Wisdom Teeth

Chapter 1
Wisdom Teeth

Charles, “Chaz” to his friends, was sitting in a back corner of the mall; a refugee from midterms, and currently, suffering from a monster toothache. The mall was nothing fancy, but it was a popular hangout for a college student too young to drink. He’d tried several times and failed. Chaz had a young look and a horrible poker face.

The trip to the mall was intended as a celebration for getting through midterms, no small accomplishment: Chaz was a second year aerospace engineering major. He’d gotten a toothache in the last few hours though, and didn’t feel much like celebrating. Browsing through his favorite stores had yielded a little distraction, but things were closing, and he was vaguely annoyed as he hadn’t found any good deals to replace his worn and ragged jeans.

He didn’t want to go back to his dorm; loud music and rowdy roommates could only aggravate the situation. Home was out of the question too; his parents were ?unavailable’, likely on another cruise, or vacation. So he was left on a worn wood bench under a fake fern, trying to figure out where to go.

A flyer on the other side of the alcove caught his eye, mainly because it had a high gloss picture of teeth. He examined it, and found that a local dentist was doing free exams at the mall office that night. Chaz pondered this truly odd coincidence, and was about to dismiss it when another pang hit his mouth. He winced and squeezed the bench to keep from yelling out in pain...and promptly decided a dentist, however odd, couldn’t do much to make this worse.

A quick glance at the mall map told him where the office was, and soon, Chaz was nervously stepping into a small, but immaculate office. A receptionist greeted him and handed him a simple form, which asked his contact information, along with a space for him to list concerns about his teeth. He was just finishing when an older man in a white coat came in.

The dentist ushered Chaz back to an examination room and began the picking and scraping that dentists are known for. “Try to relax for me, Chaz, this’ll go faster if you do,” the man admonished.

Chaz took some deep breaths and caught a relaxing smell: lavender, or some gentle herb. He smiled a little and relaxed as the dentist picked away. Soon, the dentist stopped. “Well Chaz, I see the problem. Your wisdom teeth are coming in and there’s no room for them. I can remove them if you’d like.”

Chaz gulped, “Won’t that be expensive?”

The man shook his head, and with a half-smile said, “Everything tonight is free. It’s a chance to start fresh. Besides, if you don’t have it done tonight, you’ll likely have to wait through the weekend before you can get any work done.”

Chaz nodded. “I suppose that’s true. Won’t it hurt?”

“I can put you under. We’re set up for sedation here.”

Chaz relaxed a little at that. “So I won’t feel anything?”

“Well, you’ll be sore for several days, and the drug may make you feel loopy. Nothing serious though.” The doctor patted the seat and smiled reassuringly.

“Hop up, kiddo.”

Chaz looked at the man oddly, and then decided the dentist was just trying to relax him; that was probably why there was that herb smell, too. He climbed up into the surgery chair and smiled weakly. “Alright. Do your stuff, doc.”

The dentist nodded, flipped a few switches and put a mask over Chaz’s face. A few deep breaths and everything felt fuzzy. He heard the dentist’s voice, sounding very far away. “Alright champ, deep breaths. I’ll just need you to help me with this-“, and then Chaz was so far out he didn’t hear the rest.

Slowly, Chaz began to wake, and he found himself in a different room, covered in a blanket and feeling very thick; even opening his eyes took a Herculean effort. After a few minutes, he managed to pull the blanket off of himself, and set it on the bed, dusting off his overalls out of habit. Mommy always got upset when they got dirty. He tried to wrap his brain around that, but it was moving slow, and it was interrupted by the arrival of a kindly looking woman who took his hand and offered him a big purple sucker. “You were suck a brave boy in there, the dentist said you should get a treat! Suck on it, it’ll help you feel less dizzy.”

Chaz nodded and stuck it in his mouth without even thinking, the big purple swirls looked so inviting, and the sucking and sweetness made him feel a little less disoriented. The nurse led him gently out to the front room, where his mom was waiting. The nurse waked behind Chaz as he ran, still a bit dizzy, to his mom. “Mom? You’re supposed to be on vacation! Why’re you here?” was what he meant to say, but with the sweet in his mouth, it came out all jumbled; it came out more like, “Mom? Yer...here?”

His mother smiled. “I came to get you sweetie. The dentist said you might be a little mixed up after your appointment. Would you like spaghetti for dinner?”

