Cheese and Diapers

Chapter 1
Cheese and Diapers

Chapter Description: Yeah. Really. Cheese and diapers.

Cheese and Diapers. By: Long_Rifle

Becoming to engrossed in a serious debate our nefarious writer decides to dump and run by writing a quick story with both cheese and diaper content. And to make it quicker it will be based on the “Best Friends” story universe. So I would suggest you make haste to read it, in order to understand the- Wait a sec. You’re just going to be polishing your knob to this probably... NO damn (dam) respect now a days I swear. I’m a real writer, I deserve respect, and critical acclaim!

Woah! I’m still getting impulses of seriousness. Sorry. Story contains diapers, mental regression, and a probable bad ending. I don’t even know where this is going yet. But from past experience I’m going to assume it’s bad. Also dirty language, and cheese. Enjoy!

We join our cast as they are huddled around a TV, watching a grainy transmission skip and spike on the screen, “-and again there is no official word from Washington concerning what is being referred to as the largest DV outbreak to date. Details are slowly leaking out from the affected area of mass riots, and gangs of vigilantes attempting to restore order.” The reporter looked down at her computer screen for a second and grimaced, “It appears we may have a live feed from the area, please welcome-” The image cuts roughly to a new reporter. “This is Mia Culpa! Live from Garten City right in the center of the outbreak. You can hear random gun shots almost ever minute. And if the camera pans to the left you will see smoke rising from several burning stores. I don’t have anything from officials here, but the estimation is near 60 percent affected now. With the numbers growing everyday. New fears of a bigger pan global outbreak has caused the CDC to ask us to remind everyone that it takes physical contact with contaminated blood or other fluids to be infected. That there’s no truth to the rumors that this is spread via open air.” She reached up towards the bud in her ear, then nodded and looked earnestly into the camera. “I’ve been told that I’m apparently urinating in my pants as we speak.” The camera panned out and the view of her slacks confirmed it as true. She smiled, “I think I want to have my mother change me now.” She picked at the pants with one hand, then dropped the overly large, and unneeded mic. “Yeah. I want my momma...” She slurred. Then she was lost to everyone as the camera started to droop, then dropped to the ground and went to static.

The image on the TV reset back to the national reporter, a stunned look was on her face for a split second before it cut to commercial. One of the people in the room grabbed the remote and flicked it on mute. “Not air born my ass!” He added before standing up and going over towards the fridge.

“Mike. This thing is big. Who knows where she picked it up.” A meek voice said.

He turned from the open fridge, “I guarantee she didn’t touch anything other then what she brought in with her. She was too cute to do anything serious, she was fluff in over her head. You have to know that Alice. Dammit! Who took the last of the gouda?”

“Shut the hell up both of you!” An older female voice nearly screamed before catching herself. “This is serious!” She turned towards Mike first, “Ryan ate it last night asshole. Try the rodoric, it’s better for you!” She turned away from the group and stared towards a small block window high up on the wall. “We don’t know exactly what’s going on up there. We need to wait it out. When help comes we’ll be fine.”

Ryan was laying back on the couch, still high from his latest smoke, he laughed shrilly, “Yeah. Like the help that came to the last four incidents? I bet those walls really helped! We’re screwed!”

Mike grabbed a large chunk of swiss from the fridge and beaned him on the head with it. “We don’t need that shit right now! We need to figure out what to do! This fridge and that pantry over there are not going to last us more then a few weeks at the most you dumb ass.”

A passive looking red head finally looked away from the TV and decided to join the fray. “We need to get out of here. Get to the edge of town and past it. They will build a wall. And we will end up starving, shitting our pants, or worse.”

“Tess,” Sara said with a sneer. “what could be worse then either of those? I’d rather just die right now.”

But Ryan answered. “Dude. You’ve seen the vids online. What they look like after a few days. Shit, none have survived on their own past a week or two.”

Mike sat down on the couch, and offered some urda to everyone then started to talk between mouthfuls. “So the reality is, in a short time the wall will be up, and we have to either survive the standard two months before they come in for clean up ops, or we leave now and risk getting infected.”

Tess spoke up, “They’ve never found a single survivor during clean ups guys.”

