Restitution

Chapter 1
Start to Finish

“Boys?” Mary called as she poked her head out from the kitchen. “Could one of you help me out in here?”

In the living room her two sons sat side-by-side, typing away at their laptops at a furious pace - as they had been for the past two hours. She slouched and frowned.

“Boys...”

“Yeah mom.” Ken called back without taking his eyes from the screen or his hands from the keyboard. “Did you need something?”

The woman shook her head and waved her hand.

“Never mind.” She said as she disappeared back into the

kitchen.

Ken looked up and watched her go. With a sigh he pulled back from his laptop and began rubbing his temples - he may have been engrossed in his work but not so much that he couldn’t tell when his mother was upset. He certainly didn’t blame her for feeling that way - after all, it had been years since he and his brother were home at the same time and since arriving last night they had spent nearly every minute of their visit taking care of their respective responsibilities. Ken glanced over at his younger brother Aaron, who was filling the screen with text in an attempt to finish off the thesis that would determine whether or not he would graduate from college in a couple weeks. It put a nostalgic little smile on his face - it had only been two years ago when he himself had worked furiously to complete his degree, dedicating every waking moment of his life to the creation of a thesis that would pay proper tribute to his impressive college career. He was successful - and his reward was immediate employment from a very important company that had him on the management fast track from day one. Since then it seemed like he had been living the final days of his senior year over and over again, burdened with a new project seemingly every week, each task more important than the last. Ken couldn’t say with any certainty if he was happy that his little brother was walking the same path he was - or even if he was happy, period. Aaron paused and looked over at his big brother, having finally taken notice of his staring.

“What?” Aaron asked. He gestured at Ken’s computer. “You better get back to work if you’re going to have that project finished before you get back to the office on Monday.”

“I’ll be all right.” He said. “I was thinking that maybe we should be spending a little bit more time with mom. She’s bending over backwards to try and put this family reunion together and I’m almost positive that the only reason she set it up in the first place was so she could see us again.”

Aaron snorted and returned to his work. “No kidding. I only agreed to come down here because she wouldn’t stop bugging me about it. I’m taking off before the rest of the family gets here.”

“You’re what?”

“We came, didn’t we? I don’t know about you but I don’t feel obligated to stick around, especially if it means dealing with the rest of the clan. You know how annoying they can be.”

Ken frowned. He couldn’t deny that he wasn’t looking forward to the rest of the family’s arrival. When they were kids it seemed as though they received a visit every other month from an aunt or uncle or a doting grandparent. The occasions were fun when they were little - but as they grew up their relatives still treated them like the babies they loved to fuss over years ago. Ken couldn’t help but wonder if his mother had encouraged that attitude in order to try and make up for some of the aspects of childhood he and his brother had lost - not that they had much of a childhood to begin with. Their father had skipped town shortly after Aaron was born, forcing mom to work two jobs to support their family and pay for the myriad of babysitters that took care of her boys. Ken couldn’t even imagine how difficult that had been for her - not only because she had to dedicate herself to work in order to raise children that she never got to see, but because when she did get to see them she had to feel as though she were looking at miniature versions of the man that had abandoned them so many years ago. From looking at old pictures of his father there was no denying that both he and his brother possessed many of his features, from the dark chestnut hair to the deep blue eyes that had undoubtedly attracted their mother in the first place.

It wasn’t until Ken was ten - a very mature ten - that his mother felt he was old enough to look after himself and his brother. While most people’s childhoods were filled with memories of sleepovers, family vacations and endless summer afternoons, Ken could only recall days spent playing at parenthood, doing everything in his power to keep their family together while he watched his youth pass him by like a freight train bound for brighter lands. And he knew that if he stayed, seeing their relatives again would do nothing but bring those painful memories to the forefront once more. Plus, he wasn’t looking forward to another night spent sleeping on the couch - according to their mother the bedroom they had shared as children was being renovated, leaving the couches in the living room as the only option.

“Don’t you think it’d upset mom if we just up and left?” Ken asked in an attempt to find fault with the idea. Aaron looked up and grinned.