Chaz grinned in spite of his surprise. He didn’t get home for dinner often. But he was really hungry and his mom made great spaghetti. He nodded happily, mumbling unintelligently around the sucker. His mom grinned and thanked the nurse who smiled back. “He behaved perfectly. He’ll be groggy for a while from the treatment, and you’ve got extra suckers for him if he needs. He should be fine in the morning.”

Chaz blinked a little as his mom took his hand, but after a few steps, he realized how much he needed the support. Things weren’t adding up though, it should have been long past dinner time, his mom should have been in the Caribbean or somewhere exotic, and he shouldn’t have had his teeth pulled by this crazy dentist! What had he been thinking?

They found his mom’s car in the lot, as Chaz looked around confused. Hadn’t he brought a car, or maybe his bike? Or had someone brought him over...he didn’t remember. A soft, but firm push from his mom had him crawling into the car and then watching helplessly as he was buckled in. “Mom! I can do it myself!” She smiled and shook her head.

“You’re dizzy, hun, let me help. Just enjoy your lollipop, alright? Try not to get carsick.”

Chaz nodded groggily and sucked away, which certainly relaxed him. The grape berry flavor was so yummy, and he felt so content in the big roomy car! He hoped the lolly would last a while. As he sucked on it, he realized, suddenly, that he was in the back seat! He hadn’t been back there since he was kid! What’s more, he was dressed funny; his t-shirt and grungy jeans were gone, replaced with a gaudy red striped tee, under a loose, cozy pair of overalls. He tried to ask his mom, but the lollipop got in the words mixed up, and every time he pulled it out of his mouth, the whole world seemed to start falling away, so he mumbled around it. “Mom! Somethin’s wrong! Where’re my clothes?”

She looked back. ?You have to wear your clothes, Charlie. I know you’d rather wear nothing, but you can’t. You’re a big boy.”

Chaz wanted to tell his mother that of course he was a big boy, almost an adult! The words weren’t coming though, and his mom didn’t seem to understand him with the sucker in him mouth anyway. The soft hum of the engine and gentle vibrations of the car, on top of the grogginess from getting his teeth pulled soon overwhelmed him and he fell asleep.

Chaz woke up being carried into the living room by his mom. She plopped him down onto a beanbag chair, took off his shoes and said, ?Be a good boy and watch cartoons while Mom makes dinner.’

Cartoons? Chaz shrugged, then flipped on MTV at first, but all the songs were loud and dumb and almost scary so he flipped over to the news; but it was more boring then the music. He surfed a little till he settled on a brightly colored cartoon. It wasn’t something he’d normally watch, but there didn’t seem to be anything else on. Looked like Mom was right after all. Chaz had forgotten how well his mother knew him. She always seemed to know how to make him feel better.

Chaz watched the cartoon, not sure exactly what the cartoon was about, but it was funny to watch, and over all too soon. Why had he found the cartoon so complicated? He looked down at his striped tee and overalls. Had he really put on such a childish outfit this morning?

He was distracted by the sudden knowledge that he had to go to the bathroom. He raced up the stairs, amazed at how steep they were, and found with surprise that he had to step onto a plastic step to use the toilet. There was no fly on the front of his overalls and he wanted to cry as he struggled with the fiddly straps to take his overalls down. He felt even more confused when he discovered he was wearing Spongebob Squarepants briefs.

He still felt so fuzzy, and after using the toilet decided he’d feel better with some cold water on his face. He stepped out of his overalls and saw with annoyance that he had to use another plastic step to see in the mirror above the sink. He splashed his face with cold water and looked at his reflection. His face looked different somehow, but he couldn’t work out what it was. He smiled at himself and was stunned when he realized that his teeth were missing! The two in front! That wasn’t right, the dumb ol’ dentist was supposed to pull the teeth in back. Now he was left with gaps in his front teeth like a little kid!

What was going on? Chaz looked down at his Spongebob briefs and stamped his feet with frustration. He decided that wearing some normal clothes would make him feel better. He ran from the bathroom to his old bedroom, hoping his mom wouldn’t catch him in just his underwear and also hoping there was still some of his clothes in the closet.