“So I guess that means we move now then huh?”

“But what about the guys in suits we saw earlier?” Alice asked. “Won’t they be able to help? Why not wait a bit longer?”

Mike stuffed the last of the cheese in his mouth and shook his head. “Fuck it! I’m leaving now, you guys can wait all you want.” They all watched as he grabbed a bag and filled it with assorted cheeses and some dry crackers. “I’m out of here!”

“Stop! Wait!” Alice yelped, as she lunged to stop him. He turned with a smiled on his face. But instead of a kiss she grabbed into the pack and pulled something out, “Leave the provolone asshole.”

Mike looked dejected as he walked up the stairs towards the front door. He came up even with a low table and reached for one of the weapons resting there. His hand went over several handguns, and instead wrapped around a large screwdriver. He savagely drove it into his waistband before opening the door and walking out into the open air.

Half an hour later the rest of the group was still watching news networks, trying to learn everything they could. As a group they had decided on a large block of manchego cheese, and were halfway through it. Just as CNN announced the next segment would be on the disaster the lights went out, and the TV went dark. The new silence allowed them to hear sounds from outside, like the slow wail of a far off air raid siren.

“What the fuck?” Ryan asked as he lit his lighter for light and to take a hit off a nearby cheese bong.

Tess got behind the TV and started to disconnect the surge protector so if the power came back it wouldn’t ruin the TV. “Just relax. Let’s see what happens.”

They all stopped moving and speaking as an odd sound came from upstairs. They stared upwards as the sound of footsteps going across the floor was easily heard, Tess’s hand was inches from the switch when the power came back on. Everyone in the room turned towards the TV as it flashed to life, afraid that it would give them away. Tess stood up behind it and opened her mouth to tell them to shut it off when she noticed the odd looks on everyone’s face. “What the hell guys?” She whispered.

But they didn’t respond. Instead they kept staring at the screen. Tess started to step around it to turn it off herself when she saw a dark stain running down Alice’s leg, she stopped in terror and looked from face to face looking for a sign that it was a joke. But she saw nothing but blank stares. Then Alice squatted down on the floor and started to slap her hands in the puddle she had just made. Tess moaned in fear as she watched Sara join her. Her eyes darted to Ryan, but his dumb look had turned into a dumb grin.

Just then Tess heard steps coming down the stairs, she ducked back behind the TV, but not before grabbing a few slices of american cheese to fill her mouth.

“Yeah. It worked. Again. The signal did exactly what it was designed for.” A muffled male voice said.

“Just take the pics and write it up. We’ve got two more blocks before we’re done here.” Another stated.

Tess watched as the masked figures worked quietly. Taking copious notes, and pictures of everyone. When they got to Ryan they stepped back surprised. “Hey, we’ve got a clear here.”

“What? Not possible. They ate enough cheese to bring down half the town.”

But the first voice checked further, Then smiled, as he talked down to Ryan, “You like to smoke a lot of pot don’t you?” Ryan lazily nodded. “Well, I bet you feel real good right now huh?” Again the nod. “Well here, try this!” He said as he pushed something close to Ryan’s face. Tess bit down on her hand as she watched Ryan take a sniff and immediately slide off the couch onto the floor. “Game over pothead.”

“Yeah, thankfully this stuff still gets them to high to do much. We might have some fighters if it didn’t. Now pick a sample and let’s get out of here.” The masked man watched as his accomplice went for the younger woman now sitting in her own mess. “Yeah... Figures. Diaper her and get her in the van.” He threw a bag at the man, several items came loose and flew to the floor. “Dammit man, pick that shit up. Let’s go.”

Tess watched as her friend was stripped of everything, then diapered. He didn’t even bother to wipe her off. Then he grabbed her arm and led her up the stairs and out. Tess stayed still for several minutes, listening to make sure the upstairs was clear before making her move. When she was sure she was safe she checked on her remaining friends. It was easy for her to see they were gone. “I need to get out of here. I need to let the world know what’s happening here.” She thought to herself. She grabbed a red backpack and without thinking about it tossed in a few bottles of water, and a can of pasteurized cheese spread. Then she saw what had fallen out of the men’s bag. She reached down it picked one up. “A diaper..” She thought. Then thinking she could use some evidence she picked a few more of them up and tossed them in her bag.