“Oh, it’s we now, is it?” Ken gave him a wilting look which Aaron just laughed at. “Listen, we both came clear across the country to be here, taking time off to make the trip when neither of us could afford to do so. My conscience is clear.”

Ken looked at his brother, at the expression that he had seen so many times before. Their youth hadn’t been easy on him either. As they grew up Aaron was always trying to prove that he was strong enough to not need Ken’s help - or anybody else’s for that matter. Still, whenever he put his hands on his hips and declared that he could do something by himself, the same look would always come over his face, an odd little smirk that made him look like an indifferent teenager. Ken tried his best to respect his independence - and ignored the soft sobs that would sometimes float down from the bunk bed above him. Without a doubt Aaron was doing the same thing now, trying his best to emotionally distance himself from the situation in hopes that he could make it hurt a little less - but even if that was the case, Ken couldn’t find any fault with anything his little brother had said. We did go out of our way just to be here, he reasoned. And it’s not like mom’ll be lonely or anything after we leave - after all, within an hour this house will be crawling with relatives. She’ll be fine. I’m sure she’ll be fine.

“Are you boys excited to see everybody again?” As if on cue Mary swept into the room, smiling from ear-to-ear as she put a tray of lemonade down on the coffee table. Aaron looked over at Ken, who swallowed and offered their mother a genial smile.

“Uh, listen mom.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Me and Aaron have been talking, and as much as we’d like to stick around, I think it’s best if we get going.”

Aaron nodded beside him. Their mother cocked her head and regarded them with a small frown.

“Are you sure?” She said. “Everybody was looking forward to seeing you guys again. They’re going to be really disappointed if you’re not here.”

“I’m really sorry, mom.” Ken said. “But you know how busy the both of us are - the longer we stay the further we fall behind on our work. We can visit again when things are a little less crazy.”

Mary was frozen in her expression and for a moment it looked as though she might cry at what she had just heard. But, to the brothers’ surprise, all she did was straighten up, clear her throat, and put on a gracious smile.

“Of course.” She said in a calm, even tone. “I understand. You’re both young men now, after all, and there are people out there that depend on you. It would be selfish of me to keep you from them.”

Ken and Aaron looked at each other, similarly surprised at how well she was taking this. Mary picked up a glass and raised it in the air.

“Let’s have a toast.” She declared. “To the men you’ve become.”

Confused but pleased that they had avoided an awkward situation, both boys set aside their laptops and grabbed a glass, clinking them with their mother’s before taking a healthy swig. Aaron smacked his lips and looked at his drink.

“This is delicious.” He said. “I had forgotten how good your lemonade was, mom.”

“Mmm hmm.” Ken agreed as he finished his glass. Within a few seconds all three were drained.

“Well, I suppose I should help you get your things together.” Suddenly Mary’s eyes widened, as though struck by a thought. “Oh! I almost forgot - I wanted you boys to see your old bedroom before you left.”

“I thought you said it was still being renovated.” Ken said.

“Oh, that was just a little fib.” She said. “You boys looked so tired when you got in last night. They did such a wonderful job and it would have been a crime if you had been sleepy your first time seeing it.”

Ken and Aaron looked at each other and shrugged, figuring that they could at least grant their mother this small request before taking off.

“This way, this way.” Mary said, leading her boys down the hall with unabashed enthusiasm. She opened the door at the end and gestured for them to enter. “Go on in! You’re going to be so surprised, I can’t wait until I see your faces.”

