anyboy looked through the schematics and used his super genius, which hadn’t been affected by the anti-superium, to figure out what the ray was designed to do.

“That bastard!” he said angrily which prompted Uber Girl to sternly say “Language!” He apologized for the slip of his tongue.

“His ray rejuvenates living tissue and modifies brain impulses to prevent the subject from knowing what’s going on!” said Anyboy “He’s already hit us twice and I think we’re supposed to be adults, not kids!”

“Can you do anything to it? Alter the program, maybe?” asked Uber Girl.

“Not really, the process to age tissue is vastly different than the one to rejuvenate it. But we can alter the beam-width and end-point to accelerate the process of whatever it hits” He started typing new parameters on the keyboard. “I’m a little uncertain about the width parameters, so I’ll just put forth my best guess. With some luck, when he straps us in, he’ll get the full strength of the ray and be reduced to a toddler. We’ll just have to go through the motions and wait for the treatment to complete its course on him”.

“Serves him right! Let’s get back to the bedroom” said Uber Girl. The two pulled open the door with great difficulty and went back to the bedroom.

Too excited to sleep, and bored with the internet, the two found a better game to play with Anyboy almost reaching third base before they went back to sleep for the night. The two ended up playing “bedtime solitaire” just before falling asleep.

====

The next morning, Pex came in and had them take a shower, dressed them up in t-shirts and jeans with cotton socks and Keds sneakers before serving them breakfast, and then ushering them into the lab.

“I’ve found that the process can be done in one shot at a concentrated frequency, so this will be the last treatment, kids! I hope you'll enjoy wearing diapers again!” said a chortling Pex.

“You’re going to turn us into babies?” asked Uber Girl with mock astonishment “That’s just mean!”

Anyboy couldn’t resist getting into the act and said “Pex, you will regret doing this to us for decades, you villainous scum!”

“Oh, shut up!” Said Pex and pulled the switch. A beam of ruby red pulsating light hit Pex full-on and the feet of the two pre-tween heroes for a solid minute. Pex didn’t notice that he’d received the brunt of the ray and ushered the two into the play area. “We don’t know how long it’ll take for you to regress, I can’t have little babies crawling around my laboratory by accident”.

“Do you think it worked? I noticed that some of the rays hit us too. Do you think we’ll be babies, soon?” asked Uber Girl. “We’ll just have to wait and see,” said Anyboy.

====

Uber Toddler struggled with her too-big clothes and freed herself. Naked as a jay-bird, she walked with unsteady legs over to Anytoddler and helped him out of his restricting attire as well, the gate took some doing, but Anytoddler wasn’t a super genius for nothing!

Entering the lab, they found Pex gurgling and cooing inside the pile of clothing that he wore. The two picked him up and carried the happy little baby back to the nursery.

As they stepped into the nursery, Pex being a baby triggered off a sensor in his vast supercomputer that started Pex’s “baby maintenance” program. The three were picked up individually by separate gynoids, taken to the changing area where they were diapered and clothed in appropriate aged attire. The two were deposited back in the play area and Pex was put in one of the cribs.

Their care and feeding were provided for them for the next few weeks. Uber Toddler and Anytoddler had great fun playing with each other, napping, and being fed.

“Well, fun’s fun and all that,” said Anytoddler as he ground his diapered crotch against the padded playground “but I’m getting a little tired of this routine, when do you suppose the rest of the Justness heroes will get here?”

“They’ll figure it out sooner or later” replied Uber Toddler as she patted her crotch area with vigor.

In the crib, a baby Pex gurgled and cooed at his gynoid for attention, was given a bottle to feed on and slurped up it’s contents greedily.