Deal With The Devil

Chapter 1
Deal With The Devil

Chapter Description: A man tries to beat the devil by wording his requests to keep from being sent to hell when he dies. However, the devil is not fooled... (note: this is part of a story collection that I'm working on but this fit here)

DEAL WITH THE DEVIL

He was excited, but also more than a bit scared.  It wasn't every day
that you tried to summon the devil and make a deal. Of course, he had
thought everything through and knew he had come up with a way to keep
his soul.

Smiling, he drew the diagram, added the symbols and lit the candles. He
hoped he did everything right. It would suck if he went through all this
trouble and did something stupid that would end up destroying him.

He waited until the proper hour and began the chant that would call the
devil to him.

Once he finished, he waited to see what would happen. After a few
minutes, he frowned. Nothing was happening.

Did he do something wrong? Was one of the symbols not right? Did he
mispronounce a word or two? Would he have to start over on another night
or should he just give up?

Just then, smoke started to fill the room and he coughed. Did one of the
candles get knocked over and set something on fire? He couldn't see any
signs of flames and nothing was glowing, so he figured that wasn't it.
So what was happening?

There was a flash of light that blinded him and he staggered back with a
yelp of surprise. Once his eyes cleared, he saw a beautiful red-headed
woman standing in the circle he had drawn.

"Surprised?" she asked, smiling. "I'm certain I'm not what you were
expecting at all."

"W...what?" he stammered.

The woman laughed softly. "Typical. You summon the devil and your
surprised by what shows up. I gather you expected something more like
this."

There was another flash and a horned creature with great leathery wings,
a spiked tail, and flames glowing in its eyes appeared. "Is this more
like what you expected?" it growled.

A strangled sound escaped his lips as he tried to crawl away. There was
a third flash and the red-headed woman stood before him again.

"I dropped that form centuries ago," she said with a smile. "Too
theatrical. I much prefer this one. Besides, it always confuses people
when they hear that I'm the devil and it never fails to make me laugh."

He stopped moving and looked at her closely.

She was beautiful, that much was certain. Her long red hair flowed down
her back in loose waves, she seemed to be wearing what looked like a
green pantsuit with matching pumps, and it seemed that she wore very
little make up. Her lips had been colored a dark pink shade, and her
eyelids seemed to have a silvery eyeshadow on them.

"You..." he began but stopped for a moment to collect his thoughts.
"You're the devil?" he asked.

"At your service," the woman replied with a slight nod of her head. "You
may call me Lucinda."

He couldn't help but stare. This wasn't anything like he was expecting.
Then his jaw dropped as Lucinda stepped out of the circle, walked across
the room and sat down on his couch.

"I hate to be rude," she said, "but could we hurry this up? I have a few
other appointments to finish today."

"I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't think you'd be able to..."

Lucinda nodded. "I know. You thought the circle would hold me in place.
I only stay put because it usually makes things easier. To be honest,
all the rituals do absolutely nothing. Although the chanting or spells
do get my attention, I only appear if I want to."

"Oh," he said. This was too confusing but he didn't want to waste time
in trying to figure it out either. He had a plan in mind and he wanted
to get started.

"Well," he began, "I know I have to sign a contract..."

Lucinda waved a hand. "Let's not waste time with minor details, shall
we? We both know that you called me here for a reason. You summoned the
devil because you want to make a deal. Am I right?"

He nodded. "If it's permitted, I would like to ask for three things.
I'll sign a contract if you want but..."

"I usually don't bother with such trivial things but, in your case, I
can make an exception," Lucinda said, smiling. "What would you like?"

He smiled. He knew he'd have to be fairly specific in what he asked for.
He didn't want to give the devil any loopholes she could use to screw
him over.  After thinking about it for a few moments, he smiled. If he
played his cards right, he'd be able to beat the devil at her own game.

"I presume from the smile on your face, you figured out what you want,"
Lucinda said.

"I have," he said. "As I said, I would like three things. Once I tell
you what they are, I'll sign a contract so there are no
misunderstandings. Is that okay?"

Lucinda smiled back. "Completely acceptable. As per custom, I'll sign it
with you and, even though it's not my usual procedure, I'll even throw
in a bonus."

"A bonus?" he asked, suspiciously.

Lucinda nodded. "You may add any condition you like and I'll follow it
to the letter. Also, it won't count as one of the things you'll ask for.
Think of it as a free gift."

He smiled again. This was going even better than he thought it would.
Once he asked for what he wanted, he'd have the life he always dreamed
of and he wouldn't have to worry about going to hell when he died.