“Okay, jeez, we’re going.” Ken said with a little laugh. “Calm down a little - ”

Ken took two steps into the room and stopped cold. Aaron had been looking down and didn’t get a view of what his brother had seen until he was beside him, his eyes widening as he took in the scene that surrounded them. It wasn’t that everything they had left behind was gone - they had expected that their mother would completely clear the room in hopes of making it a little more mature, in case a relative wanted to stay the night or she decided to make some money by renting it out. What they saw was the total opposite. The walls had been painted baby blue, providing a relatively calm backdrop against the bright colors of the dresser and the toy chest that had been pushed up against them. Those pieces of furniture split the room down the middle - on one side lay a wooden bed designed for a young boy, the headboard and footboard masterfully sculpted to look like a vintage steam train. On the other were the trappings necessary for someone a little younger. In the corner sat a beautiful stained oak crib with a mobile of planets and stars hung above, turning ever so delicately in the gentle breeze that flowed in from the open window. Truly, every bit of furniture in the room looked as though it had been created lovingly by hand, right down to the snow-white changing table against the wall, which sat well stocked in anticipation of its next guest.

“...are you planning on running a daycare, mom?” Ken asked when he could finally speak. He turned towards his mother to see her close the door and shake her head with a playful little smile on her face.

“Then who’s the room for?”

Her smile widened.

“You.” She turned to Aaron. “And you, too.”

Ken and Aaron blinked before simultaneously breaking out in laughter.

“That’s very funny, mom.” Aaron chuckled. “Though I gotta say, the decorators did a great job. The kids that get to use this room are really, really lucky.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that.” Mary beamed. “I remembered how much the both of you liked trains when you were little - so when Ken gets too big for the bed you can move right into it.”

In an instant the brothers were stone sober. A moment passed before Ken stepped towards his mother and spoke up.

“Listen, mom.” He said with a gentle smile on his face. “I know it’s been difficult not having us around, but you’re going to have to move on sometime. You can’t keep living in the past forever, y’know?”

“Not anymore.” She whispered, her eyes shining. “It’s not the past anymore.”

Ken frowned and began pondering what steps he would need to take to have her committed...but his thoughts were interrupted by a pins-and-needles sensation spreading over his skin, as though his whole body were falling asleep. Ken furrowed his brow and took a step back, rattled by the sheer strangeness of the bizarre feelings that had overtaken his body. Out of the corner of his eye he saw that his brother was seemingly dealing with the same situation, bringing his trembling hands up to his face as though they would provide some clue as to what he was experiencing. But behind those hands there was something going on that Ken couldn’t quite put his finger on. He peered closer - and choked on his gasp when he realized what it was.

“Aaron.” Ken swallowed. His younger brother looked up with an expression of confusion that was slowly giving way to fear. “There’s something happening to you.”

Aaron’s eyes widened.

“You too.”

“Isn’t it wonderful?” Both brothers turned to see their mother regarding them with a combination of pride and sheer unflappable joy. “I know you’re scared, boys, but everything is going to be okay. I promise.”

“Mom, what are you talking about?” Aaron cried, sounding as though he were on the verge panic. “Did you do this to us?”

“Oh, it’s just a little something I put in the lemonade.” She said. “Don’t worry, sweetheart, it’s completely safe, and it’ll be over in a few minutes.”

“What’ll be over?” Aaron interrupted. “What’s happening to us?”

Their mother’s expression melted into one of gentle understanding.

“Isn’t it obvious, honey?” She said in a voice so soft that it was nearly a whisper. “You’re getting younger. You and Ken are going to be my sweet little boys again.”

“Stop kidding around!” Aaron shouted. “This isn’t funny anymore!”

“Aaron.”

“What?!”

“She’s telling the truth.”

Aaron snapped in Ken’s direction...to see not a junior executive on his way up the corporate ladder but a baby-faced college kid, his face clear of the stress lines and dark circles that had come with deadlines, obligations, and a hundred all-nighters. Meanwhile Ken was witnessing the same changes occurring in his little brother, watching as the strength and stature he had attained in his college years were replaced by the lanky inelegance of a kid finishing up high school. A smattering of acne appeared as his facial hair grew thin and scraggly, a far cry from the full beard he had grown over his sophomore and junior years.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t ask you boys first.” Both brothers were distantly aware of their mother’s voice, hearing it as though through a loudspeaker that had been placed underwater. “But I knew you would say no. I know how much the both of you value your independence.”