His bedroom was another surprise. It was decorated for a boy just starting school: brightly colored wallpaper, short furniture, cartoon posters here and there, and a road playmate with cars and trucks in a corner. It looked like his room from when he was six years old, Chaz realized, just with more modern cartoons. There was a large Cookie Monster plush next to him, and the bed sheets were, to Chaz’s embarrassment, covered in Spongebob Squarepants designs.

Chaz blinked, feeling very confused, and decided the only possible explanation was that he was the subject of an exceptional practical joke. He started hollering, “OK! You can come out now. I’m impressed!”

That’s what he was trying to say anyway. But instead he heard himself call for his mom in such a young-sounding voice, and he blushed as she came quickly up the stairs and into his bedroom.

?What’s wrong sweetie,’ his mom said, not blinking an eye at seeing him in his juvenile underwear.

“Mom, the dentist messed up!” He bore his teeth at his mom, sure that she would be horrified at the mistake.

Instead, his mom picked him up, surprising Chaz at how easily she could carry him, and sat him on her lap on the bed. ?It’s okay, Charlie, he didn’t forget to give me your baby teeth. You were asleep when he took them out, remember, so he gave them to me. We won’t miss the tooth fairy, don’t you worry.’

Chaz squirmed around in his mom’s lap at the sound of his kiddy nickname, “MOM!?”

His mom laughed. ’The sleepy gas sure got you confused, didn’t it Charlie. Don’t you remember the tooth fairy? We’ll put your baby teeth under your pillow and the tooth fairy will come and leave you a whole dollar for each tooth!”

Chaz grinned in spite of himself. Free money, just for sticking his teeth under his pillow? Two dollars! He could buy a new Spidey action figure with that! Or a comic book! And then all the kids in Ms. Spinney’s first grade would be so jealous of him!

But wait...tooth fairy? That was something for little kids, not for big boys. He had to help his mom understand something was wrong so he told her that his teeth weren’t baby teeth. However, the sight of Spongebob all around, on his bed and on his briefs, must have affected his brain, because instead of explaining maturely to his mom that he was too old to have baby teeth, Chaz suddenly realized he was singing the theme from the Spongebob cartoon! He giggled as he wriggled off his mommy’s lap and shouted the chorus, “SPONGE-BOB SQUARE-PANTS!”, and then fell to the floor in a giggling fit.

His mommy smiled at the boy giggling on her floor, and Charlie looked up, confused at his own behavior. He wanted to be embarrassed by his mom seeing him like this, giggling and wearing nothing but underwear a kindergartener would be proud of. But he wasn’t, he was having so much fun! He felt goofy and loopy and so he ran up and hugged her tight around the legs. “Can I go watch ?toons Mommy?”

His mommy picked him up and swung him around, obviously not upset or surprised by seeing Chaz in nothing but his undies. “What about your supper? Don’t you want to sit at the table with Mommy like a big boy?’

Chaz giggled. The groggy buzz in his brain left him feeling so silly and playful. “Nuhuh, mommy! Wanna watch Spongebob!”

His mommy laughed. ”Well, the dentist said you might not be hungry after the special sleepy gas, Charlie. One show and then bed. But you need to get dressed for bed first.”

Charlie’s mommy opened up his closet and pulled out a soft and cozy looking red and blue bundle and set it on the bed. “Arms up, tiger!” She assisted this instruction with a few light tickles on Charlie’s sides and underarms.

He squealed and shoved his arms up, helping mommy slide the bright blue and red superman shirt on. Mommy picked him up, set him on the bed, and slid the footed bottoms on him. Charlie sat there slightly stunned. The jammies were so soft and fuzzy, smelling of fresh laundry soap, unlike anything he’d worn in years. Superman was pretty cool though, and now he could go watch TV, but sitting there in his special pajamas, so soft and cuddly, his mommy rubbing his back, he realized how sleepy he was.

?Time for Superman to go to sleep, right Charlie?’ his mommy said with a smile, and Charlie didn’t protest as his mommy tucked him into bed.

Charlie’s mommy lifts up his pillow for a moment. ?There, sweetie, your baby teeth are ready for the Tooth Fairy. If you go straight to sleep like a good boy I’m sure the Fairy will have left you some money in the morning!’

Charlie nodded drowsily, looking up at his mommy with heavy eyes. And as he quickly drifted into dreams of Spongebob and comic books, he decided it was worth going to the dentist after all.