"I hate to sound bitchy," Lucinda said, "but I would like to finish this
sometime tonight. I have a dinner date with the wife later and she hates
it when I'm late."

Wife? he thought. Then he shook his head. The idea of the devil being
married wasn't important right now.

"Sorry," he said. "This is still a bit shocking."

"I understand," Lucinda replied. "But you were saying?"

He nodded. "Right. Well, if possible, I'd like to be taken care of. To
not have to lift a finger for anything."

Lucinda nodded. "That could be arranged. What else?"

"Well," he continued, "I'd like be enchanting to women. Not exactly
irresistible to the point where I'm followed every place I go and can't
get away, I'm not that stupid, but enough so that they fuss over me."

"To have them say how cute you are, how precious, things like that,
right?" Lucinda asked.

"Yes!" he said. "That!"

"Not a problem," Lucinda said, putting her arm on the back of the sofa
and resting her head on her hand. "And what was the third thing you
wanted?"

He smiled again. This was almost too easy. "The last thing I would like
is eternal youth. To never grow old."

"Ah, the typical dream," Lucinda said, giggling. "I can give you that
too. And since you seem to expect a contract, let's get that out of the
way. Unless you want to amend some of your requests?"

He just shook his head and smiled. "I think I'm good."

Lucinda waved and a contract appeared on the table, a pen lying on top.

"Just sign where it's highlighted," she said.

He looked at the contract for a moment. "Will I be signing in blood? And
where's the condition I was supposed to add?" he asked.

"I haven't used blood to sign contracts for millennia. I think a regular
pen will do quite nicely. As for the condition, just tell me what it is
and it'll appear on the contract," Lucinda said. "I know I have a
reputation of breaking the rules, or at least twisting them to my
advantage, but I do give people what they ask for."

He looked up from the contract. "The condition can be anything I want?"
he asked.

"Anything at all," Lucinda replied. "Just state what it is."

He looked at Lucinda and said, "I want this contract to be completely
binding. That nothing can be done to break it or take away what you give
me. Once I put my name down, then it's forever."

"As you wish," Lucinda said, smiling again. "Once we sign, then even God
couldn't undo what is done."

He almost laughed as he picked up the pen and signed his name. Then he
handed the pen to Lucinda who signed underneath his signature. He
couldn't help smiling as he thought of what he'd be getting. And he
didn't even have to worry about being sent to hell since he would live
forever. Everything was going according to plan.

"There," Lucinda said. "All signed and sealed. You'll have exactly what
you asked for."

"And nothing can change it once it's done, right?" he asked.

Lucinda nodded. "As agreed, once you have what you asked for, nothing
will be able to undo it."

"And when will I get it?" he asked.

Lucinda rolled the contract up and it vanished in a puff of smoke. "Very
soon.  And I see the look of worry on your face but you have nothing to
fear. I didn't destroy the contract; I just sent it to my office so I
could file it away once I get back. Despite my reputation among you
humans, I do keep my word."

"I can't wait," he said, smiling happily. "This is wonderful."

"Well, since we've made a deal and signed the contract to finalize
things, I have no problem with granting you what you most desire,"
Lucinda said, smiling. "I hope you enjoy it."

Then with a clap of thunder and a flash of light, everything
disappeared.



***



When he opened his eyes again, he found it hard to focus. He felt weird
but he wasn't too surprised by that. He was certain it would take him a
little while to get used to whatever the devil did to him.

"It won't take all that long," he heard a female voice say. "In fact,
you should be back to normal in a few minutes."

"Who?" he mumbled.

"You should remember me," the voice said. "You had me in your apartment
just a moment ago."

"L...Lucinda? You...you're still here?" he stammered.

Lucinda giggled. "Of course I am, silly," she replied. "I couldn't leave
without explaining things to you."

As his eyes cleared, he saw that he was surrounded by what seemed to be
bars, but they didn't look like anything he was familiar with. Even
stranger, they seemed to be painted white. They did remind him of
something but he couldn't figure out what.

"I know it's confusing for you," Lucinda said, leaning on the top of the
railing. "Let me explain."

He tried to sit up so he could listen, but found he couldn't move. He
was a little concerned about that but figured it would take a little
while before he was fully recovered. He thought it would be easier to
just lie where he was and see what the devil had to say.

"If you remember, you asked for three things. You wanted to be taken
care of, to have women fawn over you, and you wanted immortality. Isn't
that right?" she asked.

He could only nod, wondering why she seemed to tower over him.  What was
going on here?