Ken was now squarely in high school, his sharp, distinct features giving way to the soft roundness of youth. Meanwhile Aaron looked as he did the way he did when he graduated from eighth grade, everything about him gawky and disjointed, possessing at the same time the height of a man and the freckles of a little boy. It seemed as though he was gaining a new one with each passing second as he rapidly approached puberty from the wrong direction - and then barreled right through it. For a few moments it seemed as though the transformation went into overdrive, as the process that had changed Aaron from boy to man was reversed with brutal efficiency. Body hair retracted and disappeared into clear, smooth skin. Muscle vanished. And as his height plunged downwards pants that had been sagging finally fell away, leaving the boy draped in a polo shirt that hung down to his knobby little knees. His face red and his eyes brimming with tears, the boy snatched them back up around his waist, looking up at his older brother as though he could make everything better just by wishing it so.

Truth be told, Ken might have even been more terrified than his little brother, having seen what happened to him and knowing that he was next. Already he was on the precipice that Aaron had stood on before being dragged back into childhood - and then he too found himself plummeting into his formative years. In a matter of seconds he regained the endearingly awkward features that were such a source of embarrassment in old family photos, from the ears that stuck out of the side of his head like cardboard flaps to the adorable button nose that just begged to be tweaked. Cheeks grew round and rosy while his hair reverted to the soft curls that his uncles loved to ruffle. When his own pants fell Ken made no movement to retrieve them, leaving them pooled up at his feet as his Oxford shirt continued its slow creep over his increasingly puny form. He looked down at himself and then at Ken, who was tumbling through his elementary school years at a terrifying pace. They were both undeniably little boys now - and the process showed no signs of stopping. Ken turned to his mother, who had a hand on her mouth and a tear rolling down her cheek, as though overcome by what she was witnessing.

“Mom - ” Ken cringed at his boyish timber. “You’ve got to listen to me. I know that the thought of never seeing us again must tear you up inside. But do you realize what you’re doing to us, mom? You’re taking our lives away!”

Mary smiled and shook her head.

“That’s not true.” She said. “I’m giving you the lives you never had. This isn’t just about me, Ken. I wouldn’t be that selfish to do this just for my own reasons. This is about you boys getting the childhoods you deserve.”

Ken cringed. “Mom - ”

“You don’t need to say anything, sweetheart.” She lowered herself to one knee and looked deep into her son’s eyes. “I know how hard you worked to keep things together and I’m so grateful for that. But now it’s time to let me be your mother - and you two can just concentrate on being the happiest little boys in the whole wide world.”

Mary turned to Aaron and began stroking his hair, which seemed to grow lighter and softer with each pass of her hand. The boy sniffled back a tear and looked up her with impossibly blue eyes that yearned for comfort.

“Oh, Aaron.” She sighed. “I know it must have been every bit as difficult on you as it was on your big brother. But you don’t have to think about it anymore. Mommy’s going to take care of everything. She won’t let anything happen to her sweet little baby.”

Ken saw Aaron shiver at their mother’s words. As bizarre as this whole situation was, his little brother couldn’t have thought that he’d grow young enough to be a...a...Ken didn’t even want to think the word, as though doing so would make real what had already become very clear. He was so small, so far away from the man he had been. Swamped in his shirt and still holding up his pants in an attempt to maintain his dignity, Aaron looked as though he were getting ready for his first day of Kindergarten, having dressed up in daddy’s clothes in some adorably misguided perception of what “big boys” wore to school. And still he shrank. His munchkin hands disappeared beneath his shirt sleeves. Cheeks plumped in the most visible indicator of the baby fat that was smothering his little body. Despite the morbid fascination he felt at watching his brother tumble into toddlerhood Ken managed to tear his eyes away from the transformation long enough to look down and take stock of how young he had become. He lifted his feet - cringing at how easily he plucked them from his oversized shoes - and wiggled the little pink toes at the end of his bite-sized appendages. It filled Ken with dread to see how scrawny the legs leading down there had become, and it didn’t make him feel any better to watch them grow stubbier and pudgier with each passing moment.