She quietly walked up the stairs, keeping her eyes and ears open for anything, she took one last look at Sara and Ryan, then shook her head and reached for a weapon. Again the handguns were left behind. Instead she grabbed a small hammer and with a sigh walked out the door. The air outside seemed much cooler, and drier. Tess sneaked carefully towards the back of the house and hopped the fence. She was slowly going towards a wooded area that could give her some cover when she heard a door open off to her left. Tess ducked under a large shrubbery and watched as a diapered adult toddled towards the street. She had to repress her urge to run out and stop him. But before he reached the street a large bus had pulled up. Tess watched as the driver opened the door and helped the affected man into the bus.

“Weird. Now what?” She whispered. Tess decided to wait and watch. She ducked from yard to yard, watching as more diapered people toddled, and in some cases crawled out to be picked up. A few times more then one appeared. She finally decided what she would do. After making sure it was empty, she ducked inside a house. She checked every room, finding a middle aged couple asleep in front of a flashing TV. Tess didn’t want to look at anything that might make her regress, so she closed the door and entered the bathroom. Inside she took off her clothes and pulled one of the diapers out. She shook with fear at the thought of what she was about to try. But she had decided it was the only real way. As she taped the diaper on she ran through her plan. “Get on the bus. Stop the driver and drive as fast as possible till I get to a police station or a road block with reporters.”

Naked, except for the diaper and the small hammer hidden inside it Tess waddled out of the house, then started crawling towards the bus. When she knew she was in plain view she started to veer off towards the other side of the street. As she had thought it would, the bus stopped and the driver got out swearing. Tess allowed drool to run out of her mouth and onto the street as the female driver got closer.

Now she could hear her curses. “Dam idiots. I told them to stop doing doubles...” Her grumbling stopped as she neared Tess and roughly picked her up off the ground. Tess felt surprised at the quick action. Her arms were caught at her sides so she couldn’t get the hammer out. She started to shake as she was taken on the bus. Inside it felt cool, and smelled oddly sweet. But as she was taken farther back into the bus the smell grew into what smelled like dozens of stale diapers.

She cried out when she was roughly dropped into what felt like a cool, already wet car seat. She moved her hands, but not before a harness was slapped down on her and tightened in place. She desperately struggled against the harness, but the woman didn’t understand what was really happening, instead she walked away, then came back and shoved a bottle into one of her hands. Tess managed to stop squirming and manage a dumb smile long enough for the driver to look away and curse again as she saw more regressed subjects ready for pickup.

Tess tried to release the straps holding her down but it was no use. She wasn’t getting out. She slowly pulled the hammer out of her diaper, and slid it between her set, and one next to her. As she did so she noticed the seat was occupied. She waited till the driver was outside and took a peak at her neighbor. It was a young man. His chair had been laid back and looked more like an infant carrier, he had pulled his feet up inside and was furiously sucking on one of his toes. “Ewww..” Tess said catching his attention. For a split second they stared at each other then he blew a loud raspberry, covering her face in spit. She reached up to wipe off her face as a memory flashed in her mind. “Physical contact with affected fluids.” Her eyes grew wide as she frantically cleaned her self off. “It wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough...” she kept praying as she did. When her face felt dry she opened her eyes and almost screamed from the face of the driver staring over her. She thought she was caught.

Instead she felt her seat rolled back, and her feet roughly folded up into the base of her chair. “Dam idiots. Keep your mouths shut.” She squeezed at Tess’s diaper. “And I don’t care if you’re wet. You can stay in that till I get you back to HQ in a few hours baby.”

Tess felt like screaming, and the driver saw it. “Oh just drink your bottle baby. I’m tired of this crap already.”

The nipple popped in her mouth, and Tess found herself instantly suckling. She grabbed at the bottle, but instead of ripping it free she held it in her mouth. Inside she knew something was wrong. But the milk tasted so good. “And now that my diaper is wet it feels so warm.” She thought. She had just enough time to realize that was very wrong before she lost her train of thought and just decided to lay back and enjoy the ride.