Lucinda smiled even more. "Well, you left things open to interpretation,
so I gave you exactly what you asked for. If I'm not mistaken, a bit of
an answer will be coming your way in just a moment."

He was about to ask her what she meant when he felt a warmth at his
crotch. It couldn't be possible but it seemed he had wet himself!

Still smiling, Lucinda nodded. "You did indeed," she said. "You see, I
did grant your requests. I just didn't give them to you the way you
expected."

"What do you mean?!" he yelled. "What did you do to me?!"

Lucinda straightened up. "Let's go over it one more time, shall we?" she
asked, counting the points on her fingers. "One, you wanted to be taken
care of. To not have to lift a finger was how you said it, right? Or
something along those lines? Second, you wanted women to fawn all over
you, say how cute you are, and things like that. And, if I'm not
mistaken, the third thing was that you wanted to live forever."

"I never said I wanted to live forever!" he yelled back. "I said I
wanted eternal youth!"

Lucinda laughed. "Po-tay-to, po-tah-to. But, in a sense, I did give you
that." Then she picked up a mirror and held it over him. "You will
never, ever, grow any older."

His eyes bugged out when he saw a baby wearing a frilly pink dress and
booties looking back at him.

"You're absolutely adorable, you know," Lucinda said, giggling again. "I
don't think there are too many women who wouldn't be enchanted by such a
cute little baby like you. A nurse will be in to change your diaper in a
moment, and then I think it'll be time for your bottle. After that, I
believe you'll be strapped in a stroller for a little walk around the
garden. They do like to stick to a schedule in this place. From what I
hear, government facilities are like that. And they're going to do
everything they can to figure out why you don't age. The note left in
your basket when you were found on the steps told them that. Of course,
they'll never find the answer but that won't stop them from running
every conceivable test trying to figure it out."

"What did you do to me?!" he screamed. "I didn't want this! Change me
back!"

Lucinda shook her head. "I'm sorry, but I can't do that. You had it
written into the contract that after we both signed, nothing could undo
what happened. And if you didn't want to be a baby forever, maybe you
should have been more specific in your requests."

"Get me out of here!" he screamed again. "I'll do anything you want!"

Lucinda frowned. "I'm sorry but, even if I could do that, I wouldn't.
You thought you were being so clever. You thought you could beat the
devil by asking for eternal life. Oh, you didn't say that, of course.
You couldn't give away your plan, right? But we both know what you were
doing. You figured if you lived forever, I wouldn't be able to claim
your soul. However, there are many kinds of hell, sweetpea. And you're
going to be living in yours forever. An eternity of diapers, pretty
dresses, bottle feedings, pacifiers, baby food, and everything else that
comes with a baby life. And don't think that you can somehow let them
know that you have an adult mind. No matter what you do, it'll look like
the actions and sound like the babbling of a baby to them."

"Babbling?" he asked. "What do you mean?"

Lucinda shook her head. "We haven't been talking here. Well, you haven't
been at least. I've been reading your mind. And, before you ask, yes,
they know you're a boy. I didn't change you that much. They just prefer
you to look as much like a girl as possible. And, except for when you
have your diaper changed, no one would ever tell you were a boy. Since
you were found on the steps of this facility, they thought it would be
better that way. That way, if anyone happens to come back looking for
you, they'll be looking for a baby boy and all they have here is a baby
girl. That was my little touch. Of course, no one ever will come looking
for you since I was the one who put you on the steps. Even your family
and friends won't know you're gone."

"W...what?" he stammered.

Lucinda smiled again. "If I just left you here, someone might wonder
where you disappeared to and I couldn't have that. You leaving all your
ritual items around your apartment might have people asking too many
questions and that might have led them to figuring out what you did. Not
something I want to have happen, even if they couldn't summon me
themselves. Therefore, I fixed it so, as far as they're concerned, you
were never born. Not to your parents, at least. Since you're a baby,
obviously you were born to someone. And don't think for a moment that
there's any way for you to get out of this."

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

Lucinda smiled. "If you haven't thought of it already, I'm sure it would
have occurred to you at some point. You'd think that, eventually, your
mind would crack and you'd be a baby in mind as well as body, and never
have any adult thoughts ever again, thus releasing you from this hell.
However, I'm not that stupid, nor that careless. I've been doing this
for a very long time and I've gotten quite good at it. In short, your
mind will function perfectly for as long as you live. Even insanity
won't release you from your torment.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I really must go. I have a few other visits
to make before I greet my new arrivals. And then I have a date with an
angel. Ta."

And with a flash of light, she disappeared while the baby in the crib
wailed in terror as he realized what his life would be like from now on.