When Ken looked up it was just in time to see his little brother finally grow too small to hold up his shirt. It just so happened that at the same time the boy lost his grip on his pants, causing his entire wardrobe to fall to the ground in one fell swoop. The boy squeaked in embarrassment and clamped his hands over his groin, his entire body turning red as his mother laughed at his shyness. It was only then that Ken was struck with the full scope of what was happening. Minutes ago Aaron had been a man on the verge of bursting out into the world - and now he was a naked little toddler, complete with round tummy, two sets of rosy cheeks and a tiny little boyhood that he desperately hid from his giggling mother.

Finally, mercifully, the sensation faded away and the transformation came to a halt. Ken took a deep breath and looked down at himself. A low moan escaped his lips when he realized that he hadn’t fared much better than his brother. Though his body hadn’t succumbed to the vestiges of toddlerhood it wasn’t as though he had avoided them altogether. If he had to guess - and to even do so filled Ken with despair - he would say that pre-school was definitely in his near future. When he looked up Ken realized that his mother was looming, towering over him with a playful smile on her face.

“I don’t think it’s fair that Aaron is the only little jaybird in this room.” She said as she took hold of his shirt. “And besides, we’ll need to get you into some new clothes anyway...so off it goes!”

Ken’s eyes widened.

“Mom, no!”

His protests were ignored as his mother ripped the last connection to his manhood from his body. As Aaron had done just moments ago, Ken turned beet red and moved to cover his shame. As the boys stood burning with humiliation in their identically adorable stances their mother couldn’t help but let out a little laugh.

“I’m sorry.” She managed. “But you boys are just too cute. There’s no point in being modest - I’ve seen them before and I’ll be seeing them again. You boys are much too young to bathe yourselves, after all. And Aaron, somebody’s got to do the diapering until you’re potty trained again.”

At that moment, Aaron looked even more terrified than he had during the process that had brought him to this point.

“No.” He piped as he shook his head with wide, disbelieving eyes. “You can’t be serious.”

Mary made no effort to convince him - instead, all she did was reach down, take him under the arms, and hoist him into the air. Aaron cried out and began to kick his pudgy little legs in protest, at that moment looking like any other toddler that wanted to stay naked a little while longer. His mother’s actions had left Aaron completely exposed and Ken couldn’t help but notice the dinky little toy that had replaced his big manly penis. Ken had tried not to think about what had happened to that particular region - so to see his little brother’s manhood reduced to a stubby, pink little organ was nearly too much for him to handle. Morbid curiosity overtook him and he found himself peeking beneath his little hands - and was greeted by the sight of his itty-bitty wee-wee hiding underneath. Ken choked out a sob and wiped his eyes. This is real, he thought. This is actually happening.

“Stop fussing, Aaron.” Mary said in a gentle voice. “We’re going to be doing a lot of this until you’re ready for big boy pants, so you might as well get used to it.”

Ken was snapped to attention by his mother’s voice and the screaming of his little brother as he fought desperately to keep what little dignity he had left. Aaron was trying his hardest but he didn’t know that his mother had a secret weapon in this fight. With one hand holding him down, Mary opened the drawer beneath the changing pad, reached in...and pulled out a baby-blue pacifier. Aaron was struggling and flailing so much that he didn’t even catch sight of it until his mother guided it into his mouth. The toddler’s eyes shot open as though in shock and it appeared as though he would immediately spit it out...but that was before his lips curled around the rubber nipple and began to suck away. Aaron calmed down almost immediately, his tantrum reduced to low whines as Mary set about her task.

Curious despite himself, Ken drew closer as their mother grabbed Aaron’s ankles and lifted his little bottom into the air so that she could slide the diaper underneath. The crinkling and the feel of it beneath clearly mortified the toddler but he put up little fight - even when Mary squirted a generous dollop of lotion in her hands and rubbed it into his baby-soft skin all he did was whimper and wriggle in a half-hearted protest of a process that couldn’t be stopped. Once the front was closed up Mary grinned and gave Aaron’s tummy a quick tickle, drawing an involuntary giggle from the distraught little boy. She plucked him off the table and set him down next to Ken, who looked at his brother as though he had grown a third eye. Though he had witnessed everything first-hand, Ken still had a hard time believing that the toddler sucking away at a pacifier as he wobbled in a diaper with tiny stars and planets on its waistband and was truly his little brother.

“Okay!” Mary said as she turned her attention to Ken. “Since you’re the big boy, Ken, you get to wear the big boy pants.”

Though Ken certainly wasn’t looking forward to donning cartoon briefs again he had to at least admit that it was better fate than had befallen his brother. But the boy’s expectations were shattered when his mother pulled open a dressed drawer, fished around for a moment, and emerged with a pair of training pants. Ken took a step back and put a hand up.

“Mom, wait!” He cried. “I don’t need those!”

“Well, let’s just be safe for now.” Mary said as she approached. “Once you prove to me that you can stay dry all day we’ll get you some proper undies, okay?’

Ken began to protest but didn’t see the point. With a little sniffle he hung his head and lifted his legs, allowing his mother to pull the training pants up around his waist. Though Ken took a little comfort in knowing that his nudity had finally been done away with, that comfort was quickly washed away when he looked down at the soft absorbent garment and realized that the most important task he would be charged with in the coming weeks would be to not soak the smiling teddy bears that adorned the crotch.

“Oh, just look at you two.” She drew close and pulled her boys into a big hug. “This is so wonderful. It’s just so wonderful.”

The brothers seemed unconvinced, looking away with fear and shame in their eyes. Mary sighed and put on a sad little smile as she started to rub their shoulders.

“I know this is scary for you boys.” She said. “And I know that I wasn’t there for you when you needed me. But this time I’m ready. I’m going to do anything I can to make sure you boys enjoy every moment of your second chance.”

Ken looked up with an adorable little frown on his face.

“Could we at least get some more clothes?” He asked in a small voice. His mother smiled and ruffled his hair.

“Oh, we can worry about that later.” She said. “It’s warm out and I’m sure you’re going to want to play outside with all your little cousins.”

The doorbell rang. Mary beamed.

“That must be them now.” She said. “Mommy’ll be right back, boys. Your aunts and uncles are so excited to see you.”

She gave each boy a kiss on the forehead before leaving the room. They watched her go - and all of a sudden they were alone, standing next to the piles of their former clothing dressed only in the undergarments that befit their current ages. Aaron turned to his brother.

“Ken?”

“Yeah?”

“Cuh oo tay dif ow?” He asked, mumbling around the pacifier. “I caht.”

“You can’t?” Despite the situation Ken felt himself smile. “Or you don’t want to?”

Aaron blushed and looked at his feet. Ken sighed and plucked the pacifier from his mouth.

“Thanks.” Aaron muttered, his speech now only impaired by his lisp.

“You’re welcome.”

Silence hung heavy between them.

“Ken?”

“Yeah?”

Aaron played with his pudgy little hands.

“Do you think that what mom said was true?” He murmured. “That we can actually be...kids this time?”

Ken looked at his brother, at the wide, sapphire eyes that looked at him with such trust, such hope. The sight melted his heart. He lowered himself to his knees and took Aaron by the shoulders.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen.” He said, softly. “But I will know that I’ll be here for you every step of the way.”

Aaron managed a little smile.

“Mom said you didn’t have to pretend to be the dad anymore.”

“No.” Ken said, shaking his head. “This time, I’m your big brother. Don’t you ever forget that. Okay?”

Aaron’s smile widened a little bit as he nodded. Ken pulled the boy into a hug and held him close.

“...just wait until you see them, you won’t believe it...”

Their mother’s voice floated in from the living room, leading the cacophony of murmurs that no doubt belonged to their approaching relatives. Ken looked down the hall and then back at his brother.

“You ready?”

Aaron nodded. Ken grinned. He took his little brother’s hand and stood by his side, ready for whatever was coming their way...ready to be the big brother Aaron always deserved.

 

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